The Scheme

I'd like to change your mind, my dear; I'd like to change your mind

About the ugly fight we had, about the things you said

No greater remedy for pain could one possibly find!


You came home late this evening, so, to prove I'm not unkind,

I calmly sneak behind you and I kiss your graying head

I'm sorry you don't like it, dear; I hope you change your mind.


You're off to sleep so soon, my love? Oh no, I do not mind!

I'll aid you in your dozing off with this pipe made of lead!

No greater cure for drowsiness could one possibly find!


I drag your body down the hall; your hands and feet I bind

I stab you with so many knives; watch you awake in dread

As you realize the violence that changed your feeble mind.


And by that time, it's far too late! You're surely bound to find

That you know nothing as your blood is staining sheet and bed

A cure for infidelity; the best that one could find

I hope it drives you mad, you cur! I hope it changed your mind!