"I still miss you biting me."
"I still miss you biting me."
I walked home that night after my best friends house, analyzing what she had said to me. Grinning because I knew that soon we could finish what we started. I checked the window as I approached the front door of my house. By the look of it, no one was home so I sat and enjoyed the silence. Feeling the cool of the breeze against my face, the smell of the moist air and the crickets chirping. I found myself lost in a daydream; being back at Hannah's and sleeping next to her on her bed. Feeling the warmth and love that she willingly gave to me when she saw I was in trouble. I could see her, smiling at me saying…something..something, what was it?
"I've missed you baby" My eyes shot open. She was gone. But I still felt a warmth surrounding me. I jumped up to my feet and turned to the culprit who so rudely disturbed my peace.
"Jenna?!" I looked down at the small figure smiling up at me. It was a smile I so openly welcomed before when I was apart of Sean's gang. Now I knew to avoid it. "What are you doing here? How did you find me?"
"It's not that hard to find someone when they go to the same school as you." She stood up and approached me, invading my space. I could smell the perfume that I once loved. She only wore it for me before. Silly of her to wear it now.
"What do you want?" I asked, and her smile faded, replaced with a frown. she turned from me and headed to the side of the porch. "It's not Sean or any of the guys is it?" I asked following her, now full of worry. I may have wanted nothing to do with her but if she was in trouble with Sean, we'd both have the same enemy. I had promised to help her out if he got rough with her. "Come on, you can tell me." I said, putting my hand on her shoulder.
In a moment she turned viciously and grabbed me, holding me close to her. I felt her face was wet. She was crying. "What's wrong Jen?"
"It's you!!" those two words hit me like daggers. I just stood still with clear puzzlement displayed on my mug.
"How could it be me?"
"What happened with us? Everything was fine, then you left. And why? Because of some fucking epiphany?!" She pushed me against the wall; pressing me into it. This was it. Moment of truth. Why did she have to come to me with this now? While I felt weak already.
"I told you why Jenna. I couldn't do it anymore. I wasn't happy. None of it was right."
"Ever since that slut came into the picture-"
"Don't you dare talk about Hannah like that! You don't know anything about her!"
"I know she took you from me."
"No she didn't. I made the decision on my own. I went to her." Her mouth snapped shut then and after a moment of silence, she started pacing, wiping her eyes from time to time.
"You said you'd be there for me. Remember? Whatever happens…"
"I can still be there for you."
"You promised me!" She sobbed. the words blurred my vision and I saw her then; saying the exact same thing. The pain that was held in her eyes… It was heartbreaking.
"I'm sorry." I whisper, looking down at my feet in shame.
"We had fun right?" she asked, with a hint of a grin from the old days.
"Yeah, we had fun." I chuckled. The frustration I felt the night before was at bay. If she did anything more, I'd probably accept what she wanted to give.
My jaw was aching, which was one of many of my withdrawals from those nights. I couldn't let her know that I was so vulnerable.
"Your jaw's hurting isn't it?" she stated as I massaged my sore side.
Shit. "I can-"
"Shh." She pulled me towards her and clutched the back of my neck. While my eyes gazed into hers with question. She removed her hair from the side of her neck. My hold on her back tightened as she slowly reclined her neck for me.
I couldn't help but grin. I took her neck and pulled it up to my mouth. One moment and the same shocks I had felt were shooting throughout my body; I was back in Hannah's arms. Her gasp and the sweet sounds that escaped her mouth caused me to bite harder. The effect was burning my senses. I backed her up against the fence and started giving her sweet kisses up and down her delicious skin. Within closed eyes I envision the last nights I had with her. Quenching my sadistic thirst for flesh. Feeling her warmth, her legs entangled with mind. Her short gasps as I moved against her. It was amazing how she fit me so well.
Pulling her closer to me, harder, hearing her breaths getting shorter, all was causing me to lose control. "Hannah-" the words left my mouth before I could think them. Jenna stopped and pulled me off to look at me. I took a deep breath. What was I doing?? Not with Jenna! It's not safe, you know what can happen. "I-I can't do this." I said , looking up her.
Now I had expected her to have a look of disdain but instead, surprisingly, it was understanding.
"Please don't- stay.."
"I can't." I exclaimed letting go of her. My frustration was now overflowing. Before I knew it, she caught my hand and had her mouth on mine before I could mutter an objection. A change occurred then. Her scent, her taste, her touch… it all burned. I pushed her away, disgusted. "I can't"
"Pretend I'm her." she whispered in my ear. Now fuming with anger I backed away, realizing the game she was playing. "Is that all I've ever been to you? Somone to use for you sick-pleasures?!"
"I never used you!"
"You never did after I got smart." The door was close now..
"Ever since you came here you've talked a lot of shit."
"No, you talked shit ever since I met you. And I just chose to believe you. Well I'm done man."
"What are you saying?"
"I'm saying I'm done with you. Don't talk to me, you understand." I grabbed the door and slammed it behind me. leaning me back against it. I took a minute to catch my breah. I tried to block all the yelling.
"You'll be done when I say you are. You're not done by a long shot. Sean appointed you to me! That bitch won't be there for long Sam! Either you get rid of her…or I will!"
"You touch her and you die!" I screamed both with anger and fear. If she told Sean where I lived now-or worse- where Hannah was- if anything happened to her. I'd never forgive myself.
"I'll let you think about it. there was no escaping this. For Hannah's sake I'd have to go back to her… for Hannah's sake…