the 23nd of this month marks the anniversary of my Best friends death. my whole life and being involved in others lives, I've struggled with loss, dealing with loss and Accepting it. how do you know when someone is really gone? when their body leaves us? when you cant remember the sound of their voice? or when you hear their voice saying "im leaving, im gone" when is someone truly .gone? and what happens when you don't want that person to leave? how do you go about making them Stay? and what if you have no choice? what if god Takes them from you, with no regard for what or who that person Is leaving behind. I've been trying for years to shake the pain of loss but now im stuck in it, stuck in loss, pounds of it. At some point in every single day i stop and think about how lucky I am to be alive and how sad I am that he's not. But he will live on in my heart and my mind, his words will stay with me forever, and to me, that means he will Never truly be gone. I will take flowers and I will sit and talk to him, because I know he watches over me, and that's the least I can do to pay my respects. it's a sad glooming feeling that lingers all through my life and poisons many days and many moments. moments where I wonder what it would be like, just than, if he was there with me. people always leave, but some people can never die