Death Row

23rd January 2001 – 23:55

'Body riddled with holes. Red liquid creeping across the white rug. Hot metal falling. The thud muffled by the ruined carpeted floor…'

Lifelost Maximum Security Penitentiary – Utah

Present Day, 23rd January 2006

Five years since my heinous crime. I look back on what I did staring at the wall. Sharp finger nails digging at what used to be white plaster. Marks from men passing through before me, their legacy within these old walls. My eyes drifted to the small bucket in the corner of my cell, the small tub slightly overflowing with my own waste. The smell of urine had lingered in the air for so long the revolting, foul smell once nauseating was now bearable as my senses became immune. The mattress underneath me was old and uncomfortable. The sharp springs groaned when I shifted my body. One particular pointed spring, which had stabbed through the frail cotton, scratched my neck. A slight trickle of blood dripped onto the stained mattress. The cold drafts of air brushing the new cut lightly, yet enough to make it sting. The slight pain only the tiniest fraction of the pain I have already received, in this dark, bland place. Fingers running loosely over the flaking, rusty bars. Paint flaking off to cover my pale fingers in black specs. Pale fingers, which hadn't met sunlight in five years. Six thick, rusty, metal bars block the musty light. Musty, from the layers of thick dust, settled centimetres deep on the thin glass. A harsh, hacking cough shifted me from my musings. The rasping sounds echoing in the high ceiling cell. The ever jangling of the guards keys and the hard clanging of metal on metal as they closed and locked the gates. That ongoing jangling echoed in my head. Slowly, slowly driving me to the point of intense insanity.

23rd January 2001 – 00:10

'The feel of cold hard metal in my sweating hands. The smooth barrel softly rolling and clicking back into place. Eight lethal bullets sat neatly in the sections, eight more laying snugly in my deep pocket. Streetlamps overhead lighting the silver metal. Glinting and shining in the feeble light. I found myself sliding off the safety catch, testing the leverage of the trigger…'

Lifelost Maximum Security Penitentiary – Utah

30th January 2006

Pair of legs hang down in front of me, from the mattress above. Feet clad in a pair of old brown boots, the heels worn down to the base. I could see black socks between the grey pant leg and the well-worn shoes. Fred Barrick, aged thirty-seven, convicted for brutally stabbing his wife. Rumour was he also hit her with a scalding iron. He joined me in my cell at the end of last month. Did the crime on Christmas Eve and was caught Boxing Day. He had three gouges on his cheek where the unfortunate woman had tried to fight back, they had healed but the scars were still there. He had a tattoo of a large spider on the back of his neck and a flame curling around his left forearm, the same place I have my snake. Fred had a bristly balding head; the few hairs he had left were rapidly turning grey from a dark brown, pierced ears healing up without a stud there to stop them, a large build and a gruff voice.

"When's the food getting' 'ere?" He grunted

"A minute."

"Better 'urry up."

It was the same everyday nothing to look forward to except food and death.

23rd January 2001 - 00:16

'Hate. Loathing. Revenge. Kill. Kill. Kill…'

Lifelost Maximum Security Penitentiary – Utah

6th February 2006

Sat in room small, white partitions between each inmate. Sitting in neat rows wearing clean suits, the only time they let us wash, when families came to visit. Or in my case a lawyer. Sitting behind the unbreakable, clear plastic wearing a black pinstriped suit, a crisp white shirt and a blue and white tie. I knew that underneath the table he would be wearing on his feet shiny, black shoes, I couldn't see them but I knew they were there. On his wrist was a silver Rolex watch with diamonds inset around the rim, which wasn't there last time he came to visit. Classy black and white cufflinks clicked gently against the grey table. A thick gold ring rested on his wedding finger and another gold ring with a square face on his right little finger. I stared ahead looking at, but not seeing the man in front of me. His formal talk was incomprehensible.

"Mr Black, are you listening?"

"Well, Mr Hosp, I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Your execution is set for the seventh of March, Mr Black."

