Erik and Caelan's Boogers, Puggyboo and Flarshva, were waiting at Kristen's feet when the two men got to the ground.
"Lwa-ra!" Puggyboo called out in greeting.
"Lwa-ra," Flashva agreed. Erik patted them fondly, and then began looking around for Caelan. He soon found him wedged in a huge crack in the wall, sleeping.
"Caelan, wake up," he said. Caelan snored loudly. "Caelan!" Erik shouted.
"Oh no, chipmunks in my dirty underwear?" Caelan mumbled, and then continued snoring. Erik grimaced, and kicked Caelan's fleshy side as hard as he could. Caelen yelped in pain and his eyes flew open. "Was that really necessary?" he grumbled as he began pulling himself out of the wall, "You're damaging my carefully preserved fat tissue."
"Good, then maybe Flarshva will live another few decades," Erik muttered.
Caelen glared at him and said hotly, "Hey if we run out of food down in that hole you're dying first. My fat tissue will keep me alive."
Erik laughed shortly, "And what are you going to do when your fat runs out?" He asked dryly.
"I'll eat your corpse," Caelen replied, and waddled off triumphantly. Erik soon followed him, but was careful to stay a few feet away.
Together they packed their necessities, mounted their Boogers, and headed once more for Kristen's giant belly. After an hour of riding through the dense hair, Erik stopped Caelan. "It should be near, let's walk," he said. Flarshva "Lwa-ra"ed in agreement, it's legs trembling in exhaustion.
"Oh all right," Caelan said, trying to jump off of Flarshva, "but I don't like it."
Erik rolled his eyes as he helped Caelan off the Booger, "You don't like anything but food and your own belly fat."
"Don't forget money," Caelan reminded him, "I love money." He sighed dreamily, "Money and fame and chocolate vanilla ice-cream." Erik gave him a little push.
"Keep walking, fat man," He ordered. Caelan gave him a sour look, but obeyed. Puggyboo and Flarshva snorted as they followed. Suddenly Caelan let out an earsplitting scream and disappeared. Erik looked around frantically, "Caelan!" he shouted.
"I'm down here!" Caelen shouted from beneath him. Erik looked down, and saw the upper half of Caelan's body sticking out of the ground. All at once Erik realized what happened. Caelan was being eaten by a giant pimple!
"Caelan, I'll save you!" Erik cried, and began tugging on Caelan's arm. But his efforts were unnecessary, for a few seconds later Caelan shot up in the air, past the belly hairs, and then fell back down and landed hard on Kristen's belly. The pimple spit again.
"Ugh!" It complained, "That man is all fat and no meat. Disgusting!"
"I have to be better tasting than those filthy peasants." Caelan protested as Erik quickly pulled him away. The pimple looked thoughtful, in that way pimples do.
"Well, that is true," it admitted, "but I don't eat sweets anymore."
Caelan's mouth dropped open in awe, "No sweets?" he breathed as he stored Erik into one of his belly folds to get him out of the way.
"I'm trying to be healthy, you see." The pimple explained. "I need to set a good example for my children." Caelan nodded sympathetically, though he didn't understand at all. "Also, at my age, I have diabetes and cancer to worry about." The pimple continued. "If I get too bothersome, Kristen will pop me! I can't leave my children fatherless." Caelan nodded again, still uncomprehending.
"Well, I got to go," he said after a few seconds of awkwardness, "Nice meeting you!"
"Nice meeting you too!" The pimple replied in a jolly voice, gurgling and oozing happily as Caelan waddled away.
Once the pimple was out of sight Caelan reached under his belly folds and pulled out Erik. Erik, who was used to this kind of treatment, said nothing. He merely stood up and walked off. The two walked the rest of the way in silence, and finally, they found It. It was just as all the legends said it was, a giant hole in the middle of Kristen's belly.
"Whoa…" Erik breathed, staring down into the pitch black darkness of It, "That's amazing! Do you think it really is the gateway to Hell?"
Caelan coughed nervously, and shuffled his feet. "Maybe this isn't such a good idea," he said finally.
Erik gave him a sharp look, "We've come this far, we can't back out now," he said.
"Yea, but…" Caelan said, looking down at his feet.
Erik sighed, "Look, I'm scared too-"
"No, no it's not that," Caelan interrupted quickly. "It's just that…" he started, flushing scarlet, "Well I'm not sure I'll fit."
"Fit?" Erik said, looking confused.
Caelan's face reddened further, "Fit, as in I'm too… big." Erik stared at him for a moment, and then burst out laughing. His laughter soon died away as he realized that Caelan was telling the truth. He looked at It, and then looked at Caelan.
"You're right," he said, a bit stunned. Caelan's shoulders slumped, "Guess this means I can't go," he said miserably. Erik thought for a moment, and then his eyes hardened.
"No, you're going. We'll make you fit," he said firmly.
Caelan shrugged, and then sighed. "Ok then well I guess this is It, let's go."
Erik looked disgusted, "I hate puns," he muttered to himself. Caelan stepped to the edge of It, and jumped. He got a bit stuck halfway down, but He bent down over the hole, and shouted, "Caelan, are you down there?!" He waited for a moment, and then a reply came, "Yes! Send down Flarshva." Erik turned and looked at Flarshva, "Go down there," He instructed, and Flarshva immediately jumped. Erik then pushed Puggyboo in and leapt in himself. They all fell in a pile on the ground, or whatever the bottom of It was called. Groaning, Erik pulled himself off Flarshva and stood up shakily. Rubbing a quickly-forming bump, he opened his eyes and looked around. His mouth dropped open.