Chapter 16: I only want to hide from the world
Shane kissed me with hunger.
As if it was the last kiss before entering a war.
Maybe that was the way he saw this reunion with his family, and so did I.
But it was one of the most inappropriate things to do.
But I was not going to be the one ending it.
Because it felt so bloody brilliant.
Even when we broke apart for forces majeur as need of air, I really didn´t want to, and I kept my hand on his waist, were they had snaked as we kiss, and his hands were still on my neck.
I could tell, Shane was even more surprised than me.
"This shouldn't be happening." He said slowly, so close still that his lips brushed mine as he spoke.
I shook my head no. "It was a mistake." I added.
"Exactly." He agreed, kissing my lips once more.
But a strange noise on the stairs made us broke apart abruptly, and I blushed madly. It broke the spell.
"Fuck." Muttered Shane.
I was tempted to do the same.
Instead, Danny opened the door, and when he saw Shane standing next to me, he glared at him.
"I thought you were going to be hiding in the tallest place you could fine." Danny said walking inside the room with his death glare fix on Shane, who didn´t even look at him. "I didn´t knew you were with him."
Danny said him as if he was speaking about the rival in football.
"Shane showed me this place." I smiled, feeling an undesirable tension between both boys. The fact that I was standing too close to Shane wasn´t a good thing, probably.
"I'm sure he did." Danny snapped.
"Yes. Your friend didn´t want to go there so I helped her." Shane interrupted me, pointing toward the garden trough the window with one hand.
"What are you trying to say, huh? That I didn´t want to help her?" Danny, of course, couldn´t keep his mouth close.
"No, it's not. He's just-"
Shane didn´t let me finish. "Yes, it is." He snapped.
"Well, aren't you noisy?" My friend said walking closer, with clear intentions of starting a fight. Shane was looking exactly the same, and I was standing in the middle, feeling like just getting the hell away of both. "Who do you think you are? Kissing my girl doesn´t give you the right to give your opinion about nothing."
And just how the hell did he find out?!!
"Danny, what are you-?" I started, but he cut me up.
"It's not with you, so stay away." He pointed.
"Danny, stop this. Ok? Let's just go back down and swallow this whole party up."
"Do you have a problem with me kissing her?" Shane asked ignoring me. I turned to him frowning, but he didn´t even looked at me. This had become a 'who has the bigger playroom' between both of them, and, knowing how this things worked out, I was sure they were just going to ignore me.
"Actually, yes. A lot. For naming a few, the fact that she's going to be your sister, the fact that I don´t like you at all, and the fact that you're coaxing her to kiss you back."
"Coaxing her? She was most willing to kiss me."
"Shane!" That was me, blushing, and glaring at the boy.
"Because you put those ideas into her head!" Danny snapped. "Don´t go kissing the girl that's going to be living with you, Walker, because if you do something to her, I'll kill you. I promise."
"You'll kill me for kissing her?" Shane asked arching an eyebrow.
Something inside of me suspected what was going to happen when he step closer to me, but the mayor part of my brain just ignored it.
"Yes." Danny assured him.
When Shane grabbed my shoulder pushing me toward him, and kissed me softly on the lips, looking straight at Danny's eyes, it took me a second or two to react. But then I broke apart and slapped him as hard as I could, turning around after that, and dragging Danny with me.
Stupid macho man.
"Good done." Danny smirked, walking behind me.
"Close your mouth, you're stupid and I'm contemplating slapping you too."
He did as he was told, knowing me fully well, and Danny walked next to me in silence until we reach the place were it was supposed to be the living room.
It wasn´t, and instead it were a huge ball room.
This was Alice's Maze.
"I shouldn´t have said those things." Danny started with his best innocent smile. He looked irresistible when he did that.
"Of course not. And he didn´t either."
"But… I saw you with him, alone, clearly after a heavy make out session…" Danny trailed of, looking around. He stopped walking in the middle of the dance floor and turned to me. "I'm sorry."
"I know. It's ok. You just can´t help yourself." I smiled. As weird as it seems, I was used to that kind of reaction from Danny.
