Dear Mum,

I'm writing this to you because, well, i don't think dad would understand. He'll hate me for a while, because he thinks parents should go before their children, but that doesn't always have to be true.

You may hate me as well, and that's OK because you thought I told you everything. I didn't. If I had, I wouldn't be writing this, it wouldn't have got so bad. You thought I had a lot of friends, that I was always out partying – you never questioned it, and at the time i was glad for that.

I'd sometimes go around Alicia's house – you always liked her. She'll look after you mum, I know she will. I think maybe she'll hate me too, because we always said we'd stick it out together. Well, I can't. Not anymore. School is hell, it always has been. For both of us.

But Alicia blended into the background; she was part of the wall. They ignored her. They didn't ignore me.

You remember, summer before last when I broke my arm on Alicia's trampoline, when her parents were away?

That never happened.

They broke my arm mum; they pushed me down the stairs near the beach. Alicia wasn't even there, it was just me. She knew about it but she also knew not to say anything because I didn't want you to know.

I thought I knew better.

Maybe, if I had told you, I could have moved schools, but I couldn't leave Alicia alone, not then.

I just....I can't take it anymore mum. I really can't. I haven't slept in three weeks because i hate waking up and knowing the next thing i do is go to school.

Why do you think I took so many days off school? Until the school noticed and 'had a word' with you, resulting in you driving me to school every day.

That made things so much worse, because they used to catch me before the first bell went; they thought you came to protect me.

So, when they got me on the way home, they made it worse.

You may think I'm taking a cowards way out, but i have given this a lot of thought. What I am about to do is so scary, so terrifying that I don't think a coward could do it.

I love you mum, so much. Tell dad I love him to, and Alicia.

I'll look over the three of you, especially Alicia, because I don't think suicides do go to hell, God would not be so cruel as to give me hell in the afterlife as well as this one.

I just can't take it anymore.

I love you mum.

Always your Angel.

Miranda

21st March

Miranda Tracy Richards, found at her home after taking an overdose of sleeping pills on the 16th March, died yesterday whilst in a coma.

She was two months away from her 18th birthday, and would have left St Matthews School this July.

Thoughts are with her friends and family.