The first of many, I hope! These will probably be the fastest-updated of my stories, since they're all oneshots. At least, that's my hope. As we're all aware by now, I have a habit of procrastinating no matter how simple the assignment is. My bad! Anyway, perhaps this will redeem me? Here we go!

The Frog Prince or, in my retelling, The Nude Knight

She scowled and dumped the load of fire wood onto the ground with an angry huff, successfully rending another gaping maw in the sleeve of her dress. "It's really not that difficult, is it? Just take the dance and rework it to include the presentation scene."

Frederick wrung his hands in concern. "But it will simply destroy the tone of the whole evening! I shall have to rework the color scheme, and the flower arrangements, oh, goodness...BARTEMAEUS! Fetch my material samples!" The... stars above, he didn't actually have a title, did he? The pitiful excuse for a man raced off into the shadowed door of the great hall, rambling about sashes or swaths or some other nonsense.

Seerie did not have time for this ridiculousness today.

It would be just her luck that the head of the kitchens, gardener, and chief stable boy would all fall ill the same blasted day. The same blasted day, which just so happened to be the anniversary of the battle that won them the Gorgon War, which meant plenty of snobbish politicians and bureaucratic rats trailing through and sniffing at everything. Which meant, apparently, more work for her. The normally good-natured laundress/seamstress/magician's apprentice (mustn't forget that one, it was her actual position) stormed through the servant's entrance and into the bustling energy of the royal kitchens. Seerie could not cook worth a gypsy's promise, and that was well known, so the most she could do here was keep the stoves burning and strive to not trip over anything.

"SERRHEANNA!!!" The bellow pierced even the clatter and sizzle that rushed at her ears from every waking corner. Seerie slowly turned to face the would-be General Commander of the knight's keep, gritting her teeth. "There is a...fountain issue that needs to be dealt with."

"Don't use my full name, Andrion, or I'll be forced to create several more issues you'll have the pleasure of sorting out."

Just as she was preparing for a very satisfying lecture, several more voices across the courtyard began to vie for her attention. "Seerie!!! Oh, heavens, Seerie, where are you? Help!"

Seerie took a steadying breath and peered around the corner, dreading the sight of the gardens. Her fears were confirmed as the Princess Henrietta could be seen using her headdress to try and cap the growing waterfall exploding from the side of a busted aqueduct. Allowing herself only the smallest of groans, the petite mage pushed the tall young man aside and strode purposefully towards the chaos. "Buckets, please, Andrion,"

"But-"

"Now." Her voice brooked no argument, and she did not bother to turn and see if he had obeyed. Had he not, she knew of several low-grade curses that would cause ...things to fall off.

It was quickly becoming a very, very bad day.

She reached the site of the disaster and immediately removed her apron, kneeling to the muddy earth and stretching it taut across the overflow. "Cheesecloth, your Highness. And don't let your mother see that hat." Henrietta nodded once and tore off, long legs sending her many-layered skirts up in frothing waves around her knees. It would have been immensely entertaining, had Seerie been in the mood to be amused. As it was, she could barely keep from screaming.

She took several slow, deep breaths, and called to her side the twins Dylak and Don, both of whom looked rather terrified.

"I want you two to bring me a potato sack filled with soil from the other side of the hedge, yes?"

Though she was quite sure they were confused beyond belief, they both nodded vigorously. "Good. Off you get."

And just like that they were sprinting quick as hares across the courtyard. Fancy that. Perhaps her angry face was more frightening than she had imagined.

She was pondering this as Andrion approached with several small buckets, snatched from the kitchen cupboards with a haste she knew he normally wouldn't have afforded her.

"Fine. Now build me a dam." Andrion stared at her, normally haughty visage slack with disbelief.

"A what?"

"You heard me." Seerie responded firmly. Unable to point, she nodded with her chin toward the artificial stream winding through the garden, and now, through her apron. "We need to divert the water until her Highness returns with a patching kit."

"I am not," Andrion began with a wrinkled nose, "an aquatic engineer."

"And I," Seerie responded, voice a furious snarl, "am neither cook, cobbler, jester, horse-whisperer, nurse, or emissary, though I have been asked to perform the duties of all today. It does not matter what you are, Andrion, because what you are is a wretched, useless, lazy ass." She paused to inhale quickly before continuing in a low, dangerous voice, "What matters is that, for once, you do something because it is needed, not because it is rewarded. Can you handle that, brave warrior?"

