Written on 27 July 2008
By: Lana AKA FantasyIssue
With a type of determination that couldn't be let up, he raced through the crowds. He needed to see her, needed to find a way to get her. It tore in his chest, knowing that she was probably alone and hurting. He hadn't meant to leave her, never did mean to leave her each time he did. He didn't want to believe that everything he'd worked so hard for was over. He came with mistakes, knowing of his own arrogance and ignorance, but he came with his own personal super powers. Sarah had even told him: "You're like my own personal Superman with your super senses, always knowing when I need you."
The crowds in the clubs were thick that night. Chase wasn't used to being in the tightly packed rooms with the beats sinking into his bones. He never enjoyed dancing or partying much, but he knew that she did. She'd always loved singing and dancing whenever she could. The thought of Sarah's free spirit made him smile, the skin of his lips tugging upwards into his infamous megawatt grin.
"Have you seen Sarah?" Chase asked the bartender, knowing that the large burly man behind the counter might have an idea of where the young woman might be that night.
"Chase, my man! I may be Sarah's brother, but I don't keep tabs on her all of the time," the bartender said, whipping clean a glass with a damp towel. Chase sighed in frustration, it was the third club that night and he still couldn't find her. "I'll tell you this, she didn't leave town. She's bound to be somewhere."
"Thanks, Rich," Chase mumbled, leaving the large club as quickly as the crowds of people and his feet would allow him. He was tired beyond belief, but he had to find Sarah. The knowledge that he probably wouldn't be able to find her made him even more determined. As much as it hurt him to admit it, he was dependent on her.
"Chase, who are you looking at?" Sarah asked, taking Chase out of his thoughts. His pocket felt heavy with the ring inside of it. Did he really want to put the damned thing in her dessert? He worried that she'd swallow or even choke on it.
"No one, honey," he smiled, taking a sip of his wine. It was a late dinner, but the couple always had late dinners at Juliano's. Neither of them worked healthy hours, but it was okay for them. Chase found their relationship to be the best that he'd ever had. Sarah found the relationship to be like any other relationship, but she had the feeling that things would be different. Actually, she just wished that everything would be different because Chase was such a good guy.
"I don't believe you," she said. Sarah had the harboring feeling that Chase wasn't tell her something that night. Or that he was going to drop a bomb on her. She didn't know if she could deal with what was going to be told to her.
"Sarah, believe me, I wasn't looking at anyone," Chase said, almost begging. He wasn't stupid, he knew what Sarah was thinking. He knew that she thought he was staring at other women, sleeping with other women. He couldn't understand why she wouldn't trust him. Maybe he'd just let the ring sit in his pocket for another month. Without trust, how could she even want to marry him? Albeit the idea was stupid, Chase knew that if he popped the question she'd most definitely say yes. His luck couldn't be so bad that she'd deny him in front of so many people.
"Let's just eat. Your flight is soon," she said quickly, picking up her fork and indulging herself in the pasta she'd ordered. Chase sighed and nodded, also pick up his fork. The food was good a Juliano's but Chase couldn't bring himself to enjoy it. The taste seemed bland that night, and he couldn't understand why he couldn't just enjoy the food. He tried to concentrate on the taste, but it only made him want to gag. Something was off that night.
The two sat for almost half an hour in completely silence. Neither one looked up from their foods. Even the waiting staff knew that something was wrong with the young couple.
"Check please," Chase finally said after they'd finished dessert. It was a fast dinner, and Chase couldn't help but look at the room. Other couples sat further away, conversing happily. It was a woman at the bar that caught his eye. She seemed to be fighting with the man next to her. Turning back, Sarah glared at Chase accusingly.
"Chase," Sarah stated like a warning.
"Please, let's not leave on a bad note," Chase begged. "I love you, isn't that enough for you?" Sarah just continued to glare at him. She could feel her brain working. Swarms of different emotions rushed through her. She didn't want to be the one to break it off, but she knew it would hurt more if he did it. He loved her, that was for sure, but Sarah was starting to doubt her own words. Did she love him the way she did in the beginning? It'd been almost two years since they'd gotten together. She just wanted to know when he was planning on growing up.
"I'm not going to the airport with you," she said quietly, softening her glare. A mad rush of emotions smacked into Chase's chest. 'Fuck,' he thought. Flashes of dates and wasted time flashed in his mind. Pictures of vacations, parties, Sarah's smile. Everything was just a waste of time to her.
"That's it then?" Chase asked, "We're done then?"
"I'll find my own place to live," Sarah said, not meeting his gaze. "I'll see you around, Chase."
