How Many Characters Does it Take to Crash a Bus
Kale: He said that to you?!... Well you just need to go and dump him then... What happened in history class?... Do you have Mr. Bole as your teacher?... Oh my gosh! He is such a jerk!... No really! I misspelled George Washington's name and Mr. Bole gives me a C-!... No that wasn't because of the toilet paper incident!... You have to go? Okay, call me later. Bye!
Mino: Talking to a friend?
Kale: What?
Mino: On your cell phone.
Kale: Oh yeah... whatever.
Difo: Ahh! What a beautiful day it is today!
Kale: Dude, it's raining.
Difo: Yes... umm... Well no one cares much about the weather anyways!
Mino: Oh good, the bus is here.
Difo: So that's what you've been standing around here for! I just thought you wanted to talk to me.
Kale: Right...
Vixo: Ha ha ha! I umm... uhh... Welcome to North Eagle Bus Services, I will be your driver today. Enter at your own risk...
Difo: Oh boy! I love busses!
Kale: I hope the seats are clean. Because a dirty seat is like, yuck!
Vixo: North Eagle Bus Services is not responsible for any death and/or injuries that will occur on this ride. Now get on before I slam your face in the door!
Kale: Don't be so stuck up!
Vixo: No! I will be stuck up!
Mino: Is that you, Vixo?
Vixo: (gasp) How did you recognize me?!
Mino: Your name tag.
Hello, my name is: Vixo
Vixo: Drats! Curse this neighborly company!
Kale: You again? You tried to kill Pury, and that's a no no.
Pury: He didn't mean to attack me. It was an accident.
Mino: What are you doing here?
Pury: I always take the bus to work so that I can get there early to please my boss.
Zuby: I just take the bus because I can sleep while riding. Actually, I'm not even going anywhere. I just like the scenery as it passes by. Kinda like television, except without the guilt of not going anywhere.
Kale: Whatever...
Vixo: Please be seated. Our next stop will be, you're grave! Oops, I mean... umm... George Town.
Difo: Oh boy, I love gravy! It's so good on Jell-O!
Zuby: Gravy?
Difo: What about it? I was talking about gravity.
Zuby: (yawn)
Mino: What are you up to, Vixo?
Vixo: Please, don't bother me while I'm driving... you might make me swerve and crash the bus. Funny, right now all of your lives are in my hands.
Mino: Your neck is going to be in my hands if you don't stop acting so sinister!
Pury: People, people! There's no need to be hostile.
Kale: Like, ya! How can there be world peace when we can't even treat ourselves properly?
Pury: Each other.
Kale: What?
Pury: You said that there can't be world peace if we treat ourselves improperly, but you really should have said that there can't be world peace if we treat each other improperly.
Kale: That's not what I said at all... and quit correcting me!
Pury: No no, it's 'stop correcting me.'
Kale: AHH!!! STOP CORRECTING ME!!!
Pury: That's much better! But let's try to use our indoor voices, please.
Zuby: Yes! I can't sleep with all you guys yelling like this.
Vixo: We're here!
Difo: Gravy?
Vixo: No! Just be quiet for a second while I order some things.
Drive through guy: Welcome to Bob's Big House O' Weapons. How may I take your order?
Vixo: Yeah, I'd like umm... two missile launchers, some mines, three machine-gun turrets, and some kind of grenade launcher.
Drive through guy: Let me see if I got this right. Did you order, two missile launchers, some mines, three machine-gun turrets, and some kind of grenade launcher?
Vixo: Yep!
Drive through guy: And would you like that all mounted on your bus?
Vixo: Yes please.
Drive through guy: We do have a special on laser blasters today. Are you interested?
Vixo: No thanks. I only have $12,000 on me.
Drive through guy: Please pull forward to the next window.
Difo: Did you get me the bacon-burger?
Mino: So, you plan to fix this bus up with some weapons do you?
Difo: No. I just wanted something to eat.
Vixo: Shut up!