The golden-haired knight, pale and tight-lipped, merely turned and began stacking rough stones, one alongside the other, within the shallow streambed. He worked in silence for several more moments as Seerie sank deeper and deeper into the bog that was forming parallel to the leak.

And then, rejoice! "I have the cheesecloth! I have the cheesecloth!" Henrietta, missing a boot, both gloves, and certainly the headdress, shouted as she sprinted past groups of flurried castle help.

"Cheesecloth?" Andrion repeated with a condescension rivaling that of an actual noble's. Seerie chose not to respond, for if she had, it wouldn't have been with words.

"Here, your Highness," she said instead, indicating the hole. "Hold it there, please. Tightly, now!" As soon as the thin cotton barrier of her apron could be spared, Seerie lunged for two of the small round stones Andrion had been building with. By tucking them on either side of the injury, she was able to pin the water-resistant cheesecloth over the tear. Now reduced to insubstantial dribbling, the water feature continued undisturbed in it's pleasant gurgling.

"Well, that'll do for now," Seerie murmured, rising to her feet stiffly. Just then the twins returned, lugging a sack twice their combined size between them. Extolling their praises liberally, she quickly dumped extra soil atop the soaked earth, trying to absorb some of the flooding and dilute the mire. When she'd completed she brushed her dirt-covered hands across her skirt, only to be chastised by the princess.

"Oh, Seerie, your dress!" Henrietta's pitying murmur caused Seerie to examine her sorry state. Both shoes had been abandoned earlier that morning, as they had impeded hasty movement. Mud and dirt covered her from head to toe. Her stockings were frayed and torn in numerous places, a bloody gash on her knee turning the raging umber of dried blood and pus. Her shift, petticoat, and apron were soaked through and stained with muck, clinging to her thin legs like a strong breeze was trying to blow her backward. And above all of that was that stink of smoke and pig slops that had followed her since she had carried the livestock their breakfasts before sunrise.

"Well, it's not as though I'm serving, your Highness." Seerie proffered with a weak smile. " I'll be able to change before the end of the meal."

Henrietta's pretty green eyes went blank. "But, Seerie, you are serving. You're to be part of the opening ceremonies." There was a moment of silence, and then Seerie repeated slowly,"I'm to be doing what?"

There was a moment of total silence as Seerie stared wide-eyed around the circle, meeting the shocked gazes of first the twins, then Andrion, then Henrietta herself. "How much time do I have?" She managed in a tense, tired voice.

"Not enough," Andrion offered helpfully. "You look worse than the King's forces after a grueling battle."

"That's because I've been through a grueling battle, you worthless git." But there was no real venom behind her words. The plain fact of the matter was, she had better things to do than sort out Andrion. Her mind whirred as she tried to come up with a solution to the problem. Pale eyes lighting on Henrietta's almost-clean dress, she began to form a plan. "Princess, what time are you needed in the ball room?"

"Not until after the observance. The other ladies and myself enter once the whole grand business is over, so that we aren't involved in all the political affairs-"

Hating to interrupt but realizing that this could go on a while, Seerie bit her lip and asked in an uncertain rush, "Would you mind terribly if I borrowed your dress?"

Her Highness stopped and stared at the laymen, dumbfounded. "My dress?"

"Yes! If I can wear yours to the opening ceremonies, you'll have enough time to go change from mine into another. That one's a bit bedraggled, anyway. Perfect for me, but not so much for the Princess."

Henrietta regarded her small form disbelievingly. "Will it fit?"

Seerie flinched and looked to the ground. "Well, mine will fit you for certain, but yours'll probably be a bit long..."

"A bit long?" Andrion began mockingly, blue eyes narrowed with disdain, "She's three baby hands taller than you, Serrheanna. You'll be swimming in it."

Seerie drew herself up to her full height, which was still only about five feet. "Andrion, tell me, truly, do you want to be able to have children someday?"

Andrion regarded her warily. "I suppose. Why?" There was a pause as a slow smirk spread across his features. "Are you volunteering?"

Seerie's fists glowed a dangerous-looking green. "When the seven circles of hell freeze over and start offering their services as a ski retreat, you prat. But if you did desire progenies, I assure you, I'm about to make sure that particular dream is never realized. "

"What exactly are you insinuating, Serrheanna? That you would take advantage of the generosity of our honorable King and use your new magical knowledge to rebel against him? Such ingratitude!"

There probably would have been a death on the palace grounds had the princess not grasped Seerie's arm at that moment and tugged her towards the nearest garden shed. "Come on, Seerie! We don't have time for you to kill him!"

