Save Me


I was in the school bathroom when it happened.
I was alone,
It always happens when I am alone.
When no one is there to set me straight,
No one is there to yell at me,
To tell me that I'm stupid.

The burning in my stomach becomes insane,
It becomes unbearable,
And the memories come back.
The memories of hate,
The hate that others feel towards me,
The hate I feel for myself.

I do the only thing that comes to mind,
The only thing that makes the aching pain disappear.
I take the razor to my skin;
And cut deep letting the blood flow,
Letting the pain vacate my body.

I place my hand in the sink of running water;
Letting the water wash away the hurt,
But then the feeling of betrayal sets in.
The betrayal of myself,
And tears begin fall down my face.

How can I do this to myself?
I know that I shouldn't.
I know that it's wrong.
I want help.
But I'm afraid,
I'm afraid that no one will help me,
That no one cares.

Because no one does care,
I am alone in this world.
I have never felt love.
I have never been in love.

I feel faint.
Have I finally gone past the unspoken limit?
I can't feel my arm,
My gaze is fading,
I can not see.

I hear screams.
They echo in the small bathroom,
I want to cover my ears,
I want to keep the screams away.

But they won't go away,
They won't stop,
I can't have peace.
The screams are holding me back,
Keeping me from the light,
The light that's calling to me.

Someone is shaking me.

Telling me that I have to wake up,
Yelling at me.
Does this person care?
Do they care enough to save me from my fate?
Will they save me from this hell?

Tears are constant on my face,
I feel the hands on my shoulders shake me.
My mouth moves but can the person hear me?
The soft word help escapes my lips,
But that's all I can do before the darkness takes over.

Is it too late?
Am I gone?



Well? I know it might have a little to much repeating in there - and I'm working on that. I'm not perfect though... Tell me what you think about it? I think this could possibly be a memory of Hope's from when she was in juvie... Maybe... And the person who saves her is Shawn? Hmm.

- Andie