And that was it. My one moment of weakness. The moment there was, when I lost all sight of the holy glow that had sustained me my whole life, and cursed my father with all my soul.

When the devil tempted me in the desert, when he stroked my hands and whispered in my ear in his soft, gentle voice of all the beautiful things the world had to offer, I never wavered... When his piercing blue eyes stared straight into my brown ones, I cast him out. Flung off his gentle touches, spat in his soft sweet mouth, closed my ears to his honeyed words. I never wavered from the words of my father, my lord. My God, I could still hear you then!

But this...

Such pain as I had never felt before. The pain of dying. The pain of death. Every part of my body being ripped apart, my bones screaming and crying inside of me, the stench of blood dripping down my face from their crown of thorns, the buzz of flies in my ears, the deadly heat of the burning sun, the pain.

And in the last moment, when darkness passed before my eyes and the laughing faces of the soldiers below, when the pain blossomed once more in my breast, at that last moment between life and death, I raised my eyes to the sky and cursed him, my father, my maker, my lord. Cursed the one who had made me go through this agony, all for the sake of mankind, for all their sins. Let them burn for their own sin, let him burn too, let this whole world burn, if only this pain would stop!

I shrieked, roared to the heavens, a wordless shout of agony and hatred, and for an instant I fancied I saw his face, the devil's, his handsome tender mouth turned up at one corner, gentle eyes full of laughter, one hand beckoning. And I went, I followed him blindly, anything to make the pain go away!

But still.

Here I am.

He forgave me you see, my father, my lord, my God.

Not for my sake.

For the sake of mankind.

They needed a hero. Someone they could believe in. But he did not take away their sin. Could not - would not. All for that moment of weakness, that one moment when I was too much man, and not enough God.