Still seething, the disgruntled mage allowed herself to be drug into the musty darkness. "Here, now," Henrietta began, her face just visible from the shafts of sunlight peeking through the splintered walls. "The extra length helps us. We don't have time to go get you appropriate shoes, but it's so long no one will be the wiser!"

Seerie allowed herself to be mollified and quickly changed out of the filthy wad that was her overdress.

"I'm so sorry your highness!" She fought back laughter at the sight of the tall, willowy princess squeezed into an outfit several sizes too small, and trashed on top of that.

Fortunately the young royal only giggled and pointed to her friend. "You look pretty ridiculous yourself."

Seerie glanced down at the hemline of her skirt, which extended into an ample train she was sure to trip over. "Oh, Princess, how am I going to make it through this?"

Henrietta only placed her hands firmly on her hips and pushed the door open. "With a smile. Now, don't you dare be late!"

Several hours later, in the dusk of evening, Serrheanna wearily stepped out of the loaned set of voluptuous petticoats. She sighed, looking out the window that marked her simple quarters as being a grade above the rest. The view was magnificent; the whole of the castle grounds, with the cattle lands and grazing ranges beyond. Seerie could even get a peek at the knights training grounds if she walked to the far corner of the room. It was a tight angle, and there wasn't much use in ogling in that direction anyway.

An unconscious frown worked it's way across her features. Knights made her think of Andrion, and Andrion made her think of torture. The ceremony had miraculously gone without a hitch, though she still wasn't quite sure how. It was afterwards that was the trouble...

The donkey's hind-quarter in question had gotten ahold of some ale and several willing buddies, all of whom had lost their tenuous grasp on sobriety. Their remarks alone would have been embarrassing enough, but what was worse was the way Andrion rolled his eyes at them and talked about the "higher grade of female" he was pursuing. Jerk.

Seerie blinked quickly and pretended that the dust from the many layers of her dress was the trouble. Refusing to acknowledge how deeply his remarks had hurt her, Seerie strode purposefully to her bedside and climbed in.

"I wish that braggart looked like the slimy, pestilent nuisance he actually is." Instead of a rather attractive and good-humored bachelor, her brain added silently. Choosing to ignore this unwanted commentary, Seerie rolled over on her side and forced herself to clear her mind. In a few moments, she was asleep.

The magical ward woke the next morning to the sound of bloodcurdling screams echoing across the keep grounds. With a startled yelp, Seerie jerked upward in bed only to smack forcibly against a low ceiling beam. "Oooow..." she moaned sleepily, groping blindly for the doorframe as she stumbled across the room.

She was internally debating the wisdom of investigating the shrieks still echoing through the tower when the question was answered for her. The head of a young freckled man appeared at the window. This would have been less distressing had her quarters not been several stories off the ground.

"Rise and shine, my dear. Time to fix whatever trouble you've caused."

Seerie rubbed her eyes, mind quickly sharpening in the face of these strange events. "Your Wisdon. I didn't know we had lessons today. I'll be dressed in a moment-"

"No time, Serrheanna. I'm afraid your presence is required immediately."

Seerie felt an iron knot coil within her stomach. What on earth did that mean? Was it about all the chaos yesterday? Had she been found out? Moving toward the door, she was stopped suddenly by her teacher's voice.

"No time for that either, child. Move quickly."

The Wisdon gestured toward the window as though he expected her to open it up and crawl out. No brooms, of course, that quaint tradition died out long ago after several fire-hazard incidences. Instead, His Wisdon was standing on what most strongly resembled a wooden platter engraved with intricate symbols. It was called a whenboard, and she would get one at the event of her certification.

Seerie stared round-eyed at the contraption. "I'm not sure I-"

"Climb aboard." The direct command could not be ignored, so she nervously leaned out the small window, excruciatingly conscious of her loose pajamas. Knowing The Wisdon would be annoyed with further hesitance, Seerie swallowed hard and pushed away from the side of the building, coming to rest lightly on the whenboard, which had grown in diameter to accommodate her.

Without further explanation, her mentor directed the hovering disc toward the keep, where a crowd of armor-clad knights were gathered in a cluster.

As the whenboard settled to the ground, a handful of warriors flocked to their sides.

"Your Wisdon, what can be done? Is he alright? Is it curable?" Paying no notice to Seerie except to shoot her a malicious glare, the lead knight allowed himself to be elbowed aside by a companion. This new man had pretty much the same conversation, though he did point out that whoever 'he' was, he was talking, and asking for some sort of consolation.

