I
feel like it's all finally breaking,
And I have no control,
Yet
it's all on me,
I don't know where to go.
I
love the way I loved you,
I love the way you care,
I love the
way you hold me,
And when you stroke my hair.
Everything
has an ending,
But I don't want this to be one,
This is like
our hugs,
That I cannot let go of.
It's
like a rug or closet,
Which holds in dirty secrets,
Secrets I
can't keep,
I'm too honest and meek.
"Good-bye
may seem forever,
Farewell is like like the end,
But in my
hearts a memory,
And there you'll always be."
I
don't want this to end,
But I don't know where to go,
Our love
is like a fork in the road,
And I don't know which way to go.
Right
takes me to you,
Back inside your heart,
Back to all our
memories,
I want to keep them all in tact.
Left
will take me away,
To a place I'm not and am unfamiliar,
With
new people, old emotions,
But I don't want to hurt you, either.
And
now, I can't stop crying,
I just feel so confused,
Everything's
so blurry,
I wish I could see you.
But
all at the same time,
I wish to be far away,
Where no one on
earth could see me,
But I want to touch your face.
I'll
always be the bad guy,
I'll never make you happy,
I'll
constantly leave you insecure,
I want someone to slap me.
All
I want from you,
Is a smile upon your face,
I don't really know
if I can make it be there anymore,
While I'm in my current state.
Before
this calamity,
The last time that I cried,
Was when I was away
from you,
Locked up for suicide.
And
that's exactly what this is,
A "suicide" of sorts,
I'm
killing myself so quickly,
I'm stumbling over words.
I
don't want to cause pain,
To anyone I know,
But I realize in
the end,
Someone's going to go.
And
now I feel so sick,
Deep, deep down inside,
I want to slice
away,
These teardrops in my eyes.
I
want to make you happy,
Like we used to be,
But right now I
just can't,
Not in the same way.
I
know the reason is,
Because of how I'm feeling,
But baby, I
can't help it,
I need
anything to
help me.
I
cannot promise much,
Hardly anything,
I'll say it once
again,
To hurt you would be killing.
"Good-bye
may seem forever,
Farewell is like the end,
But in my hearts a
memory,
And there, you'll always be."
If
there is a God,
Please, just help me through this,
I want those
memories,
To come back and to flourish.
This
is not good-bye,
It's simply how I'm feeling,
Which is only so
confused,
That I cannot do my biddings.
I
love you, as I did,
Simply not the same,
Everything's so
wrong,
And only I'm to blame.
Yes,
in my heart are memories,
And there, you will
always be,
That
I can promise you.
I'll
always feel the love,
That I once had for you,
But once again,
in memories,
I want it to come back so soon.
I
don't want to hurt you,
I want all the love to return,
I want
you to smile,
And I want to only learn to fix this problem.
:
The quoted text is from The Fox and the Hound, I do not own those parts of the poem