This time he had a reason.
I mean, the make out session did existed.
Normally, this kind of scenes were about a boy talking to me and Danny believing he wanted to take to bed.
"I can´t." He accepted smirking, and passing an arm around my shoulders. "Are we ok, now?"
"Yeah, Dan. I can´t really hate you."
"I know that." He smirked, kissing my forehead as I put my arm on his waist.
"And you take advantage of that." I stated.
Danny didn´t answered, smiling softly as he leaded me across the dance floor toward a huge door. "What do you think if we get going to the already started party? Are you ready to confront everyone?"
That was the last thing I said until Danny stopped next to the place where I was to be sitting. Right next to Shane. And Harry. I blushed as I took seat, and never ever glanced toward Shane, and I fixed my eyes on my plate as everyone around me spoke in a loud voice.
He was as quiet as myself, though. But it wasn´t that surprising since, apparently, he was always this quite. And he didn´t have annoying friends knowing one a hell of a lot. Jess only smiled at him, and kept a silent eye-conversation with Shane about who knew what.
Harry had noticed my silent state, and was starting to be worried about it to the point of actually grabbing my shoulder, pushing me toward him and ask me WHAT THE HELL was wrong. Lexis was looking at us with expectative, because Danny had told her everything that had happened.
"Nothing's wrong." I stated in a low voice as, on the other end of the table, Harrison stood up to say his speech about how much he loved my mom and all. I could notice most of their relatives glaring at her, and sometimes at me too, and that only made me more conscious of myself. "They hate me." I whispered, taking that opportunity as a different answer than the one that really worried me.
Harry was about to say something, but I interrupted him. "And don´t you dare saying otherwise." I ordered and he stopped.
"Fine. Some of them seem to hate you. But who cares. The Walkers doens´t look like they care about them much." Harry added.
"Ignore them. They're all chauvinist, snobs assholes."
Shane leaned toward me a little, without facing me, and whispered it softly.
I felt goose bumps on my back.
From right next to Harry, Danny glared daggers at Shane when he saw him too close for comfort of me.
"See? Nothing to worried about." Harry smiled.
Yeah, nothing at all.
I opted to ignore all of them by eating the food on my plate. I needed strength if I was about to face all the people in there. And I kept stubborn silence, talking only when someone talked to me. Sawyer and Laurie noticed this, and did as much as they could to annoy me, and they didn´t stopped despite how many glares I sent their ways.
I was actually relived when the food ended, and everyone went toward the little dance floor with some tables and many chairs next to the wood-y part of the garden. But as I was about to escape, Lexis grabbed my arm and dragged me toward one of the far-off tables.
"What the hell is happening between you and you're soon-to-be step-brother?!" She asked in a whispered yell.
"Nothing." Was my instinct answer.
But of course, it didn´t fooled Lexis.
"Then why the hell did he kissed you, huh?" She demanded to know.
"Because… He was trying to upset Danny?" I offered, and she dismissed it with a shrug.
"I'm asking for the truth, darling."
Finally, after trying hard to escape my faith, I obliged and told her everything. Every single thing that had happened since last Friday, every single breath and every single all. About Shane, Sawyer, Jess, Ryan, Harry, Mike, Ashley, and all I cold think of.
She was quite surprise when I ended, but before she could speak, someone interrupted her.
"Hi!" Ryan exclaimed, gaining an instant smile from me. I couldn´t help it. He was just that cute.
"Hi!" I waved. I noticed a little girl grabbing his hand and looking at Lexis and me with weary eyes. "Lexus, this is Ryan. Ryan, here you have my closest girl friend." I introduced them as Ryan and the little girl sat next to us.
"Finally I meet the famous Ryan." Lexis smirked.
"Nice to meet you. This is my sister, Carisol." Ryan smiled widely, introducing the little blushing girl to us. We both smile at her and waved, trying not to be too push over with her. But it was difficult since she was really cute.