Worried, now, Seerie and broke through the edge of onlookers expecting to see a knight with a critical injury.

What she saw was a frog.

An unusually-colored frog, to be sure, but still just a frog. She was about to turn and ask for an explanation herself when the gold amphibian spoke to her.

Yes, spoke.

Now, Seerie was not short on strange occurrences. Mysterious happenings, oddities, and tales of the weird and wonderful were all a part of her trade. But she had never been spoken to by a frog. But what was even weirder than being spoken to by a frog was being spoken to by a frog with Andrion's voice. Instead of a croak, or chirp, or hum, or whatever other unusual methods of communication frogs employ, the water-splasher turned it's goggle-eyes toward her and spoke with the same smooth arrogance the decorated knight had dismissed her with yesterday.

Well, she supposed it could be described as smooth arrogance, if the listener was deaf. What it actually resembled was a three-year old Princess Henrietta throwing a temper tantrum. It was utterly impossible to understand what he was going on about.

And then Seerie understood.

She supposed she could see why her reaction was frowned upon. But he deserved it! All she could do in face of this fortuitous turn of events was laugh.

"Do...d-do you mean to tell me- am I to understand that... is that Andrion?"

As she received the affirmative for that conclusion, Seerie lost the ability to speak in favor of raucous mirth.

After several moments His Wisdon placed one slender hand upon her shoulder and said in a low voice, "Perhaps we should go about correcting this."

Andrion's immediate response was in a high, near-hysterical voice that did not closely resemble his own. "Shall we? I don't fancy a diet that includes flies."

Seerie lost it again.

Of course, the Wisdon quickly began thinking of ways this atrocity could have happened, and, more importantly, how it could be corrected. However, it may be noted that all privy to the accident had a bit of a twinkle in their eyes, and had to be excused soon afterwards. All, that is, except Andrion's comrades.

"What have you done to him, witch?!" They advanced on Seerie so angrily that she positioned herself behind His Wisdon, who the knights were loathe to approach.

"I didn't do it on purpose!" She protested, though the miserable Andrion challenged her immediately on that point.

"You're always threatening to magic me in some way, now you've gone and done it!" His froggy features were so comically tragic that Seerie would have begun laughing again, had the Wisdon not begun questioning her.

"You say you didn't cast a spell?" He inquired calmly, apparently regarding the whole mishap as just another problem to be erased with alchemy and good sense. Seerie shook her head furiously, though the chorus of shouts that rose against her was deafening.

"But of course she's lying! Everyone knows how much she hates Andrion! Just ask!"

Henrietta, who had appeared on the scene in a beautifully woven robe, clucked her tongue at the enraged and slightly inebriated mass. "That's ridiculous. Seerie doesn't hate Andrion at all, though she finds him a bit trying at times. In fact, if you ask me, she-"

Seerie interrupted, face flushed a brilliant scarlet. "I'm not a fan, I admit it freely. But I cast no spells on him. Besides, if I was responsible, I would have taken away his ability to speak, not turned him into a frog. What good does that do me if he can still make snide comments?"

The brawling boys, momentarily struck dumb, stared contemplatively at the indignantly squawking Andrion, before one in the back spoke up triumphantly "Maybe you're just not a very good wizard!" A cacophony of support followed.

His Wisdon had drowned all this out however, and was staring thoughtfully at Serrheanna. "Seerie," he began thoughtfully, "have you noticed a strengthening of your abilities lately?"

She bit her lower lip and shrugged. "I suppose so, now that you mention it, but I don't understand how-" His Wisdon cut her off, gesturing excitedly toward the now-frantic frog.

"Don't you see, Serrheanna? You've graduated to the final level of your apprenticeship!" The din lowered to a dull roar as the company tried to understand what he might mean, though the only person who appeared to get it immediately was Seerie herself.

"But-but, I swear I didn't think about it like that! I only wished..."Her voice trailed off as she recalled her words from the previous evening. As clarity dawned in her denying mind, she clapped her hands over her mouth and stared in horror at the amphibian before her.

"Oh, dragon's flame." Seerie whispered in shock. "I broke Andrion."

His Wisdon didn't seem disturbed in the least. In fact, he seemed downright overjoyed. Still, in light of his power, it took the King's finest several moments to work up the courage to question his reaction. His Wisdon's response was immediate and eager.

