What am I doing? What am I doing? What am I doing?

"What are you doing?" Sylvia asked through my car window.

Okay so right about now your probably wondering, what is he doing? Well prepare to be informed. Right now I'm sitting outside Freddy's house in my car and Sylvia is outside my window asking the same question I've been asking my self for the past ten minutes.

"You've been out here for ten minutes now talking to yourself. We got a call from the neighbors asking why there was a crazy man outside our house," Sylvia said with an amused look on her face.

I looked up at her and the amused look playing at the corners of her lips really aren't helping.

"This is going to sound bad…" I start.

"What is it?" she asked almost sweetly.

I frowned knowing how bad I was about to get it. "Well you know how I was listening to you're conversation the other day at detention?"

"Yes, but what does this have to do with you sitting outside my house?" she asked.

"Well I kind of asked Catherine about it figuring he had already asked her… but… apparently he didn't and I kind of screwed everything up and you need to help me," I said with a pleading look on my face.

She gave me one of her condescending smiles and said, "Its okay you didn't screw it up, Cat hates surprises anyway. She'll still go with him to the dance."

"That's the thing… after she said she didn't know what I was talking about I kind of said that he was going with Sally anyways."

She stared at me for a moment and said, "Why would you say that? All you had to say was 'never mind, forget I even brought it up.'"

"Yeah… about that… she's on her way over… she's a little mad," I said looking down at my hands.

She sighed and put her hands on her hips and said, "Get out of the car."

"What are you going to do to me?"I asked covering my face.

She groaned tiredly and said, "Nothing, did you really think I would take the fall for you? You're warning Freddy all by yourself."

We entered the house with me ducking behind Sylvia which was a task all in it's self.

Freddy looked up at us and laughed, "Gabe, what's up man? Why are you hiding behind my munchkin of a sister?"

"Gabe has something he needs to tell you," Sylvia said stepping away from me.

He kept smiling and said, "Alright, let's hear it."

"I fucked up…" I started to say.

I went on to tell him everything that I told Sylvia. He squinted up at me like I was the biggest dumbass in the whole tri state area.

He was about to say something when we heard a car pull into the drive way.

"Oh shit. This is the one time I wish that sound was made by our parents and not Catherine," Freddy mumbled as he went to peek through the curtains.

Sylvia smacked my arm and motioned for the kitchen. I followed her realizing that she meant we should give them some privacy.

"Catherine weighs like what? A hundred pounds? She couldn't hurt a two hundred pound quarter back could she?"

Sylvia shrugged and said, "She could always junk-punch him."

"You aren't helping me feel any better about this whole thing."

She scoffed at me and said, "Well what do you expect me to do? That was an idiot move Gabe. Cat's probably really hurt right now."

We heard the door slam shut and figured Cat had entered the house. We rushed over to spy at the door.

Cat stormed over to Freddy and slapped him across the face before any words were even said.

"You told me you weren't interested in her!" Cat yelled at him.

"I'm not I swear!" Freddy said back to her.

"Then why would you ask her to the Never Land ball? I thought you were… I thought you…"

"Cat, listen to me. You can slap me all you want, hell you could even punch me and it wouldn't change the way I feel about you."

"Then why would you do this to me? You know I wanted you to be my date."

"And I was going to ask you."

"What changed your mind? Was I not good enough to hang out with the prom king him self? Or am I too ugly and pale and skinny to be your date!"

"Catherine you could be a super model if you wanted to be, but you're like the only girl in school who could care less about that shit and that's why I'm head over heals for you. I never even asked her out, Gabe just freaked after he realized he'd basically told you that I was planning on asking you and that was the first thing the dumbass could think of. Do you understand now?"

"So Gabe was lying?" Cat asked.

"Yes! He's an idiot! That's what he does best, is screw everything up!"

I called out, "Hey I resent that!"

Cat turned toward the kitchen and asked, "Was that Gabe?"

