I fiddle with my fingers
Then move them along the fragile folds of my dress
Shivering and anxious to be accepted
Such an abstract and alien feeling to a body like me
Drenched in self worth and self words
My bony confidence that so often slivers off my shoulders
And rolls across my spine accumulating
Until it falls from the backs of my calves into my footprints
It drowns in my depth though its lungs are inept
For they hardly exist at all
If even

Where I walk is beautiful
Or so they say
But lately the gravel has been slightly choking
And I'm hoping it's just a phase
Like something inane that won't matter
Even if I fail
Falling from my apple trees and rooftops
Into the juicy dry of unripe asphalt
It's no one's fault of course
Though I wish I could find this No-One Everyone speaks of
They're so good at hide and seek though
So I'll just camp out by the window rooted to the carpet
Not pretty-pattering along the streets
So all of me would corrupt the ugly faces people paint there
I'll just stay here

My hips are falling
Sprawling themselves away from my legs
Saying they want to be their own entity
Happily weaving themselves around and between
Anything and everything
Singing songs to sticks and stones
Bones and noises tiled all across their waves
But I persuade them
Stay and hide beneath my skin
And keep your quiet sins within me
Ringing in my body like a selfish child whining
This way when they break you you'll be safe
Tucked away
With flesh clinging to your movements
Drinking in your callous dance
And bone shaped legs to keep you caged
Away from temptation and
The like

But perhaps if you stay you'll find something else
A little sweeter than your handmade hell
Like lilac scented summers tipped in raspberry grasses
And glasses of iced tea running through you
So you can too share time with my ankles

But only if you'd like to stay
I say

Not with my lips and my hips respond
Fondling my body once more
I'm sore but it's all right
I sigh and remember my fingers
Mumbling something upon my dress with fluency denied to me
Most of the time
I unbutton the pearly beads
Divorcing them from the slits in the fabric
Until they scream at me for it
But I don't listen I leave
In skin the shade of grapefruit seed
Limbs weeding between walls
Crawling across windowsills and hills
Pillows piled high upon an empty bed
I see you making love to sleep that's stuck between your teeth
Waiting for the knowing that glows into the sheets
And fingers laced inside your bones I creep into the cracks
Hoping loneliness will fade back into the crumpled clothes I killed
Reborn and filled with stains and painful glances
At void hallucinations grasped inside my fists
I kiss

But my naked knees and elbows remain alone
Until dust coats me like winter clothes
And life is bloated in monotone