Fear

The wind was blowing, beating against the window like a hammer pounding nails. A storm was approaching this I was sure of as I laid in my bed restless, I couldn't help but to ponder dreadful thoughts. Pointless as they are nevertheless I pondered, like when we die where do we go? To Heaven or Hell? To a black void of nothingness? Or are we reincarnated? Too many theories with too few answers, which only leaves it to the imagination thus having endless possibilities. It is illogical for one to say where we'll go in the end, but 'to each his own' I suppose. One cannot change another's perspective, and we should have the common decency to mind our manners. But instead one's beliefs are always right therefore everyone else is wrong, and they try to force their beliefs upon us.

I heard a clap of bone-chilling thunder and a flash of lightning lit my room sending a cold shiver down my spine. The wind was blowing even harder. The branches were scratching against the window against, which was unbearable to hear I tried to tone it out, but to no avail, then I put my headphones on and I still heard it.

Who's to say they're right or wrong? Surely not me because I probably believe in something different, which brings me to my next point: churches are always trying to get people to believe in their God. If one refuses their God to them you'll be tormented in unfathomable pain, and burn in fiery pits for eternal damnation, which of course is highly disagreeable. Why is it that people must follow the beliefs of others? My opinion as to why people resort to Christianity is for this mere fact that fear consumes them, and that they can't handle that when they die there's nothing afterward. Then again, there could be something, however, I can't be one hundred percent positive as to life after death.

I couldn't stop myself from staring out the window. There seem to be a shadowy figure standing outside, which of course is impossible for no one was allowed here after nine o'clock. The flashes of lightning quickened and that is when I saw something, but it must be a delusion… my mind playing a game with me for the shadowy figure disappeared.

Indeed, some believe Death is the one who takes us to Limbo at the hour of our demise, but then again, I can't say that is true, merely because I do not know everything. And what I do know could be perceived as little intelligence, but I won't argue with them because they are entitled to their own opinion. It is for others to judge whether or not I have intelligence because one person's words alone isn't always right.

The reason I bring this to your attention is because I fear death. For the simple fact that I am suffocated nightly by dreadful thoughts. Like everything else, life has a beginning and an end. Where do we go when our lives come to its inevitable last breath?! My sanity diminished and a craze overwhelmed me. I cannot live life without knowing what happens to me upon my departure from the living, and that is why some think me to be mad. It's simple question with a unreasonable answers, and when my insanity emerged I was sent here to: Saint Rosemary's Mental Institution.