Just to let you guys know, this story is written in first person point of view. It switches between Stephan and Noah and when the point of view changes, there will be a line break to let you know that it switched from Noah to Stephan or vice versa.

With that aside, I'm happy to say that I will be re-posting this story while editing some of it as I go. Thank you to those who read and supported this story in the past and thank you to anyone who chooses to read and support this story now. Enjoy!


Prologue: Sun and the Moon

I can feel the wind beating at my skin as I sit in the back of Jason's truck with my two friends, Erika and Alex. The sun is setting in the distance as we make our way to the beach. When we get there, we all jump out, ready for one last summer swim. Alex goes over to hang over Jason — her boyfriend — and Erika locks arms with me. Simon, Jason's best friend, gets out of the car with a can of beer in his hand and takes one last drink before tossing it.

For some reason, I get the feeling that I don't belong. There's something missing from this scene. It makes my insides twist in a knot. I unhook my arm from Erika's and take off my shirt. Erika wolf whistles, trudging after me, kicking sand at the back of my legs as I take off my pants while still walking.

"Noah, if you weren't gay I would totally take you to a secluded place and molest you," Erika laughs, running ahead of me and throwing off her shirt and stopping to slip out of short jean skirt, left in a white bikini. She whirls around to smile at me, pulling her blond hair up into a pony tail so she doesn't have a million knots to brush out later.

"You just want me cause I tanned better than you this summer," I tease back, winking at her.

"I've given up on tanning," she huffs, tossing her head to the side. "I'm just going to embrace my pale, and sometimes red, existence." Absently she ran her hands down her arms, where she had gotten burned this summer.

"Thatta girl!" I shout, running towards the water and diving in. Jason is already deep out there, picking Alex up and throwing her as she screams bloody murder. I can't see Simon so I can only assume he's underwater somewhere. I'm proved right when I come up for air and two hands wrap around my ankles, pulling me back under.

After some splashing and dunking and throwing and pinching of my 'cute butt' — I don't care what people say, girls are perverts — I swim away — feeling totally violated — from my group and turn on my back, floating. I stare up at the starry sky, connecting the stars in my head before my eyes fall on the full moon.


The moon looks breathtaking, not to mention safe to look at, up there in the dark sky. I've always loved moon gazing, but something about the moon makes me feel sad and lonely. I've never been one to like the heat, so summer days always bug me. I mostly just spend them either working — I have a summer job at an ice cream parlor — or just laying in my room with the AC turned up. The only time I like going outside in the summer is at night, when the weather has cooled down and the moon is offering as much light as possible.

Then, for the second time tonight, hands enclose around my ankles and I'm dragged under water. Caught off guard, I manage to not swallow any of it and come back up for air, coughing.

"Simon! I'm going to murder you!"

But it isn't Simon who comes up; it's Erika, the little minx.

"Did I scare you?" she asks, using her baby voice.

I roll my eyes. "Oh definitely, I had flashbacks to the movie Jaws."

"That movie made me afraid to get in the tub when I was a kid!" She looks over her shoulder at our friends then back to me. "Why are you way out here?"

I shrug. "Nothing, just staring at the moon. After all this heat, I'm sick of the sun. I'm ready for winter now."

"Really? But you're just like the sun Noah! You suit summer so well."

I suppose that's true, in a manner of speaking. I'm bright and full of energy… I guess I would fit the image of a sunny person or a summer person. But I'm not. I'm a moon person and I like autumn and winter.

"If I'm a sun then what are you?"

I almost take back my words when she smiles sadly.

"Me? Oh, I'm just a cloud." And with that, she swims backwards on her back before turning around on her belly, swimming back to the group with the grace of a mermaid. Sighing, I gaze up at the moon one last time before following.


I drop the last of the boxes on the floor, happy to be done unpacking. Stretching, I arch my back, hearing it crack, and look out of the window of my new apartment. I'll have to take out all of these boxes tomorrow. This is my first time living alone, technically. Even though I feel like I've been alone all along, I've still had someone to clean up after me. Now I'm really on my own.

Well, not yet.

My father stands in the doorway, about ready to leave.

"Stephan, you understand that even though you're not living with us any longer, our expectations of you have not changed."

I nod, ready for him to go. After staring at me for a few more seconds he grunts, not having anything else to say, and leaves, closing the door behind him. I'm used to my father not having anything to say to me, but a simple 'be safe and don't forget to lock the door' would have been nice.

Once I'm sure he's not coming back to add anything, I walk over to the window, looking out almost bitterly at the moon. I don't understand how people can find it beautiful. It's cold and distant with no warmth. It's surrounded by darkness and can't seem to provide enough light to rid itself of it.

Just like me.

Scowling, I close the curtains.

I'm sick of the moon and the darkness that surrounds it.

I want the sun.