This is a slash story. Meaning it's about men with other men. If this isn't what you came to read, I still suggest you give it a read :) If this is something that makes you uncomfortable, I suggest you learn to live with it (but don't read the story lol.)
It is also a sequel of sorts to "Perhaps Love," another one of my stories. I've written it so it can be read independently, but if you want to know the full scope of it, I suggest you click on my penname and go find the link for that story.
I highly appreciate constructive criticism in my reviews. That said, I also highly appreciate things like: OMG OMG I LOVE THIS. Anonymous reviews are on, and I love it when people review.
Anyways, I own none of the pop culture references I make. Otherwise... Enjoy!
A Mild Case of Philophobia
Banging on the door.
"Adam! God damn it!" The female voice is concerned and demanding, both at once.
More banging on the door.
"Adam! We're not leaving until you open this door! And don't make me resort to such measures as to get the house key for this door!" It's a second female voice.
Fine. Slowly, I extract myself from the bed. My pillow is a damp, crinkled mess, and the bed sheet not even tucked into the bed anymore, instead just a crumpled heap that's barely clinging onto my bed. I stand up, but instead of stumbling towards the locked door to my room I make my way to the bathroom.
The banging seems to have stopped which probably meant that they had gone off to get the keys. I make my way to the bathroom sink and look at my reflection in the mirror.
My first impression: I'm pathetic. Never mind my black hair which seems to be an utter mess over my face – it's like that always anyways. Never mind my almond shaped eyes which haven't seen any sort of dryness for a week now. Never mind my lanky frame that refused to have much food and hasn't gotten much sunlight because I've been skipping school – something I would never normally do.
I'm pathetic because I can see the life gone from me. And that my face, my body, my posture – all betrays the fact that my heart is broken.
"Adam Lee!" comes a voice from behind me, and I see that my 3 best friends all there, looking concerned and worried. Hah. I used to think He was one of my best friends... And for a long time... He was my everything... but now I've gone and ruined it all...
I start to tear up again and at once, like a warm blanket on a cold evening, my friends are all over me, hugging and holding my hand. And for the first time in a week... I think I begin to need Him less.
My name is Adam Lee.
I'm Chinese by blood, mostly anyways (I have a Caucasian grandmother.) American by citizenship. I'm six feet flat, a nice tall height. I have impossibly wavy hair and dark brown to black eyes. I wear glasses, or contacts, depending on my mood for the day. I like mint chocolate chip ice cream, videogames, and theatre. My hometown is Parsimony, Florida – where my father owns his own business and my mother strives to be the perfect Chinese-American housewife.
Oh yeah. I'm gay. Pfft. But you already knew that, didn't you?
In high school, people tell you that you're currently going through the best times of your life – that you'll look back ten years later and remark on how much fun you had, about all those friends you made, about how so and so was so hot at that time and now has a major beer-belly, and about all the other crushes you had.
Funnily enough, they tell you the exact same thing when you start university. Suddenly THESE are the best times of your life. Your youth is now! Seize the day! Life is short! Translation: Go out and sleep with as much people as you can, because no one will want you in ten years time, and your body won't cooperate with you as well by then either.
How terribly terribly dismal. Fuck that I say. I'm going to remain young and fit for years to come – so I say 'screw you – I'm going to study.' Then in five years time, when I'm heading a multinational company, making more money a month that you do in a year, and living in my gorgeous house driving my gorgeous car, I'll find some guy who is ten times hotter and ten times more intelligent than any of you in college ever were and get with him.
So bring on university. And to hell with your version of carpe diem.
"Alright freshmen, that concludes the quick tour of the campus. I'm sure in the next few weeks, you guys will get lost frequently and show up late for lectures and whatnot, but you will all learn in time!"
The man giving the tour was a postgraduate student. Medicine I think he said he did. William I think he said his name was. He was built, tall, and had short, dark brown hair. He had been bringing us around for the past few hours, in my new university. I admit, I chose this school mostly for the academics, but it doesn't change the fact that the surroundings were absolutely breathtaking, with the open grounds and some of the trees approaching the start of autumn, the orange and yellows spreading across the trees like paint splatters drawn by a crazy monkey. It's funny how in many ways, autumn is an ending – yet at the same time, it marked the beginning of something, namely, a school year. University is where I'll study hard, aim high, and end up with damn good grades – unlike high school where I wasted time with... you know... Him. Let's not talk about Him.
"So this is as good a place to end the tour as anywhere – in front of the student building, which is owned and operated by the student body. There're some places to eat inside if you are looking for some, but otherwise, if you have any questions, I'll be around for a bit so you can ask them."
I quickly reached into my backpack and pulled out my class schedule. I needed to figure out where this lecture theatre I had never heard of was, and who better to ask than the tour guide right? Plus he looked amiable enough, dressed smartly in a wool sweater with diamond patters over a collared shirt and some faded jeans.
