"Just act natural"
is what she says to herself.
But how do you act natural
when you can't breathe
when you can't sleep
when you can't eat
and your world is
crashing down around you
and all you want
is to be left alone
but they don't trust you
They don't trust you not to
hang yourself with a necktie
or cut to bleed out
or smother yourself with a pillow
all of which are things
you never plan on doing.
And they now have to "check"
for new scars every week.
And all you want is some privacy
not to play
a morbid "Twenty Questions" game
not to have to strip so
they know you've stopped.
But most of all
all you want is for things to go
back to how they were