You know, it's not like I care
when you yell at me,
just because you're my dad
and that's not the example you're "supposed" to set
doesn't mean you can't scream curses
because somebody honked at you on the road,
so that all I get out that experience
was this lady giving me the finger
when I turned around to look at who did it.
But you know, honestly?
I don't fucking care WHERE you've been
over in that godforsaken desert,
and I don't know what gave you the idea
that you're too good for therapy,
even though you yell at me because the printer jammed.
Want me to be honest?
You scare me.
So it's not all the time you do this
but I never know when it will be
So it's like walking on glass around you.
Every time you make that stupid face where
your lips get all small and your eyes narrow
and you spit out unintelligible swears, I absolutely wish
you would just fucking HIT ME.
punch me, for all I care,
just quit making that stupid face of yours.
Please, just hit me, just do
stop hugging and apologizing to me.
I'm sorry, but I need to hate you.
Because right now, I love you too damn much
and if I didn't,
it wouldn't be so bad to watch you break.