I want to be a different person,

I want to be a different person,
Look through another's eyes,
I want to be the perfect soldier,
And live my fucking lie.

I want to be what you always wanted,
Everything you could ever adore,
I want to be your perfect dream,
But, I'm afraid that chapter has already ended.

I need to tear apart these walls,
I need to simply cry,
But, I'm the perfect soldier,
And I can't just lay down and die.

I want to know my place,
I want to know my reason,
I just want escape,
Yet, life, I want to keep it.

Pushed against a wall,
Forced fed all this nonsense,
Pushed against a wall,
Losing all I ever knew.

Well, I can make my way through this maze,
While being totally lost,
And I can make it through your gaze,
Though your eyes put me in thought.

This should have never happened,
It wasn't meant to be,
Why did I fall so far,
In love so easily?

Screaming at myself,
Asking for an answer,
And all that I get,
Is voices with contradicting answers.

I'd kill for one more second with you,
I'd die to save your life,
Because I am a soldier,
And believe in sacrifice.

Cut me open one more time,
And scream to me,
How your feeling inside,
Just to put me in my place.

I died in your arms the last time you held me,
I cried through my wrist the last time you rejected me.

But, I can't dwell on this,
I have to move along,
Because I'm the soldier,
And I must remain strong.

But, I'm breaking,
Recreating,
All the memories,
All the remorse.

I could be your hero,
And lead you to a place,
But end up being evil,
And cover it with lace.

Please, take me forgranted,
It's what you're supposed to do,
Please, take me as a joke,
That's all that I am.

Yes, I am the perfect soldier,
But nothing ever else,
I ruined what we had,
And in ammo I now dwell.