I approached William(?) as he finished talking to the last student near him – the others had begun to go into the building and it looked as if I was the last one who would talk to him – the better for him to give me some tips on where best to study and which lecturers were known to be good. Medicine was similar to Biochemistry anyways, so he must haves taken some similar subjects as I will be taking.
"Hey." I say, as I get near him.
He looks at me and smiles with, what I must admit, is a very photogenic smile. You could hire him for a toothpaste commercial with that smile. "What's up?"
"Um... do you have some time to answer a few... well... maybe more than a few, questions?"
He looks around, seeing the rest of the people disappearing. "Yeah, sure. You know what? Everyone seems to be leaving, so if you have quite a lot of questions do you want to come with me to have a coffee or something? I'm dead tired and need my caffeine boost."
We start heading into the building and I notice how tall he actually was – probably around six four, compared to my six feet – normally pretty tall as it is. But somehow he dwarfs me considerably. He walks with a confident air – completely opposite to me, who is hunched up in my large jacket that's slightly too big.
"So... you're Adam right?"
"Y... yeah. Wow you have a good memory. I told you that like... a few hours ago."
He chuckles. "Nah, don't always remember names. Well, you know... I'm William, in case you forgot." He smiles and offers a hand while walking.
I was right, his name is William. I smile and take his hand in mine and give him a shake. He has a good, solid handshake – something my father has always taught me to give. But I also notice that his hands are soft and have a weird sort of gentleness to them. I had an impression of him becoming a good surgeon or something. We reach the coffee place and he goes up to the counter.
"One espresso with cinnamon and uh..." he turns to me, "what do you want Adam?"
"Wha? What? No no. I can get my own."
"Nah, don't sweat it dude. What do you want?"
"No, that's alright... I don't drink coffee anyways."
He laughs a mirthful laugh – one of those laughs that isn't at all condescending, but instead warm and cheery. "You will soon. Let's start today." He turns back to the cashier. "He'll have one of what I'm having too."
As we wait for our coffee he turns to me and asks me a few things, you know, where I was from, what major I was thinking of doing, did I live at a dorm, and I answer them one after another as I asked some perfunctory questions back. We got our espressos and we move outside the building and find a nice semi-shaded table, sitting ourselves down.
"Go on. Try some." He says, and I take an obligatory sip of the espresso, jumping a bit at how hot it was. "Careful!" he says.
I take a more careful sip. It was bitter, with a dash of cinnamon, but not too bad I suppose. I open my backpack again and take out my schedule and some paper, and ask him, what I admit, is a lot of questions regarding lectures and lecture theatres. He jovially answers them one after another, being the pinnacle of patience, knowledge, and useful information. I briefly wonder if they accept med students according to how perfect they are.
"And don't take Ms. Yates' classes on human genetics, they are utterly terrible. Instead, you should take Mr. Gleeson's classes – similar content material, but taught heaps better."
"Haha, thanks William."
"Oh please, call me Will. Everyone else does." He says, smiling and sitting back in his chair, sipping more of his coffee. "All done with questions?"
"Y... yeah. I think so. Um... thanks so much. So so sorry to have taken up so much of your time."
"Not a problem at all Adam. Always glad to help out. Could I ask you something now?"
"Uh... yeah... sure."
"Do you want to go clubbing tonight? It's just me and some of my friends, and well... an entire club full of people."
I'm a bit surprised but I react anyways. "Um... uh... clubbing? I don't really... I don't know... um... It's not something I... do... sort of thing."
He laughs again. "And you used to not drink coffee Adam." He picks up my coffee, which is now half empty, waving it in front of me. "You'll find that college is all about new things Adam, and you should give all of them a shot."
" But we barely... um... met. Wouldn't... uh..."
He grins at me again. "God, you are so shy! Look, I won't take no for an answer... so... give me your dorm room number and your cell phone number and I'll drop by... say... around 11 pm and make sure you come along. And don't give me that look – eleven is not that late. School doesn't start for a few days, and you can spare a night! You can meet some new people, make some friends, that sort of thing."
I couldn't really say no to Will. He had this... personality which was impossible to turn down. He somehow made you not want to disappoint him for fear of bad things happening to... I don't know... puppies. So I wrote down my dorm room address and phone number and gave it to him. He smiled and put it into his pocket.
"Great! I'll see you at ten. Dress well. But as for now... I really must dash. Got lots to do. You'll love it here at college, trust me!" he stands up, and gives me a quick nod and walks off down the walkway.
Clubbing huh? Well, I'll go just once, before the study begins to pile up. Maybe it won't be too terrible. I smile wearily to myself and drink another sip of espresso. Coffee really isn't that bad, actually.
Did you like it?
For those of you who read Perhaps Love, I'm sort of keeping aspects of that (with the whole breaking the fourth wall part still left in.) Anyways, for the rest of you, I hope you liked the first chapter!
Please read and review!