"You know, of course, of the three levels of Wisdon Wisdom, yes? First, know the magic with your mouth, then with your hands, then with your mind. Serrheanna has finally bridged between these last two stages. Oh, I'm so proud!" The enraptured Wisdon had done nothing to alleviate the stress the knights felt, so they turned their attentions to Seerie.

She cleared her throat awkwardly. "As you learn, magic becomes more and more a part of you. In the beginning you have to memorize and recite spells to get a result. Eventually, you become skilled enough where only hand gestures are required. After that, you can simply will magic into being with your mind." There was the level beyond that, but Seerie didn't really want their brains to explode just yet. "It appears I can now cast spells unconsciously, without actually making a decision or action that precipitates it."

His Wisdon clapped an arm around her shoulders and continued the explanation. "There are always a few glitches in the transition period. In time Seerie will be so comfortable with her new power she'll be able to stay in bed all day and cook and clean from there!"

'Frightening image', Seerie thought.

"But what is to be dome about me!?" The pitiful wail came from the slick-skinned creature now gazing imploringly at the Wisdon with large blue eyes. That, too, was a bit strange...

His Wisdon tsked quietly and knelt forward. "I'm afraid, Andrion, as this isn't a hex, there is no counter-spell. We'll simply have to wait until Seerie wishes you back the way you were on her own."

Andrion pivoted and hopped to squat in front of Seerie. "You heard him, Serrheanna! Wish me back!"

Seerie gazed helplessly downwards as His Wisdon chuckled softly. "No, my boy, you don't understand. The spell has to be unconscious. I recommend you stay at her side every moment until you're back to normal. Maybe you'll win her over with your dashing charm and clever wit." Winking quickly at Serrheanna, the Wisdon hopped on the whenboard and hovered away, shouting "Make sure you eat together and sleep in the same bed, and all that rubbish! I'd hate for this to last any longer than necessary!" Then he was gone, and the company turned to stare incredulously at the couple in question, who now wore matching shades of green.

The next few days were an...experience, to say the least. Given that the spell had not bothered changing any concrete aspects of his personality, and had, in fact, made him surlier than usual, Andrion was just as unbearably pompous and cruel as he was before the amphibious shift (or even more so, when he'd really got going). As for her part, Seerie was not feeling all that concerned for her victim, and rather enjoyed participating in events or pastimes that she knew he missed a great deal.

The jousting tournament, for instance. The morning after the transformation was discovered, all the senior knights gathered in the courtyard and challenged one another to do whatever it was they thought would prove their manhood. Seerie normally would have steered clear of the occasion, though she was responsible for all the decorating beforehand (she'd spent upwards of eight hours festooning garlands about the palace). However, she decided to torment Andrion with the sight of his friends participating in one of his favorite hobbies. So, pocketing the now ever-present frog, she made her way into the stands constructed for just this purpose. Observing the tournament, of course, not harassing those of the webbed-footed persuasion.

As they made their way to the seating area designated for the castle workers, Andrion kept up the barrage of complaints that had been relentless since their partnership.

"Of course, if I were myself, I'd be able to sit with men of my own caliber, rather than these commoners. Though I suppose you don't mind; I'd be used to it, too, after a lifetime. I can't believe they've got me masquerading as your familiar, the idea is laughable. Do you really expect all the guests for the Gorgon Festival to buy that? I can talk, for goodness sakes. I-"

Seerie cut him off with a roll of her eyes. "Have you ever met anyone's familiar, Andrion? Perhaps they're all whiny babies. In any event, the king can't have his colleagues know that one of his best knights was stupid enough to anger the magician's apprentice."

Andrion, now perched on her knee, turned his now very prominent eyes towards her furiously. "Perhaps His Highness doesn't want the company to know that his future Wisdon is inclined to magic those she's jealous of!"

"Jealous?"Seerie exclaimed with a burst of impatience. "What have I to be jealous of? Your horrible people skills, or perhaps it's your comical self-importance that I desire? You've no useful talents, no endearing personality quirks, and no friends who bathe! Why would anyone be jealous of you!?"

Her words rang out into the seats around them, and she might have been embarrassed by the aggravated glares she was receiving, had she not been so fed up. Rising to her feet, and effectively knocking Andrion from his roost, she quickly stormed down the steps and away to her quarters.

"Slow down, you great melon! I can't keep up with you!" Andrion frantically hopped after her, the only chance for his return to a human form, but she ignored him. Soon Andrion was left alone in a crowd of hurried onlookers, many of whom nearly crushed him with their gigantic feet. Moving erratically to avoid being squashed, Andrion's frightened frog-heart beat a staccato in his tiny ribcage. Finally admitting defeat, he flung himself to the almost-safety beneath the benches and peered, terrified, at the rush of deadly shoes marching in front of his vision.

