notes. i feel sad. stupid love. and does it make sense . . . that i still love him anyway?
What Had Been
an angsty romance oneshot by: toffeecakesxox.
I hear you say, "Let's just be friends," but it takes a while to settle in . . . and, when it does?
I smile and say, "I'm okay with that," when, in reality, I'm not. That's just me: the people-pleaser.
Had I really been worth it? The in-depth talks, the hugs, the tickle fights . . . the smiles and laughter?
Or had it just been a show? A teasing see-through picture of what had been?
You don't notice how my heart breaks in two, can't hear the almost echoing crack as well as I thought you could've.
Remember that one time where I had told you I could hear your heartbeat? And when you replied with a, "I can hear yours too"?
I remember smiling then, feeling happy, carefree, and totally worry-free because I had you by my side, through thick or thin.
Maybe I was just wrong.
Maybe my childish dreams of having "The One" and thinking that you were him had gotten in the way.
Or maybe I had just scared you with my romantic daydreams, how I'd said I loved you only a few weeks after telling you my feelings . . . and for you, of all people.
Maybe I was just plain old stupid.
What could've been . . . oh, how I wish we had had that chance. To start all over, to go maybe a little slower.
I remember missing you like none other, how I called and said, "I miss you," when I felt like it.
So maybe it was the fact that I loved you way too much already to let you go that had gotten to you.
Or maybe it was our parents, so against our relationship that they drilled it into us that we were too young, too inexperienced with ways of the heart to possibly start a relationship and maintain it.
Maybe our parents were right.
I'd had complete faith in us, that we would get through everything together . . . but maybe I was just too hopeful.
But, now, we're friends so, what can I do?
. . . I have to get over you.
But I don't know if I can.
I felt like writing this because this has happened to me . . . today in fact. *sigh*
Love does hurt.
edit: don't forget to check out my beta-ettes stories! (because i think they're all lovely-wonderful.) links on profile & website. thank you! :)
edit #2: i don't like him anymore. he's just changed . . . i don't really see what appealed him to me, now. but thank you all for the reviews & reads.