"And what exactly is that?" asked Julia. I raised one eyebrow at her- or tried to at least- to show her that I thought her question had no merit whatsoever. In other words, completely stupid.

"It's," I said, dragging the words across my tongue, " a trench coat." I gestured to it to emphasize my words. It was a thing of beauty. Absolute beauty. It was made of dark gray silk and other naturally occurring fibers or something. I'm pretty sure. At least that's what the saleswoman told me. But then again, it was 200 dollars and she probably gets paid by commission...

I quickly banished those thoughts from my head. I mean when you look this good who cares anyway? That's right. No one.

Julia burst out laughing. I felt a twinge of annoyance. I wasn't the one who didn't know what a trench coat was, after all. "Who do you think you are?" Julia managed to sputter out during the brief few seconds when, you know, she wasn't laughing her ass off at me. "Humphrey Bogart, or something?" I felt my face start to heat up.

Unfortunately, Julia noticed this. "Oh my God! You did. You so totally did. That's classic, Kate."

"I want you to leave now," I said making my words like ice. Julia didn't notice this either. "Yeah, yeah. I'm going, I'm going." She sounded so giddy that she probably didn't realize that I was planning her death right now.

I heard Julia's footsteps as she left my room and ran down the stairs to the kitchen. I waited to hear the door open and for her to leave, but there was only silence. I left my room and looked down to the first landing. There was Julia.

"Sorry, Kate. I forgot something." I brightened instantly. Julia was going to apologize. She was going to say that my trench coat looked great and probably say that if I wanted to look like some guy from old black and white movies, well that was my own choice to make.

"Just don't buy a fedora, okay." Wait. What? With that she ran down the remaining stairs and out of the house. I stood there for a few minutes completely stunned. I made my way back into my room. I couldn't believe it- she hadn't begged for forgiveness.

The absolute nerve of some people.

I opened my closet door and took out a box. Laying inside was the most adorable hat that has ever existed. And okay, maybe it was a little fedora-ish. I placed it on my hair and arranged my dark curls just so...

I looked great-contrary to what Julia believed, fedoras are so in right now.

And, you know, if I did get presented with a mystery to solve, I'd so totally be ready.