101 to 100

In 2 hours and 46 minutes I will be 13. When my electric waterproof watch beeps and shines a pale green-in 2 hours and 45 minutes-I will be a teenager. I-Anastasia Marvel- will be able to convince myself that all the terrible and selfish things I do will be because I am a teenager. But I still have another 2 hours and 44 minutes.

I live in North Carolina in a very small town right off the coastline. The town is the very definition of small. In the Town of Coastline Sea there is a Piggly Wiggly, a one pump gas station, a one room theater house, and just for excitement they added an antique book store. The population of that town is 101, and half of the town's folk will be kicking the bucket quite soon.

There are 36 kids in the whole town. All of them attend a 3-roomed school. There are three teachers that teach all 12 grades. Right now my 8th grade class is combined with the 7th and 9th grade classes. In my school I am the outcast. I am ignored by all students and teachers. I don't pay any attention in class either, I sit at my desk in the back of the room doodling. If I get bored of doodling I write short stories and poems. Most of my poems and stories involve questions. Why am I the outcast? Why am I not liked? Some of my stories also involve me accepting it. They involve me just accepting it and not questioning.

All of that made my life dull. My life consists of school, homework, the beach at midnight, and sharp seashells covered in blood. The beach is my safe haven; it is that alone time that helps me through. The beach understands me; the beach is filled with salt, sand, water, and my pain.

I will be 13 in 2 hours and 35 minutes. I am sitting at my window watching the moon rise higher in the sky. The stars seem to be duller than normal. Like they have had an exhausting day and don't feel like shining bright. I feel like those stars sometimes but not tonight. Tonight I am ready, ready for anything. 2 hours and 32 minutes till I am 13. I get up from my window sill and start to pace. I twiddled my thumbs then went to draw on my wall. Why wont time hurry up?

I stop drawing and lay on my bed. I pulled out my Ipod from under my pillow and turned it on full blast. The screaming filled me and relaxed me into a small daydream. I daydream that I am walking on water. The water is pitch black and calm. No waves are coming just flat water that stretches on for miles. The song changes and the water switches. It swirls around me and swallows me down. I feel it all around me the cold ice of it chills me. The water changes it changes into flesh. It changes into human hands that hug me. I scream and struggle to free myself.

I flutter my eyes open and realized that I had fallen asleep. I glance at my watch and see that it is 31 minutes till I am 13. I slide my way out of my bed and head over to my closet. I pull out a small black dress. It comes down to my knees. It fits me perfectly until it puffs out at the waste. I tug it over me and reach for my black flip flops. I walk toward my bathroom, 25 minutes; I brush my teeth and my hair. I open my window and slide out. I pace my way down my roof and then slide down the drain pipe. I brush my dress off and heads toward the beach. 20 minutes. I walk slowly toward the beach and let the smell hit me one bone at a time. I smell that salty dewy smell that invites me. I get closer and hear the crashing of the waves and the wisps of the sand brushing my feet. I am home

18 minutes. I slip my flip flops off and make my way down the sand dune. I reach the bottom and sink into the cold sand. I close my eyes and inhale. I open my eyes and look at the ocean. The waves curl up and smash down. The sand flows up and then slowly floats back down. The moon shines over the black water and it reflects off the surface. 14 minutes. I make my way down to the where the sand meets the water. I stand a few feet away and stare into the ocean.

10 minutes. I start to think to past the minutes. I think to myself why I am here standing at the beach so close to midnight. I want to be on the beach so I can scream. I convinced myself that a while ago. I convinced myself that when I turn 13 I want to scream. I want to scream and let it all out without being heard. The crashing of the waves should cover my scream.

Its 11:55. I walk a bit closer to the sand and it begins to harden under my feet. 11:56. I walk close enough to let the foam brush the tips of my toes. 11:57. I walk ankle deep into the water and let myself sink in. 11:58. I walk knee deep into the water. The waves are pulling me more and it's harder to stay upright. The hem of my dress is sticking to my knees. 11:59. A wave rears up on hind legs and crashes right on top of me. It shatters every bone in my body and kills me inside. The ocean pulls me in, the water circles around me, welcoming me into its watery depths. The water sends me back up I break through the surface and gasp for air. I'm pulled back down as if I was shoved. The air leaves my mouth and I know I am lost. I cant see or here anything except my heart beat. I hear a small beep and see a pale green light beside me. My hand floats up. Its 12:01. I open my mouth and scream. Water rushes into me and fills me. I do not struggle I accept it. I do not question.

I am finally 13. I am a teenager. I can finally convince myself that all the terrible and selfish things I do are because I am a teenager.

There is a small town in North Carolina called Coastline Sea. It has a Piggly Wiggly, a one pump gas station, a one room theater house, and a antique book store. The school has 3 rooms, The 3 teachers teach all 12 grades. The population of Coastline Sea is 100.