"You don't understand," I turned slightly. " You will never understand. I'm sorry"

I turned back to the window. I didn't see the view, for tears blurred it. I knew I was destroying my only chance for peace… happiness… love. This was the one I had waited for and the only one I could never have. I hated the Shikaron, as I had never before; they asked so many things of me, why could they not give me this? By now, the tears flowed freely. I knew that if I looked at him now I would give in to my heart and that would kill us both.

"Just go—please, just go." I choked out the words. " I don't want to ever see you again. I will kill you if I do."

I covered my mouth with my hand as I vainly tried to suppress the sobs that would soon wrack my body; my throat ached with the effort. I was fighting a losing battle with tears.

"GO!! Are you deaf?! I don't want you here! I hate you! Never come near me again!" I screamed. I was now gripping the windowsill as if to crush it. I continued in a more subdued tone, "please—please, go—you have to—you have to go now before it's to late."

I felt him turn to leave.

"I will come back someday. I promise."

"NO!! You still don't understand! You can't! I will kill you!!" I could feel the iron start to bend in my death grip.

"No. You will not." With that, he left, and I collapsed to the floor sobbing as if I would never stop.

My heart was broken—no, it had been ripped apart by the Shikaron.

I would never forget.