Now or Never

Part I

Entitled: Unnamed Senior

Note: You'll need to read this first chapter of the Now or Never series in order to understand the chapters following it. All stories are based off of true stories. The real identities of these persons will not be given away. These stories are meant to be short fiction pieces. If anything in this chapter, or following chapters offend you I apologize in advance. No offense was meant.

"Show me love," I told my boyfriend, Jason. We've been a little rocky after about two years of dating each other. I wanted to trust Jason, I really did but sometimes it seemed like he forgot that I was standing right in front of him.

"I can't show you something that you feel," he said, giving a huff. I looked at him with angry eyes. Jason's a year younger than I am. I'm a senior in high school, and this was the year of now or never. I could choose to go to my own senior prom, or I could just never go. Everything needed to be finished this year, or continued for the long run. I don't think that Jason and I will continue if he keeps acting this way.

Last year a new herd of freshman entered the high school. Now they're sophomores, but I can't help but still hate them. Especially one girl that seems to stand out from the rest of them, without even trying. I don't know her name and I don't know who or what ethnicity she is. Her beauty is different, sophisticated and exotic. Her wardrobe varied by day. One day I saw her walking the halls in skinny jeans, Vans and a t-shirt. The next day she was wearing pin striped dress pants, suspenders and a crisp button down top. I didn't know if it was a class requirement for something, or if she had decided that one trend wasn't good enough for her. I admired her in a sense because she was so unique and mysterious, but she began to become more and more annoying.

Jason would meet me in the hallways of school and inform me if he saw the exotic beauty or not. I could never tell if he was excited to see her or not. That was the disadvantage of our height difference he could easily hide his eyes while I showed everything from my lower altitude. Jason continued to inform me when he saw the exotic beauty and it became annoying. No one would be able to miss that girl. After finally adjusting to high school life, the girl became popular. She talked and laughed with everyone. But she didn't go to people, oh no, people had to come to her. She was loud and funny, and I have caught myself laughing at her jokes, but I won't fall for Medusa's spell. I never see this exotic beauty, but it seems like Jason sees her everywhere. And he enjoys it.

The other week, back in November, I was in the hallway with Jason as we waited for the final bell to ring to signal the end of school. Walking down the hallway with a friend was the exotic beauty. I hadn't known it was her at the time, but I could see it in Jason's face. A goofy smile appeared on his face and he looked down and shook his head. That's how I knew it was her. Whenever Jason and I were together in the hallways and he'd spot her, he'd smile and shake his head. Aggravated at her for always stealing his attention, I had switched places with Jason so that I could watch the exotic beauty's progression towards us. I didn't know exactly if the two of them knew each other or not. In actuality, I'm not entirely sure if I did want to know.

She was all smiles and giggles. The guy walking with her, I did not recognize. It was evident that they got along well though, and if they hadn't been so separated, anyone could have guessed that they were going out. The exotic beauty looked up from the ground and caught my eyes. Her eyes were an alarming black color, and her skin was tanned nicely (enough to make any girl jealous). Her hair was exceptionally well done today, and she wore a sweater dress, a purple tank top, skinny jeans, purple flats and little make-up. She probably liked the guy she was with. She smiled at me and I returned it with a sneer. A look of shock washed over her face and she looked back to the ground. She had no right to smile at me.

Ever since that incident, Jason has been distant and the exotic beauty is barely ever seen. That, or Jason just doesn't bother to report. I saw them talking once in the hallway, but when my presence was quickly noted, they separated immediately. Jason acted as if nothing was wrong, as if he didn't know that I didn't like this beauty.

"We can see the effects of the wind. Show me the effects of love," I said to Jason, determined to receive an answer from him. He sighed and looked at me. His blue eyes were looking strained and his lips formed a small frown. This wasn't the answer that I was hoping for. "I don't think that I can," he sighed, running his hands through his hair.

"Why not?" I was more than hurt, I was crushed and angry. Did he have to tell me this right after the New Year?

"Because we were never in love," he said, using his finger to point between us.

"I thought we were."

"You said that we were. I didn't feel like I was, even when I said that I loved you. And I know that you didn't either. We prolonged this whole thing, and now it's just going to be worse," he whispered, grabbing my hands which had instinctively grabbed the bottom of his flannel shirt.

"Don't say that," I whispered back, letting my head rest on his chest. I barely came up to his collar bone. "Is there someone else?"

"Who else would there be? I don't have anyone to go to," Jason said, his voice cold.

"What about Girl?" I asked. We had deemed the exotic beauty "Girl" after three weeks of seeing her at our lunch.

"What about her?"

"You haven't reported anything about her. Is it because you don't want to tell me the truth?"

"Don't blame this break up on some girl that I always see in the hallway or at lunch," he said pushing my hands from his shirt. It was already starting, "This is between us, not us and Karia."

"You know her name?"

"Of course I do. People scream it down the halls all of the time." That made sense and I didn't feel like questioning him further. He wasn't mine to question. Nor did I really need to question. Days after I realized that my ignorance to their friendship was just denial. I didn't want to know, so I didn't allow myself to acknowledge it. The goofy smiles, the secret jokes, everything- I just ignored it all.

"Alright, well I've got to go. See you," I said a frown on my lips. Jason gave me one last goofy smile before walking away from my front porch. The smile never really reached his eyes, and his shoulders were hunched over, but I didn't doubt that he was celebrating just a little inside. I had been blaming all of our relationship problems, our trust and commitment problems, on this random girl that was just being nice. It was just his friend trying to be nice to me. Now I end up with the best guy I've ever dated walking away from me. This is when I choose: to call him back now, or never.

Based on a true story

Written: 02 January 2008

If there are any mistakes, please tell me. I'd super dooper apperciate it.

Edit: 20 December 2008