We kept talking about idle things for a while, and, finally, Carisol smiled sweetly at me. she was no older than 5, and the cutest child I had ever seen, with her golden locks, her clear eyes, and her pretty princess-esque dress.
While I started playing with her, I could almost see the engines on Lexus' brain working as she glance suspiciously at Ryan. She had probably already talked to Ashley. So, to get rid of her plots, I stood up, and announced I was going to play tag, smiling widely at Carisol to invited her to play with me. Of course, being a child, she accepted immediately, and before Lexus or Ryan could say anything, the girl and me were running after each other, as I ignored everyone else.
We kept playing childhood games for a while with Carisol, and we finally decided to play Hide and Seek. I had take great advantage of the little girl to ran away of every person, saying I was playing with Carisol and couldn´t let her alone. That way, no one really noticed I didn´t like the situation, and everyone thought I was cute, nice, and a great babysitter.
As I was looking for Carisol on the front lawn of the house, where all the cars were parked, I collided with Ryan, and, out of reflex of my craziness, I grabbed his hand and forced him to leaned down behind his car.
"What's wrong?" He wondered. I noticed he had a Disney princess backpack in his hands, and that made me smile.
"I'm looking for your sister." I announced in a whisper.
We were close, too close, and I still had his hand on mine. I liked the feeling, and since he didn´t pushed it away, I didn´t let go. I could think off Ryan. He was nice, cute, and handsome as hell, kind, smart and great in food fights. I could think of him whatever I wanted, unlike Shane. Shane was off limits. It was wrong. And he had a sick derange mind that I couldn´t comprehend and I was not too sure I wanted to. Ryan was safe.
And I liked Ryan.
He smiled a sunshine-bright smile. "Oh. Well, what do you say if we look for her together?"
"Aren´t you having fun in the party?"
"Really?" I nodded, and he blushed a little before answering. "Not at all. At least… I don´t really like most people, and Mr. W had already used me as a way to escape six times. He leaved me alone with his sisters, and his uncles, and his mother, and everyone else he could ditch when I was close."
I couldn´t help but laughed out loud at that, but he silenced me by putting a slender finger over my lips. I think I blushed, as the heat went up to my cheeks.
"Sol would find us." He explained, leaning closer to me. "I think I saw her in… in… behind some… car." Ryan said slowly, breaking the distance between us. His eyes moved to my lips, and stay there while he spoke, a little dazed.
Maybe Ashley is a witch, I remember I thought.
Yeah, she was a witch, and she had put something in the drinks.
What other reason would be for my having so much wants to kiss him, too?
"Yeah… We should… probably… back…" I closed my eyes, leaning toward him.
A loud squealed interrupted us, and when we both looked up, we found Carisol's smiling face upside down.
"I knew it!" She exclaimed, clapping happily. "Kiss!"
Ryan cleared his throat, standing up and helping me do the same. "You noisy brat." He muttered, taking his sister out of the unfamiliar car by the open window.
Carisol pouted. "Are you not going to kiss her?" She insisted.
"No, bratty child!" He snapped, but he was laughing, so the girl turned to me.
"Then you kiss him." She pressed.
I blushed even more.
"Now, Sol. Why don´t you kiss Evan, then? After that, I'll kiss Lyra." Ryan announced. The little face of Carisol contorted in a disgusting expression.
"He had cooties!" She yelled, making us laugh out loud.
Of course, we didn´t kiss. The girl found immediately something else to amuse herself, it being Ryan giving her a piggy ride at fast speed toward the opposite side of the garden, right to the part where the party was not. We play hide and seek until it was unavoidable to go back.
Not because I mysteriously realized I was being a bitch or egoist.
Because my mom, in her stunning dress and wonderful red sandals, appeared out of nowhere in the forest where we were playing.
"Lyra Tabatha Carroll." Melly said in a low modulated voice.
Oh was she pissed.
Even Carisol noticed it.
"Yes, mom?" I asked, trying to look as innocent as I could, but I spoke with a high-pitched voice.
"What are you doing here?" She demanded.
"Hum… Playing with Sol?"
