"I don't have a problem

"I don't have a problem."


7 pm

you're all jittery and twitchy

Giggling over everything,

But still you're claiming

"I'm not on anything, I'm not on anything,"

Every statement repeated twice like that,

And followed by fits of laugher.

"I like to have fun."

Do you?

A few hours later

Back in our apartment, collapsed on the floor

Sobbing so hard your body is shaking

I hold your hand.

I say, "It's okay."

"You're exaggerating."

Am I?

You quiet down

You sit up, you're back against the wall

Knees in your chest,

You whisper to me,

"I want to die. Kill me."'

But I don't have to.

You're already killing yourself.