Mino: So what's your plan? Hold us hostage while you destroy the white house?
Vixo: No! But that is a good idea. I think I'll do that instead of my first plan.
Difo: What was your first plan?
Vixo: Blow stuff up for fun.
Kale: Don't be such a pyro.
Drive through guy: That's everything! Have a nice day!
Vixo: Thanks.
Mino: Guys, we have to stop Vixo before he does something bad.
Pury: Does this mean that I'm not getting to work on time?
Kale: Yeah like, totally! Blowing up the White House is soooo not cool.
Mino: Great. Now you guys distract Vixo while I sneak up on him and knock him out.
Pury: Do you have to knock him out? Let's try not to use any unnecessary violence now.
Difo: I have the perfect idea. Hey Vixo.
Vixo: What?
Stomp!
Vixo: AHH! My foot! You idiot! Why did you stomp on my foot?!
Difo: Hey! How was I supposed to know that you had your foot in your shoe?
Vixo: Where else did you think I was keeping it?
Difo: I don't know. It kinda baffled me.
Vixo: Well go sit down and be quiet!
Difo: But I do hate being quiet. It's so boring! I mean, what can you do while being quiet? You can't yell at the top of your lungs. You can't play the saxophone, you can pull someone's ears and laugh as they scream-
Vixo: Just sit down then!
Difo: Oh okay! Why didn't you say so?
Mino: Take this!
Vixo: Ouch!! Why did you punch me?!
Mino: You were supposed to be knocked out.
Vixo: This isn't the movies! Now the first thing I do when I take over the world will be to have you sent to prison.
Mino: For what?
Vixo: For punching the king of the world, of course!
Mino: Well then, I guess you'll have to double my prison sentence.
Vixo: Why?
Punch!
Kale: Cool, he's out cold! But umm... uhh... who's like umm... driving the bus now?
Difo: Vixo is driving the bus, silly. But he's doing a really bad job at it. He should have his license checked.
Pury: Oh no! We're heading straight for a cliff!
Kale: AHH! I'm too young and beautiful to die!
Zuby: Will you guys be quiet? I'm trying to sleep over here.
Pury: Mino, you're the only one who can save us!
Mino: Why me? Everyone here has a driver's license... except for Kale and Zuby.
Kale: Wrong! I got my license two days ago! I look like I'm about to sneeze in the picture though.
Difo: Wait a minute! Picture? Sneeze? Zuby? Drivers?... About?
Mino: What is it Difo?
Difo: I think Jell-O in my pocket has melted.
Kale: GUYS!!!
Mino: Oh yeah. Hold on.
Pury: We're going to crash!
Mino: I just need to stop the bus... There!
Kale: Whew!
Difo: Jell-O isn't the only liquid in my pants now... I had chocolate in the other pocket that melted too.
Vixo: Oh man... what happened? Hey. Why are we stopped? Better floor the gas then.
Mino: NOOO!
CRASH!
Pury: Oh man! Now this nice shiny bus has crashed into a vertical wall of rock.
The person reading this story: WHAT?! They were at the bottom of the cliff and not the top?!
Zuby: Well duh!
Difo: Duh about what? Am I talking to myself again?
Zuby: Never mind.
Bus Radio: This is North Eagle calling bus number 535-6, why haven't you arrived at George Town yet?
Vixo: Well umm... funny story actually. Have you ever tried to take over the world?
Bus Radio: Did you crash a bus again?
Vixo: NO! Well, yes actually. But I was knocked out first!
Bus Radio: This isn't the movies. Now get back to the station and report to my office. You're fired.
Vixo: What?! I can't be fired! Don't you know who you're talking to?
Bus Radio: Cut the evil genius crap and get back here!
Vixo: GEERR! When I'm king of the world, I'm going to put you in prison for firing me!
Bus Radio: Whatever.
Difo: Well, since we're all here, let's chat!
Kale: Actually, I would rather go outside and try to find my way home through this horrible rain.
Difo: And people say that I'm weird!