Journal:

I messed up. I should have waited for her, but my head told me she wasn't coming back, even if my heart wanted to wait. I should have stayed away from Callie. Callie is why Missy's gone.

When I came home from the movies with my new girlfriend Callie, I found a note on my doorstep in Missy's handwriting. My heart sank. I knew she'd been by here. I knew she'd gotten my note about Callie. I knew she'd left for Chicago again too.

As soon as I saw the note, I knew she'd come back for me, only to find me gone. I felt awful. I feel awful. How could I have done this to Missy? The sweet, gentle Missy I got to know when she was here is probably gone now, replaced again by the strong Missy I knew in grade school. The one that showed nothing to anyone. The one whose strength was her only defense.

And with me gone from her life, I knew she wouldn't have much strength left to hide behind.

I could have waited two years fort her. Why didn't I?