"You're trying to sneak out!"
HAH! She should be glad I even went to the party. I could have stayed inside, right?
"Yes! Lyra, I need you there. Half of the people here already hate me and the other is very keen to do it now."
I sighed. She was right. Maybe if they hated us together it would annoy half as much? "Fine. Sorry, Sol. I need to go back to Do-… I mean party! I'll see you later, ok?"
The little girl pouted a little, but then hugged me and kissed my cheek. "Ok." She stated, grabbing her brother's hand to keep playing.
"Do you want me to go with you? I can tell you who stay very away off…" Ryan joked, smiling at me and my mom.
Mom smiled back. "No, darling. You can stay with your sister. I'm not going to force you into Hell for us." She smirked, waving as she dragged me toward the party.
My mom stopped as soon as we reached Harrison, and he smiled happily to see us. I spend the next hour being introduced to people I didn´t like that actually seemed to hate me. His uncles and his nieces were all as snotty and annoying as they could possible be. The ones that weren´t so bad was because they were already drunk.
I wanted to get away now.
And my lifesaver came in the form of Shane.
"Melly, can I take your daughter for a second? Ashley was looking for her." He said politely. It was amazing how he could be this polite and at the same time, such a bastard. He was… so confusing. Shane was the edge of the cliff.
Even when my mom was a little reluctant to let me go, because we were facing a couple of old bats that already hated us, she finally let me go, acting like the good mother she was and thinking in her daughter first…
If it wasn´t because it was Shane, she would have said something like well, suck it up.
Shane grabbed my arm, and pushed me with his hand on my back toward the house. Only then I realized Ashley was most probably not even looking for me. I tried to ignore the feeling of his hand on my lower back and looking angry at him.
He stopped in the kitchens, behind a huge oven where it was not that crowed.
"I'msorry." He said in one go, so fast I didn´t understand him at first. I did a double take to do so.
And that was all I could think of.
"I acted like a bastard." He nodded, avoiding my eyes.
"Yes, you did." I assured him, crossing my arms over my chest to fight to urge to kiss him. This wasn´t working. I couldn´t live with a boy I wanted so bad… It was going to be a nightmare.
"I'm sorry." He repeated. "I don´t know what possessed me."
"I don´t care. It's ok now." I said with a false smile.
He shook his head. "No, it's not. At least be strong enough to say it out loud." He said annoyed.
In that very moment, I came to terms with the fact I was never going to be ok with Shane. Everything I did seemed to be wrong, everything I said he took it badly, everything about me he thought it was because I was a coldhearted bitch.
And I was suddenly tired.
Of him, of his family, of his mood swings, of this stupid marriage, of everything.
And I had have, maybe, a little too much of champagne.
"You know what? Fuck it." I exclaimed. Alright, a lot too much. I was almost drunk. "Go fuck Lindsay if she made you so happy." I yelled, before storming off.
I was angry as hell and didn´t feel like socializing anymore. Especially not with a Walker, not even with Ashley or Mike. I ran back to my room, getting lost somewhere without really noticing, and knocking over something hard and almost falling to the floor.
"Wow, there! Are you ok, babe?" That was Danny. I was still a little mad at him, but I forgot that when he helped to my feet, pressing my chest to his casually.
I hit his chest annoyed. "You're an asshole, you know that? I can´t stand you. You're just like him." I stated, before leaning toward him and kissing him on the lips.
Danny didn't need much to start kissing me back, as he slid his arms around my waist and pressed me to him.
We had kissed before.
More than once.
And every time, both of us, or just me, were drunk.
And every time, we ended in our underwear on the same bed. Strange enough, we had never have sex in that state.
"What…?" He started when we broke apart to breath. I didn´t let him continued and I kissed him again, pushing him against the wall.
We stumbled against a door, and he opened it, dragging me inside with him. With his hand under my dress, we fell to the bed. My bed, strange enough.
But I didn´t think much after that.
I… just… felt everything turning black, and I fell asleep.
Very quick update. I promise to answer reviews tomorrow!!