Freddy smiled and placed both hands on her hips and said, "Yeah he came over to warn us that the most beautiful girl in town was on the loose."

I nodded and said to my self, "Wow I've got to remember that one next time I've got a girl jumping down my throat."

"Okay we need to need to give them some actual privacy," Sylvia said with a grossed out look on her face.

She pulled me away from the door and I regretfully followed her up to her room. I hadn't noticed it the first time I was here, but her room was a total mess. She had clothes strewn all over her floor and candy wrappers all over her bed. She sighed tiredly and wiped the wrappers off her bed and onto the floor. At first I wanted to come up here, but the mere sight of it made me want to ask Mike for some that Lysol he always carried around.

"Uh, are you sure I'm aloud up here? Your brother won't strangle me if he finds me in your room will he?" I asked desperately hoping I could leave her sess pool of room.

"I don't see why not? You practically live here."

"And somehow you still managed to forget my name for the past few years I've been coming over here," I mumbled to my self loud enough for her to hear. Of course she just rolled her eyes and went back to biting her nails. "Okay I'm sorry but I'm a bit of a neat freak so if you don't mind I'm just going to tidy up a bit," I added.

"Oh be my guest. Ever since my mom went back to work I've slipped right into my old ways."

I ignored the touchy comment about her mom and asked, "I wonder what Freddy and Cat are doing?"

"Probably making out till their lips fall off," she laughed.

Just then the door opened and Freddy frowned down at me as I was putting a dirty sweater in her hamper. Then he looked up at Sylvia and gave her one of his disapproving looks.

"Sylvia! You can't just scare my friends into doing chores for you! It's not right!" he screamed at her. Of course I was used to his regular sibling banter. They did this every time I came over. Sylvia would do something to piss off Freddy and he'd scream till he had no energy left and vise-a-versa.

Sylvia squinted up at him and asked, "What are you doing up here? Shouldn't you be sucking face with Catherine?"

"Why would I do that?"

"Because you're both in love with each other!" she screamed, sitting up in her bed now.

"Right now we're just a couple of friends who are going to a dance together."

She gave him one of her condescending smiles and said, "Oh how gentlemanly of you. What will it take to get you to just kiss her already?"

"You act like this is your problem."

"It is my problem when the two people who I live vicariously through decide to just take it slow. I mean come on even Mike and I have kissed already!"

"So then you don't need us to live vicariously through."

"But I'm not in love with Mike nor do I plan on ever being in love with him. You guys have been in love since kindergarten!" Sylvia screamed in desperation. By this point I didn't even know what they were fighting about anymore.

Freddy shrugged and said, "I just don't want to screw it up."

"You don't want to screw it up? Keep going at the same pace and I'll have to kiss Cat my self to keep the blood line going."

"Whatever just stop taking my friends hostage. Not everyone lives to worship you," he said.

"Freddy come on, you know I was just kidding," she pled.

He sighed and backed out of the room and said, "I'll see you at school Gabe."

Sylvia laid back in her bed screeching into a pillow that had a gummy bear stuck to it.

"Ugh! I am so tired of him making me out to be the bad guy," she groaned.

"Well how many people have you scared into doing your chores?" I asked a little nervously.

"Only two!" she defended her self.

I nodded with raised eyebrows and said, "Right."

She pointed a finger at me and said, "Don't give me that look."

I closed her closet doors and walked over to sit next to her on the bed.

"So…" I said.

"So…" she said.

"Have you got a date to the dance yet?" I asked, not knowing where I was going with this conversation.

She shrugged tiredly and said, "Well technically you aren't even supposed to ask anyone. Whoever's dressed as your soul mate has to be your date, but of course everyone's going to cheat and go with dates anyway. I mean what do they think this is? Never Been Kissed?"

"You really care about this dance don't you?" I asked with a genuine smile on my face.

"Of course I do. If I nail this one then I can win Sally's chair on the dance committee. Not that it really matters," she said trying her best not to smile.

