I'm
just a little girl,
And now, I'm just so scared,
I cannot stop
the shaking,
And my thoughts leave me in fear.
I know that
I have problems,
More than most kids do,
Sometimes, it's hard
to sleep,
And my dreams, they scare me, too.
The voices
keep on yelling,
And I can't drown them out,
My arms just keep
on shaking,
And you can't calm me down.
My legs are all cut
up,
And I'm rocking back and forth,
I now repeat my
sentences,
To make sure I am heard.
My face just stays so
blank,
And the lights, they shine so bright,
Would you turn
them down?
You know they hurt my eyes.
And, when things
move really slow,
It's hard to keep my tracks,
But me, well I
walk fast,
For you won't give me slack.
Right now, I can't
feel happy,
Or anything at all,
I don't really want too
much,
Just a little self-control.
Big things don't really
matter,
To me much anymore,
Except when people hurt my
feelings,
By saying dirty words.
I suddenly get angry,
At
things that shouldn't hurt,
But I don't have the strenght,
To
fix the things so wrong.
Sometimes I want to end,
This
curse they call my life,
It would be a dream,
To wake up and
have died.
I feel so isolated,
From things I used to
love,
I feel so anti-social,
Towards people once so close.
My
moods just keep on changing,
I can't make up my mind.
Sometimes,
I feel so bad,
Like I have done a crime.
So, please, just
let me think,
And free my mind in prison,
I'll just replay my
thoughts,
And speak in fractured sentence.
Sometimes I just
walk,
And my legs, they take me nowhere,
I don't have much
direction,
And my goals are much less than fair.
My
insight's gone astray,
I'm not sure where to go now,
My
thoughts just keep on racing,
And I cannot concentrate now.
I
make up my own words,
Because your's cannot describe me,
But I
always seem to forget them,
My memory's so foggy.
My logic
makes no sense,
To people who aren't me,
And the things you
call so simple,
Make me want to scream.
I know they're out
to get me,
And they know just what I'm thinking,
My mind is
blocking out now,
I don't know what I'm saying.
Inside it
is so loud,
And I'm getting very frightened,
Friends hold me
close and tell me,
That I have the strenght to fight it.
And
all of these sick symptoms,
Leave me knowing something,
No
matter what they diagnose,
I know the disease is inside me.