Seerie made it out of the stands and halfway to the servant's living quarters before her conscious attacked her viciously.

'I suppose you think that was fair, leaving him to fend for himself. You know how hazardous it is in that mess, even for a person! How do you expect him to avoid the hazards that are ten times his size? What good will it do to turn him human again if he's a smudge on the pavement?'

Spinning on her heel and letting loose a string of obscenities that would make even Andrion blush, Seerie ran back to the entrance of the stands. It took a surprisingly small amount of time to find their seat, given she was shoving people aside with no regard to social graces. Of course, when she found their seats empty, she was nearly hysterical, immediately turning to the bystanders and asking if they'd seen her frog. That wasn't received well...

"Serrheanna? Is that you?" The watery voice drifted from beneath the benches a row in front and to the left. Crying out in relief, Seerie pitched herself forward so that she was on eye-level with her amphibian friend, completely ignoring the startled exclamations of the people whose behinds were just a few inches above her.

"Andrion!" She exclaimed, feeling more relief than she was really comfortable with. The small creature plopped forward until she could reach him. Gently gathering him toward her, Seerie apologized over and over again for leaving Andrion behind, but his only response was to wriggle into her front pocket.

"Stop blabbering and take me home. I'm hungry."

Mealtimes themselves were quite the adventure. Without the jaw or teeth of a man, Andrion was forced to live off of a diet of fruit and eggs.

He did not appreciate this.

So every meal was punctuated by his very distracting commentary, which ran the gauntlet between what kind of food he liked and the carrion he observed on the last carriage ride. As a result, their dinners became very lonesome affairs. It got to the point where Seerie decided to accommodate the masses by grabbing her and Andrion's trays and eating upstairs. This wasn't that bad, just a bit awkward at times. She'd never been expected to hold a conversation before.

On one of these occasions, with Seerie poking disinterestedly at her porridge with apples, Andrion decided to Get to Know Her.

"What?" Seerie mumbled around a mouthful of apple.

"Perhaps if we understand each other a bit more, you would be better inclined to help me." The earnest expression looked out of place on his amphibious features. "It can't possibly make anything worse." Hastily backtracking, Andrion's wary gaze flitted quickly to her hands. "At least, I hope not."

"...alright, I guess." Seerie felt an uncomfortable constriction in her gut. The prospect of 'befriending' Andrion, even in this time of necessity, seemed completely alien to her. What if he turned out to be even worse than she imagined?

"Fine." He appeared to be composing himself for a trying ordeal, and if she looked half as bad as he sounded, they were a sad pair indeed. "I grew up in Manners..."

Her snort of laughter cut him off. "What?" His terse response made her grin wider, and she just waved him on. "Really," he continued, "if it's that amusing, I should like to be privy to it. I am short of humor in my life, at the moment."

Seerie bit the inside of her cheek to keep from grinning and shook her head. "I just have a strong appreciation for irony, is all."

Andrion regarded her in silent thought for a few moments. "Irony." She fidgeted as his suddenly human eyes studied her intently. "In that vein, it might be noted that I've seen you laugh more as a frog than as a man."

Seerie moved her hands restlessly, unsure of how to respond. "Well... it's a humorous situation."

Her company only shook his head as well as he was able. "You're always so cross. I didn't even know you could laugh until all of this nonsense."

Rolling her eyes, Seerie pushed herself impatiently to her feet. "Everyone can laugh, Andrion."

"You wouldn't have thought so, not by looking at you. Why do you take yourself so seriously?" Hopping quickly from the bed, Andrion placed himself inquisitively at her feet.

"Me?" Seerie exclaimed. "You're the one who's so high on himself. I can't ask you for the slightest bit of help without you reminding me of all your accolades."

He only blinked and watched her expression with the same blue, unwavering gaze. "How else am I supposed to talk to you, Serrheanna? If I'm polite and respectful you look right through me. I'd wager you don't even remember meeting me."

She didn't, of course. Flustered, Seerie just pointed an accusatory finger at her amphibious associate. "That's no excuse for tormenting me!"

Andrion hopped back to the bedside. "Isn't it? You're so different, anything I said you found tediously dull. I can still remember the way your eyes glazed over." Andrion's voice grew stiff with masked emotion. "I'll take annoyance and frustration over being invisible, thank you."

