in your iron embrace

I am a wilted rose

crumbling softly under

your heavy, labored breaths


with glassy eyes

I see right through you

into the walls of your yellowing apartment

that always smells musty

like mothballs and the hanging capes of animal flesh

that a "normal" person would call fur coats


I can feel you now

(on top of me, inside of me)

invading all of my emptiness

with your tongue and unmentionable organs


your fingers crush my vestigial wings

as you climax and nestle your head into my hair

breathing, whispering, screaming

my name, dirtying it

making the once beautiful letters and syllables

into a pornographic mantra

dripping with innuendo and sweat


I am silent,

a stone angel deteriorating

under the acid rain of your semen and spit

it eats me away from the inside

much like the worry nagging at my mother's intestines

when she knows that I am with you

(when she knows that you have caged me)


I think that you are the devil

wrapped in lean muscles and olive-skin

with jade eyes and a lovely smile as crooked

as your morals


I loved you once

before you became this

human animal

with nothing but hungry, predatory eyes

and an insatiable sex drive


and

sometimes I wonder why I let this happen

and sometimes I wish that you'd set me free

I knew that I was losing myself to you

the very first time that you raped me


10.9.08