23rd January 2001 – 22:00

'It had become too much. They had become too proud of him and they forgot me. It's always him excelling. But not anymore…'

Lifelost Maximum Security Penitentiary – Utah

13th February 2006

I'm being led by a guard eyes too hazy and breathing too shallow to pick out features from underneath the cap, pulled low over his eyes. Half being dragged and half walking through colourless corridors. Old bulbs, covered in cobwebs and dead flies, are the only source of light. Down a corridor. Round a corner. Left. Right. Left. Each turn muddling my twisted mind. It would be impossible for someone to find their way down these corridors, yet the guards were walking unaided. We made it to a bland room. The walls as colourless as the corridors and as boring as my cell. One man flanked by two guards stood in the middle of the room. One guard held a clipboard and the suited man held a long tape measure. I was positioned carefully, directly in front of the outsider. Then he began to measure. From shoulder to shoulder, head to feet, toe to toe. So it carried on, measurements for my own coffin. I pushed down the rancid bile in my throat. No man should be alive to experience being measured for such a horrid prospect. They gave me a list of woods and I got to choose, the first choice I've had while being in this pathetic place. I chose smooth, dark ebony wood.

"Who will cover the expenses Mr Black?"

"My Step-sister."

"Very well. Take him away."

23rd January 2001 - 00:17

'Passionate anger rapidly left my system, leaving in it's wake relief and temptation. Tantalizing, enticement luring me to pick another subject to taunt. The sweet seduction of adrenalin burning my disorientated mind…'

Lifelost Maximum Security Penitentiary – Utah

20th February 2006

My stepsister ran a hand through her straight, black hair, showing me her centimetre deep blonde roots. Long manicured nails tapped out a random pattern, repeating it over and over again.

"Will you pay for my coffin?"

"Since I'm the only one who would."

We stayed silent after that, what was there to say to each other, especially since we weren't actually close. Her large made up eyes swept over the other convicts, various tattoos and scars making them seem fiercer then they were. Causing Melissa to become extremely nervous. The blaring bell finally signalled for the visitors to leave. I wish I could have walked out of here with her, to feel the sun beating down on my face and the wind in my hair. Melissa would be the last free person not dressed in a uniform I would see. All of a sudden she didn't seem quite so annoying, actually she seemed to be a rather nice prospect. As if she new my thoughts she turned, smiled and slightly inclined her head in a small truce.

23rd January 2001 – 00:18

'A nosy neighbour too sly for her own good. Blaring sirens. Coming closer and louder by the second. Running and slamming the door behind me causing the glass to shake. Forgetting to wipe off my fingerprints…'

Lifelost Maximum Security Penitentiary – Utah

27th February 2006

I get one decent meal in five years. I'm to pick my favourite, my last luxury. Steak, cooked until it's brown. Golden potatoes, a slab of butter melting on top of them. Soft green peas, crunchy carrots, cauliflower and broccoli all drizzled with thick beef gravy. Each bite I took I savoured. Chewing the edible food slowly trying to prolong the sensation of actual solid food. I cleaned my palette with my tongue after each swallow, so each forkful will cause the taste to explode in my mouth. Then the whole process would start again. Until there was nothing left on the plastic tray my food had been delivered on. Excess gravy pooled on the plastic. I lifted it to my mouth and licked it so that all traces of it ever being used were gone. I wanted the salty taste of gravy to stay in my mouth as long as possible but it soon faded. It wasn't enough to satisfy five years of hunger.

23rd January 2001 – 23:55

'Body riddled with holes. Red liquid creeping across the white rug. Hot metal falling. The thud muffled by the ruined carpeted floor…'

Lifelost Maximum Security Penitentiary – Utah

6th March 2006

Once again I was lying on my bare mattress thinking of my crime. How I finally gave up trying to please my parents. Leaving my brother to swim in their glory as I thought up revenge. I was sure none of my theories would work nor did I want them to. His promotion. I remember the burning anger and the thought of never being good enough. My memories of breaking into the shop and stealing the gun were as clear as if I were doing it now. Loading the gun, then hearing a muffled shout from the door. I jumped in surprise and accidentally squeezed the trigger. The man standing in front of me collapsed onto his knees. His hands. His chest. His laboured breathing stopped and I ran. Running blindly through the streets. It wasn't until I finally stopped did I realise the gun was still clutched in my hand. I have no recollection of how I made it to my brothers house. All I remember was being there, walking up to his room after breaking in and pointing the gun at his chest. A dull ache from my arm and wrist as I shot the remaining seven bullets into his chest. I ran, and ran. Until I couldn't breathe and couldn't form a decent thought in my head. Except: I killed two men: I killed my brother.

A/n - It was for my English Coursework and I got an A* for it... what do you think of it?