Seerie felt herself weaken and sighed, returning to her seat. "I suppose I'm a tad frightened. No one here believes I can take over for the Wisdon. I'm just trying to..." She struggled a moment before throwing her hands up in defeat. "To prove them wrong."

Andrion rolled his eyes and both felt the tension lessen. "Well after this, Serrheanna, I don't think anyone will doubt your abilities."

Seerie wrinkled her brow and studied him. "Why do you call me that?"

"What?" He frowned at the question. "You mean your name?"

"Well, yes. I mean, no one else does, except His Wisdon." She shook her head slightly and looked away. "And he doesn't follow anyone's rules but his own."

"I suppose..." Andrion paused a moment, watching the shadows outline her profile. "I suppose I just like Serrheanna. It suits you."

"Oh." Seerie turned red, though it may just have been a trick of the light, and cleared her throat. "What if I called you Andy?"

He drew himself up to his full height of two and a half inches and adopted the most imposing stance he could muster. "Then I suppose I would have to challenge you to a duel for dishonoring a knight."

She laughed weakly, and the unexpected awkwardness dissipated in the face of the warm glow of the fading sunlight."It's late."

Andrion hummed his agreement and settled himself into the nest of socks and scarves Seerie had created from him. The mage in question blew out her bedside candle and wished him sweet dreams. "Good night, Andrion."

"Good night, Serrheanna."

The next morning found Seerie stripping in front of her wardrobe, anticipating several hours of free time. Andrion was taking full advantage of his indisposition by catching up on his beauty sleep, and for the past week had not awoke before lunchtime. Therefore the appearance of a groggy pair of blue eyes in the corner of her bed was not received well.

Andrion might have escaped persecution had he not then leapt to the floor and stared, agape, at her nearly-naked form.

The result was disastrous.

"Ooooh, you miserable, horrible, depraved amphibian!" Seerie shrieked, trying very hard to kick the quickly-retreating Andrion across her small chambers. "Get out! Get out you corrupt, perverted- GAH! See if I try and turn you human again!" Trying to maintain a firm hold on the rough blanket wrapped tightly around her torso, the only thing protecting her modesty, Seerie hopped and slid until she had effectively wedged herself behind the creaky wardrobe she'd inherited from the last head cook.

"Just what were you doing in here!?" She managed, voice high and shrill, blushing and breathing heavily from her remonstrations.

"Well, since you made me cold-blooded, I live here. Or had you forgotten? Because let me tell you," a furious frog hopped out from under the small trundle bed. At least, she assumed he was furious from the tone of his voice. Amphibians have very limited facial expressions. "I most certainly have not. How the bloody hell was I supposed to know you were going to start...removing...articles of clothing?"

"This is my room! Where else do you expect me to undress?" Seerie immediately regretted the question, and without waiting for a response she continued. "Are your horrid eyes averted?"

Though she was fairly sure his response was terribly disrespectful, Seerie peered carefully around the edge of her shield and, upon seeing no prying peepers cautiously moved into the center of the room.

"Andrion?" She whispered after a moment. A muffled reply came from the vague direction of the bedside table. "What?"

"Stay there, okay? I'm going to get changed."

Andrion said nothing, but Seerie was willing to bet he was regretting the loss of his middle finger.

Now decently clothed in a simple work shift, Seerie perched uncomfortably on the edge of her bed. "Um... You can come out, now."

"About time. There's not that much of you, how much effort does it require to shove it into some sackcloth?"

Flushing brilliantly, Seerie gnawed on her lower lip and stared straight ahead. This was a problem she had not foreseen. Sharing a room with a frog had not been dishonorable in the least. But sharing a room with Andrion was another situation entirely. He had such a bad habit of...getting into things.

Right. Still, His Wisdon had said to sleep in the same bed, and she really couldn't go against the wishes of her master, even if she found them horribly extreme.

"Um, Andrion?"

"What?" He snapped angrily. Seerie actually felt herself smiling, a little. It was nice to know some things never changed.

"Sorry I tried to dismember you." Andrion's only response was a grunt of annoyance, and then he jumped up to sit beside her.

"It's not like anything would surprise me, at this point." Seerie only laughed.

Three weeks went by as one attempt after another failed to return the disgruntled knight to his former state. The whole castle was growing concerned, none more so than Serrheanna, who had discovered that Andrion was not the malicious fellow she had thought him to be.

