"So class, today we're going to discuss how certain diseases can be contacted." the heath teacher announced. I let out a long , deep sigh as she passed out a series of papers that asked various questions. I hated sex ed. It was a long, pointless class, that nobody ever really intended to listen to anyway. Even the teachers knew it. They all knew who was having sex with who and that nothing they said would stop them."Fill these papers out and then turn them in when your done. If you have any questions don't be afraid to raise your hand and ask me. Nobody will see your anwsers, this test is completly confidential." she instructed, placing a stray piece of her hair behind her ear.I looked carefully at the paper infront of me and began to fill it out.
Name: Crissa Veltrix
1. Are you or have you ever been pregnant? No
2.Are you currently in a relationship? No
3. Are you, or have you ever been sexually active?
I paused to think of the correct answer to that question. Last year, when I was a freshman in hihschool I was dating this junior named Jacob Johnson. He was a football player and everyone called him J.J. He asked me out within the first 2 weeks of school which suprised everyone. Nobody understood why he'd date a freshman. Neither could I, but when we started dating he began asking me if I'd have sex with him. I kept telling him no, but adventually he got tired of arguing so he raped me. How was I supposed to explain that to a teacher?
The teacher, Mrs L., looked at me for a minute. I was used to people staring after all I was one of the school's 'goth' kids. It was another reason nobody understood why J.J would ask me out. Today I was wearing Nightmare before Christmas hoodie, tight black jeans, and my favorite vans shoes.
I jotted down a yes on the test. Then I filled out the rest of the papper and turned it in on a pile by the teacher's desk. When the bell finally ran I sprung from my seat and dodged the teachers dissaproving look as she read my paper. I headed to lunch in a hurry to sit with 'my' people. They still didn't know what happened between me and J.J last year, and they respected me enough not to ask.
I sat down and put my binder infron of me on the table. I didn't eat lunch. . . . ever. In fact I haven't had a real meal since J.J had raped me. I didn't want to, I liked being thin. Some people say anorexia is a bad thing, but after you start you can never go back. If I was going to start eating decently again then I would gain alot of weight, which would defeat the purpose of me not eating in the first place.
My friends all looked at me, waiting for me to start trash talking the teachers like I usually did. Today I felt differently. I didn't want to dis people, I wanted to curl up into a little ball and forgett J.J ever existed. Today had only been the first day of sex ed. and I could already feel my brain shutting down.
"Hey Erica," I said nudging one of my friends in the side. She laughed at my touch, Erica was extremly tickilish.
"Hi Crissa. I'm suprised your not complaining about class yet. I'm guessing he's why," she pointed her finger toward the opposite side of the lunch room.
I didnt recognize the person she was pointing at, therefore he must have been new. He was cute and 'our' type. He had on a Led Zeppelin T-shirt and clingy gray jeans. His hair was raven black and went alittle past his earlobe. His bangs had been dyed blonde and both sides of his lip was pierced. I knew Erica would have a huge crush on him, just like she knew I didn't date.
"Yeah right," Nicholas chuckled. Last month he had asked me out and I turned him down. We haven't been as close of friends since. "We all know Chris doesn't go out on dates." Apparently he still had some resentment toward me. I wish he could just understand that I'm afraid to get hurt again.
It took me a while to realize that I was still looking at the new kid. He met my gaze with dark hunter green eyes and smiled. His teeth were so white that they looked bleached. I looked away quickly before my friends noticed.
"Well Crissa you might not be interesten in him, but he's definantly interesten in you. He's staring." Tara piped up. She was one of my old friends and she was sitting across from me from at the table.
"He is not!" I hissed under my breath.
"Fine don't believe me," Tara whispered. I risked looking up again and sighed. Sure enough he was still staring straight back at me. I felt my cheeks turn hot so I put my head down on the lunch table. It had been almost a year since I last blushed. I didn't want to be able to feel anymore, after what J.J had done I went numb, and here I was blushing! It didn't make sence.
The bell rang and everyone began to pile out of the room. I told my friends to leave without me because I needed to get my stuff together. After I had finished I rushed to catch the end of the long line of people still exiting the room.
When I was about to leave the cafateria, some smart ass decided to block my path with his arm. I looked up, it was the new kid.He was already annoying me! The guy was leaning casually againstthe door, probably trying to look cool.
"Move," I said in a really rude voice. I might have been tiny, but I was tuff. Barley anyone could beat me in a fight. I would know, I've been in alot. People don't mess with me.
"Make me," he replied, still looking all relaxed.
"Fine," I said placing my hands on his chest and pushing forward. He staggered back alittle, which made me want to laugh. Whoever he was he looked strong and I had moved him! He was also really tall and semi muscular so I thought it would be a little challenging to get him out of my way.
"In a hurry?" he asked.
"Yeah, my next class is French 2 and it's on the other side of the school." I told him, giving him a fake smile.
"Really? That's my next class too. I'll walk you there," he responded stepping to match my pace.
"You never give up do you?" I questioned, referring to his determinedness in speaking to me.
"Not usually. I'm Spencer by the way. My mom got transferred here from Oregon," he explained.
"My names Crissa," I answered curtly, trying to be rude enough to make him go away. "I've lived here all my life."
"That's cool my mom is working here as a doctor now. My dad is in to writing novels," Spencer announced proudly.
"My mom's dead, my dad's a tweaker, and I work two part time jobs to pay for the lousy apartment me and my dad live in," I was trying to make him feel uncomfortable. I hated whiney rich kids and I was hoping he wasn't one of them. I already knew he lived a better life than me.
"Oh." was all he said back.
"Hey it's no big deal. Really I'm used to it." I answered, hoping I didn't make him feel to bad. I hated people that felt sorry for me. I was proud to be able to take care of myself. I opened the door to the French room. There were only two seats open and they were both sitting beside one another. I regretfully took my seat next to Spencer and took out my text book.
It was second semester so some of the people in class were new.. None of my friends were in here I noticed first glance. I looked again to see if I even knew anybody besided Spencer. I spotted my own personal demon. I cringed back in my seat as J.J gave me one of those evil grins. A sudden wave of hatred and panick hit me. He was back into my life in a sudden burst of an instant. I didn't want Spencer to leave me here alone with him. Even though I didn't know the new guy well, I felt like I could trust him. If Spencer left I'd be alone and as strong as I was I was no match for Jason.