Author's Beginning Notes: I wrote this say about 8 months ago. I was really young, and writing songs wasn't really my thing. But this week I remembered it, so i re-edited it. I hope it's not too long. I guess back then I liked writing long poems and stuff. Please endure the longishness. (and yes, I really do know longishness is not a word)

(verse 1)

I'm in my room, thinking…

All my thoughts are shrinking…

It's not fair to me,

That I couldn't see,

He was always there for me….

until he died, and opened the key.

He's gone now, and I'm missin' him.

And now my hearts broken, even it's golden rim.

I'm mad at myself, for not seeing,

That all my heart needed was freeing.

He took his last breath,

Going back into death,

Know that he did it all for me.

So then I blindly couldn't see,

That he was always there for me.

(for me, only for me)

(chorus)

I'm missin' you,

All the way through!

And I don't know why,

I won't cry.

You where like a friend,

No, more than a friend.

(so much more than a friend)

Our friendship could never bend…

Well, that is….until now.

And all I can say is how,

How could this happen to me?

Why is it only a memory?

(verse 2)

I'm carrying now, trying not to think,

But all the despair is just about to sink.

It's taking over

(over me)

And all I have to do,

is set myself free.

I'm trying to fight it, and be happy,

But all I did was make myself crabby.

I'm missin' him, so much now,

And all I can do, is ask myself how,

How this could have happened to me?

I fight the urge,

to cry my heart out,

But all feel like doing,

is to go and scream and shout.

His not here, anymore,

his somewhere up there.

And it's more then I can bare.

(chorus)

I'm missin' you,

All the way through!

And I don't know why,

I won't cry.

You where like a friend,

No, more than a friend.

(so much more than a friend)

Our friendship could never bend…

Well, that is….until now.

And all I can say is how,

How could this happen to me?

Why is it only a memory?

(1st short bridge)

I'm missin' you. I hope you miss me,

Because if you don't I wouldn't blame you.

Since I couldn't see,

Everything you sacrificed for me!

At least you'd think

I would make it through!

I hope your not watching right now,

As I'm crying on my bed,

and yelling "How?"

I hope your not ashamed of me,

Though I won't blame you, see.

Can't I grow up? I live with it!

No, no, my heart yells at it.

It hurts when I think about it,

I just hope I can make it through,

'cus I'm nothing without you,

and right now,

I'm without you.

(verse 3)

I'm totally missin' him now,

And the lazy response is now:

I don't get why I couldn't see,

He promised me, he'd be there for me.

I'll never forget the memories being with him.

My heart is broken

even it's rim.

(2nd long bridge)

I miss you!

I hope you miss me too.

I hope your not lookin' at me,

'cus I'm failing on trying to set myself free.

I hope that your happy where your at,

'cus right now, hells where I'm at!

I'll never forget,

but I'll probably regret,

When I said that I'd never miss you,

Well, look at me now,

I can't make it through

('cus I'm nothing without you.

and I'll never make it through…)

I'm missing you so badly.

I'm crying sadly,

I'm hating myself madly.

I'm hurting myself badly!

My anger is working in.

My heart is so thin.

My sadness gaining fast.

My mind burning,

I hope it won't last.

I stand in my tears,

or is that rain?

I think I'm insane.

And I'm trying to think,

How I can take away that pain.

In my heart, depression's sinking in,

But I'm trying so hard for it not to win.

It's sinking, and sinking…

And something's wrong with my thinking.

(chorus)

I'm missin' you,

All the way through!

And I don't know why,

I won't cry.

You where like a friend,

No, more than a friend.

(so much more than a friend)

Our friendship could never bend…

Well, that is….until now.

And all I can say is how,

How could this happen to me?

Why is it only a memory?

(something?)

What I'm doing is faking,

But angers all it's making.

My heart is still breaking.

But I'm still faking…..

(verse 4)

I've seen the world, and what it truly is.

And now I see that I was willingly his.

I'll never survive out there,

It's cold and hard,

something I could never bare.

It's damp and cold,

But I keep my hold,

I'll fight the sadness.

And make it into gladness.

'cus I don't want to remember,

Those cold, cold memor—

(Memories)

Then he walked into death,

Without me taking a breath..

Then he was gone (forever,)

I'll never see him, (no never.)

I don't think that I'm making it through,

Because when I think about you.

The memory is too much to stand.

Why could I have seen what I had had?

(chorus)

I'm missin' you,

All the way through!

And I don't know why,

I won't cry.

You where like a friend,

No, more than a friend.

(so much more than a friend)

Our friendship could never bend…

Well, that is….until now.

And all I can say is how,

How could this happen to me?

Why is it only a memory?

(ending)

I miss you so much now…

And I'll I say is how

How could I have been so blind..

To see that I was so behind.

I never took the time to realize,

That there was no one I really despise.

I don't care if I don't think,

Just as long as depression doesn't sink!!!

I'm nothing without you….

And right now I can't make it through…

'cus I'm not with you..

I'll never make it through…

(real ending)

I don't know how I'll survive…but I know I can.

Depression's gone, and my heart ran.

It's kinda okay, but I still miss you.

But I know that somehow…I'll make it through.

(chorus)

I'm missin' you,

All the way through!

And I don't know why,

I won't cry.

You where like a friend,

No, more than a friend.

(so much more than a friend)

Our friendship could never bend…

Well, that is….until now.

And all I can say is how,

How could this happen to me?

Why is it only a memory?

Somehow I'll make it through,

I just won't be without you…

END NOTES: Sorry you had to endure that song song/poem. Please review me and tell me if you hated it or loved it.