After being heckled by several of Andrion's self-proclaimed 'brothers' for the umpteenth time, Seerie returned to their shared quarters in tears. Andrion immediately went to her side, having spent the evening with His Wisdon trying to invent a solution.

"What on earth is your trouble? Turned a stable boy into a horse?" This only doubled the intensity of the girl's hysterics, leaving Andrion to deal with a weepy mess.

"Hey, now," He began awkwardly as her wailing continued, "I was only joking. What's the matter?"

She gasped for air and swiped angrily at her eyes. "I don't understand, Andrion! I don't hate you, I don't even dislike you, anymore. I can't think what is keeping you like this! I feel so guilty-"

The sobbing resumed full force as Seerie threw herself on the bed, sending Andrion bouncing upwards in the process.

Vaguely wishing for an arm to pat her back with, Andrion hopped as close to her down-turned face as he could manage and poked his nose between her fingers. "Come now, Serrheanna. I... well, you know, I'm really beginning to feel better for this whole experience." She gave a self-derisive huff and he quickly continued. "No, I'm serious. I know how to hold my own against people ten times my size, fetch my own food, and" here he waited for her full attention. When he felt he had it, he cleared his throat importantly and continued, staring gravely into her eyes. "I will never make fun of you for being short again."

She sniffed and gave a watery laugh (much to his relief) before pulling the blankets over them both. "You're sweet, Andrion. But I'll need that in writing."

Andrion smiled as well as a frog can smile and started to push his way through to the little area designated for him and him only. He was just getting comfortable when, on some impulse neither one of them really understood, Seerie kissed him quickly on the top of his slimy golden head.

"Thanks, Andrion." He must have come up with an appropriate response, because soon Seerie's even breathing could be heard throughout the room. Despite this, Andrion lay awake in the darkness a long time.

The next morning welcomed them with a chorus of bright sunlight that slowly but surely drug the pair from their dreams.

Seerie snuggled blissfully into the warmth that surrounded her. It was a nice sort of warmth, just as comforting as the thin blankets she piled on top of her every night, but better. Had she magiced her throws again? She'd done it to her robe once. This whole willful spell-casting thing was getting a bit out of hand...

She yawned and shifted, only to have the warmth tighten it's hold. And now the warmth was mumbling. Freezing mid-stretch, Seerie opened her eyes to find a very naked Andrion curled protectively around her.

"AAAAAAH!" Seerie kicked out and heard a satisfying wumph as she knocked the wind out of the pervert in her bed. "What are you doing here!? What are you doing here without any clothes on!? What are you doing here without any clothes on and without any...frog-ness?

Andrion, having been effectively booted off of the bed, scrambled up from the floor and stared at her with wide eyes, which comically resembled the ones he'd recently adopted. "I'm..."

"Naked." Seerie interjected, finding that the most disturbing point at the moment.

Andrion continued as though he hadn't heard her, and indeed he might not have. "I'm...me, again."He patted down his head and torso, as though assuring himself that everything was in it's proper place. "I'm ME!"

Andrion's jubilant cry was accompanied by an exultant pose, which he struck with both hands thrown high into the air. Seerie, still blushing, stared at the wall. Her very focused inspection was destroyed a moment later as the nude knight threw his arms around her.

"You did it! Oh, Serrheanna, I could kiss you!"

"Could you get dressed first?" Seerie's embarrassed squeak brought Andrion's attention to the problem at hand. He burst into almost hysterical laughter.

"Well, I suppose that's fair! I had my turn, so..." Andrion smirked and leaned his face close to her shocked, red features. "What do you think, Seerie? Could you get used to waking up like this?"

Seerie stared at him, appalled, before her brain unfroze. "YOU LASCIVIOUS TROLL! ONE OF THESE DAYS-"

Andrion just started laughing again, until his skin began to turn grey and thicken. "Seerie!" He exclaimed, panicked, as the transformation began creeping up his torso.

Seerie just scowled at him. "What do you expect me to do about it?"

"Whatever you did to fix this last night!" Andrion's brain spun frantically as he searched through his memory for anything of the ordinary in their nightly routine.

"Kiss me!" He exclaimed, grabbing her arms quickly. Seerie had precious little time to protest.

"I don't know if I-" She found herself unable to finish as Andrion suddenly pressed a very human pair of lips against her own.

There were a few dazed moments as Seerie tried to remember why exactly she was kissing Andrion. 'Oh, that's right. To fix him.' Satisfied with that response, all coherent thought shut down, until a glimpse of her mirror reminded her that he was, in fact, without clothes.

"ANDRION!"