Author Note: Hellllllllooooo people of Earth!! I wanted to try a one-shot. So this is it. Sorry if it sucks. Here I go!! Let the record show that I randomly choose that name, so sorry if you don't like it.


There he is. Mr. I'm-so-popular-I'm-better-than-you. That's right, Brendon Mitchell just passed by me. Que the fan-girl squeals. In... three, two, one.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! IT'S BRENDON!! OH MY GAWSH!! HI BRENDON!!! OH!! HEY MR. HUNK!! OVER HERE!! AAAAAAHHHHH!!! LOOK PEOPLE!! IT'S BRENDON!! LOOK!! BRENDON MARRY ME!!"

*sigh* I expected that. And why shouldn't I? It happened ever day. Ever friggin' day!! He would get out of his car, a Porsche I might add, and walk around like he rules the world. Stupid prick. So what if his father owns a giant company?!? That doesn't automatically make you king of world!! Arrogant ass. And it doesn't matter if your mom's a model. You're a fruitcake in my book, and a fruitcake you shall stay. And I'm not very fond of fruitcake, might I add. Every time we get one, it 'accidentally' ends up flushed down the toilet. Ya fruitcake. One day, you'll have the same fate. Trust me on that one.

"Ouch. Must you insult me every morning? Or do you just like thinking of me?"

That's another reason I hate him. Pompous fool. He just so happens to share my mind. Now I'm not sure how, but we can read my thoughts. And that's not even the worst part. The worst part? The absolutely horrid part?? I can't read his.

"Oh, shut up and leave me alone."

"Now, now. It's a new day, my dear. Let's not try to kill each other. Okay?"

"Humph!! When pigs fly Mitchell!!"

"You fly. Is that not counted?"

"And you're an inconsiderate jerk. But I don't rub that in you're face!"

Yes, fighting with him is necessary. It's a way for us to, you know, stay sane and all. I mean, with the whole reading my mind thing, it's only natural we fight. That larcenous baboon.

"See? There you go again. Will you please stop with the name calling?"

"Oh, up yours Mitchell!! Why don't you go sleep with your whore?"

"I'd bet you'd LOVE to watch me, wouldn't you??'

-Scoff- "Maybe, if you actually had a dick." -Smirk-

"How would you know??"

"Well I- Well you- ARGH!! Just shut up!! Brainless Ursine."

"Whatever you want love. Whatever you want…"

And so, another battle is lost to Brendon Mitchell. Mr. Pain-in-the-Ass-of-the-Year. One day, oh believe me, one day Mitchell. I'm gonna kick your ass!! CHA!!