"Aw look at you actually caring about something," I said pinching her cheeks. She smacked my hand away and rolled her eyes trying to act cool, but I could see mad blush blush spreading across her face.

She sighed and got up. "I have to go pee. Don't touch anything."

Of course when she left the room I dashed for her book shelf. An eye for an eye. If she could steal my journal then I could steal one of her journals. I quickly stuck one of the smaller one's in my pocket and sat back on the bed before she came back in.

She looked at me as if wondering why I was still in her room and said, "So I kind of have to sleep and last time you put me to bed I pretty much lost my best friend… so if you could leave now that would be great."

"Fair enough," I said as I got up.

I left the house with a smile on my face. Finally I was getting the revenge I so desperately needed.

When I arrived at my house I quickly pulled the journal out of my pocket and opened it up to the first page.

Dear journal,

Today some boy called me a bitch to my face. I didn't know whether to cry or laugh. I'm starting to think that being a strong independent woman is overrated. What's the point when day after day I'm treated like shit? People aren't even afraid of me anymore. I'm starting to wonder if they ever were. Actually yes, there's this boy, I can't remember his name for the life of me, but he cringed away from me when I simply asked him to shut up. I was very polite about it, but the pussy was still horrified by me. Never mind, I like being a bitch.

Are you kidding me? This was the type of stuff Sylvia wrote about? By the way that pussy who cringed away from her was me. This was about two months ago. Back when she didn't know my name even though I was practically over her house everyday.

I turned to a random page and smiled.

Dear journal,

I hate Gabe Sanders!!

This went on for ten more pages saying the same thing.

Dear journal,

I hate Gabe Sanders!!!

Then I found one that wasn't like the other entries.

Dear journal,

Gabe swears it was Mike who wrote the journal, but I don't believe him. I don't know who he's protecting or why, but I just know in my gut that it isn't Mike. Mike isn't a poet. It doesn't change the fact that Mike's a great guy though. I think I'm really starting to like him and not just for shallow reasons either, although he is a beautiful specimen. And every time he laughs I swear its love.

She's really falling for this guy even though she knows it's not his journal! Am I mad or glad that this is happening?

The next day at school I tried to ignore her. She came into creative writing and stared down at me as if waiting for something.

"Umm aren't you forgetting something?" she asked.

I just kept my eyes on my book until she snatched it out of my hands.

"That was rude, give it back," I said reaching up for my book.

"You're forgetting our rules. You're supposed to be on your knees praising my existence right now," she said lifting the book up in the air so I couldn't reach it sitting down.

"Look I've had a long day," I started to say rubbing my eyes tiredly.

She frowned and said, "It's first period."

"Fine. Sylvia you are a strong, amazing, independent woman and I worship the ground you walk on," I said in a monotone voice.

"Well if you're going to say it like that and take the fun out of it then you can stop," she said handing the book back to me.

"For good?" I asked.

She shrugged and said, "Yeah if you're going to make me feel bad about being awesome, then there really isn't any point to it, now is there?"

"Is that the only reason?" I asked.

She looked confused. "What do mean?"

"I don't know. Maybe you're starting to grow a conscience."

She ignored my comment and started talking to Catherine, "Hey Cat; you didn't go in my room last night did you?"

"No, why?" Cat asked looking up at Sylvia.

"It's just that I can't find my journal," Sylvia said with a disappointed look on her face.

"Big surprise," Cat and I both said in unison.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked.

"Should I say it or should you?" I asked Cat.

Cat sighed and said, "Sylvia you're kind of like a slob. I wouldn't be surprised if some new species grew from all the moldy food in there and flew off with your damn journal."

"Am I really that bad?" she asked.

I got a better look at her and said, "You have mustard in your hair."

I reached out to wipe it off with my sleeve, but she backed away.

I scoffed and said, "So you're just going to walk around with shit in your hair all day."