Chase watched as she got up and collected her things. The ring was burning a hole in his pocket. He decided that she might had well known what he was planning. Taking his mother's ring out of his pocket he watched the way the white gold shown in the dim lights of the place.
Sarah's breath caught in her throat. She'd royally fucked up that time. She stopped adjusting her scarf and looked at the ring shining on the table top in front of Chase. His eyes were hidden from her under the fringe of his dark hair. It was his mother's ring. She recognized it from all of the times she'd admired it on the older woman's finger. It was an antique, with a single diamond being the center and smaller ones sparkling in the band. Sarah just looked at the ring. Did he have to take it out? It would have been so much better if she hadn't known, right?
Chase was at the last club that he could think of and he knew that Sarah had to be there. She couldn't not be there. Her best friend had only given him vague details, but Chase was positive that it was a girl's night out. A girl's night out was always on a Friday night, it was always in town, and it was always- ALWAYS- suppose to be easy to find the girls. The last statement was obviously false.
The last club was more of a bar than it was a club. It was called Danny's, and it was one that Chase himself frequented after the break up six days ago. Chase didn't even have the energy to go to the air port, which thus issued voicemail after voicemail from his employer whom complained and threatened to fire him. Chase knew that his job was not on the line- he was the most important employe to the company. Losing him would have the company simultaneously lose half of it's shares. Having him fired would be like setting fire to the company and not calling the fire department. The company would lose everything.
Inside of the bar Chase left his coat where he always left it: on the coat rack under the window just right of the door. There were women from all over town in the bar, which made Chase a little uneasy. He didn't want to speak to Sarah if it meant having all of her lady friends back her up. Weaving his way towards the bar, Chase was greeted with a cold beer waiting for him. Slapping down a five, Chase raised the beer as a thanks to the bartender before walking around the bar. A few men stood by the pool table, speaking in hushed tones and pointing occasionally to one of the women dancing on the small dance floor.
A local band was performing covers, and an idea sparked in Chase's mind. If he could sing and play guitar, which he could, he'd just get up on stage and play a few songs. Sarah would definitely notice him. But the idea was a bust. Chase hadn't sung in three years, hadn't picked up his guitar in one year (since Sarah didn't approve) and hadn't even thought the band (which consisted of teenagers) would allow him to join them. His life wasn't a movie. And suddenly, Chase realized that when he did reach Sarah he had nothing to say. He'd hoped that the ring would say everything for him. Chase was hoping that the wild fire of passion that was once between himself and Sarah would come back to life. He actually pictured Sarah running towards him, apologizing and raining kisses on him.
Chase didn't know why he wanted to marry her or to at least forgive her. Sarah was just there, and had always been there for two years that he thought it was the correct direction for their relationship. After two years, people either got hitched or got ditched right? Chase finally realized that he had gotten ditched. But the itching feeling caused by his curiosity had him looking for Sarah still. A few people stopped him, friends, and he chatted but he was always scanning the people around him for Sarah.
Chase's new plan that night was just to see her, to make sure that she was safe. And possibly speak to her, take her home to the apartment they once shared, and then marry her. But he'd have to settle for the former.
And his wish came true. But nothing came easy. Sitting with a few other people in a red leather booth, Sarah was sitting dangerously close to a man that Chase didn't recognize. The man was speaking to her, bringing his face closer to hers. Chase wanted to gag, cry and scream at the same time. The possessiveness in him tore through his chest when he stopped his conversation with a friend to see Sarah leans towards the mystery man. Chase's breathing came out painfully and soon didn't as he held his breath. He watched as Sarah closed her eyes and brought her lips to the man's for a kiss, but didn't receive one. Chase almost cheered when the man had pulled back, but wanted to crush the man too. Sarah wasn't one to deny- she was someone that should have always been pleased. Sarah was a queen, a princess; she wasn't just some tramp in a bar. And it killed Chase to see her lean in again, only to receive her kiss. Chase let out his breath and left the bar immediately.
Sarah had definitely seen him watching her. Chase didn't bother to go to the apartment that night. Instead he went to his parents' house to return his mother's engagement ring.
"Thanks, but I don't think I need it Mom," Chase said, placing the ring in his mother's hand. The older woman looked at the ring in her palm and sighed. "Things aren't going to work out."
"Are you okay with that?" She asked her only son. She'd never seen him so crushed.
"Maybe later," Chase admitted, "But life isn't a movie or a book right?"
Chase let in a deep breath when he turned around and found that Sarah wasn't standing in the street waiting for him. He'd have to move on, whether he wanted to or not.