I miss you both so much.

And I don't even know either of you.

Doesn't stop me from missing you both.

I shouldn't be allowed to feel this empty inside;
Who decided that people should miss the things they never had?
Whoever decided that was a real genius.

I miss you both so much.
I wish I could've held you in my arms;
I wish I could've cradled you close to me;
I wish I could feel either of your heartbeats beating in time to mine.

One of you would've been here for a month as of two days ago.
The other, well…I would've met you soon enough.

It's not fair.
Had things been different, had things only worked out differently…
Maybe I'd still have you –
At least one of you.

Had things worked out for the better,
I'd have you.
I'd hold you.
I'd cherish you.
I'd protect you from all that I could.
I'd love you with all that I am.

But things didn't work out that way.
Shit happens.
That's life.

And as it is, we were young.
We weren't ready.
Not for you.
Not for anything.

Not for forever.

And we still are young,
And we still aren't ready.

I've all but moved on from you.
Both of you.
I easily tell myself and everyone around me that I'm happy you're gone to some extent.
My life is that much easier now because you're not here.
I easily say that I didn't think I was ready to have you around anyway.

But there are times when everything around me reminds me of you,
And I realize just how much a part of me has been holding onto you desperately.
How much a part of me wishes you could be here in my arms.

I just wish…
I just wish that things could be different.
That we were older.
That we were ready.
That you were here.

God how I miss you.


Author's Note: Yes, I realize this must sound like a love note of some sort, and one for more than one lover, but it's not - in fact, it's far from that. I just needed to get it out. If you're curious as to what this is about, ask me about it in a comment or review and I'll answer you, but otherwise, I'd rather not state it on here. Thank you.