She kept back away from me and said, "No I just don't feel that it's appropriate for you to touch me."

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

She raised her eyebrows and said, "What am I talking about? You're getting a little too close for comfort Gabriel."

I looked at Cat to see if she understood what was happening, but she looked just as confused.

"Do you mind explaining what you mean by too close for comfort?" I asked in amusement.

"I mean that Freddy warned me to stay away from you. That you charm your way into girl's hearts with out them realizing it before its too late."

A smiled spread across my face as I said, "I'm trying to figure out whether I should be flattered or screaming my head off at you right now."

Cat assured her, "Sylvia, Gabe and I have been friends for a few weeks now and I can assure you that the only girls on his mind are floozy, blond, bimbos with boobs the size of grape fruits."

I nodded in agreement and said, "I'm flattered that you're afraid that you'll fall in love with me though. I am pretty hard to resist."

"I'm not afraid; I'm just following orders so from now on please refrain from touching me," she said with her face getting redder with each word.

I smiled and lifted my hand up to rub her cheek, "Alright Sylvia, I'll try to keep my hands off of you. Although it will be hard to stay away from this silky smooth skin and locks as unique as angel's hair."

She eyed me strangely for a minute and then smacked my hand away with such force that a girl her size shouldn't have. I rubbed my hand like a wounded puppy, but kept my smile. I was getting on her last nerve.

Lunch was the worst part of my day now that Sylvia started sitting with us; so much for the three musketeers. I finally find a pair of really good friends that I can have an intellectual conversation with and Sylvia just goes ahead and ruins that for me too.

Sylvia stopped eating her sandwich and said, "Gabe you're going to have to stop glaring at me now, because you're really starting to scare me."

"Why are you even here? What happened to you being buds with Simone?" I asked in an annoyed tone.

"The only reason I started hanging out with her was because I knew she was your best friend and I wanted you to suffer the loss of the one girl who really understood you. What ever that means," she said with a sinister grin.

"Why are you so obsessed with ruining my life?" I asked roughly.

"Because you called me mindless for no good reason."

"Sylvia I hate to break it to you, but I am in fact a pretty nice guy. Ask Cat and Mike. All I ever do is nice stuff for them. I even drive them where ever the hell they want to go because that's just how nice a guy I am."

"Well then why the hell do you treat me and only me like shit?"

She shook her head in annoyance when I didn't answer and left. Mike looked to me as if asking if he could follow her out. I shook my head no and got up to go after her.

I called out to her, "Sylvia, wait! I'm sorry."

She whipped her self around to face me. I gulped. This wasn't a good sign.

She seethed, "Read my lips: you make me sick, you make me want to puke, and the sight of you makes me weak, in a bad way. When are you going to realize that you started this fight! Now I'm going to need you to get down on your knees and really beg for forgiveness or else I'll never even as much as look at you. Knowing you, you'll probably just laugh in my face because that's exactly what you want."

I didn't even hesitate to drop down on my knees.

"Sylvia… I'm so sorry. You're right. After all you've never made me cry and I don't even want to know the number of times I've made you cry. It's just that I… I guess I sort of… think you're like the coolest girl I've ever met… but you think that I'm a dumb jock who degrades women… which I do, but the thing is I get that you have feelings… I just need you to get that I have feelings too," I said. When I finished we both sat there in surprise. Had I really just said all those things out loud? Did I even mean half the things I had said?

She bit her lip and said, "Umm… okay."

"Okay what?" I asked.

She shrugged, looking down at her feet and said, "Okay you have feelings and I guess I owe you an apology too. I'm sorry."

I smiled and said, "Can I get off my knees now, they're starting to hurt."

"I guess. After all we can't have the captain of the soccer team complaining of knee injuries. Dumb jock."

I stood up and walked along with her back towards the court yard.

"You know I didn't mean any of that right?"I asked.

"Of course you didn't," she said, giving me a look that said she knew I meant every word.