Abandonment

An expression of nothing
Will tell you everything;
Abrupt and sudden silence
Speaks louder than any words.

She was left long ago
Abruptly abandoned
With no notice as to when
He'll bother to return.

She still sits loyally
Where she was left
Even when the cold sets in
And even as the darkness
Draws close.
Her thoughts are brimming
With getting up and retreating—
Walking away with no
Intention of ever coming back.

Curling up, she uses the darkness
As her blanket as she
Closes her eyes,
Given up on staring into a
Horizon that provides no relief.
This feeling drives nails into
A heart that already pulses hard
With double confusion and grief.
But she tells herself it's okay—
The pain is temporary,
He'll come back again.

But she's so tired of
Being the patience-filled loyal
Lover she's trained herself to be
Spending countless hours
Boiling with heartache and anger
Only to wash it down when
He comes back, apologetically.
Swallowing bitterness
Is medication she no longer
Wishes to receive.

Sometimes she contemplates
Absolutely disappearing
Getting up and fleeing into
The distance, with no signs as to
Her time of return.
She'd love to flee and,
For a moment,
Reverse these roles.
But she knows it to be selfish
And wrong to treat a heart
In such a way.
But the allure of making
A hasty retreat
Always creeps into her mind
When she's been left behind.

Just like now.

So finally one day
The loyal woman loses her will
To remain steady,
And by the time he's come back
He returns to an empty spot
Without a message,
Without an estimate of
When she'll be back.

Abandonment never knows
The pain it causes.
It never bothers to ask
"When are you coming home?"
And it takes just one visit
For anybody to realize just
How horrid it can be.

And so she gets up,
And disappears into the night.
Another abandonment awaits.