"Bye," she whispered into my ear, before pecking me on the cheek and running off.

I stood and sighed, staring at her back. I was deeply and blissfully in love. After two lengthy years, she finally returned my feelings that I harbored for her, feelings that began three years after I met her. Now, as juniors turning seniors in high school, I relished the fact that I still had another year with her, another year of happiness. Or so I believed.

I turned, only to collide with a figure. The force of our crash sent her rebounding onto the floor and spilled her textbooks onto the ground.

"Sorry," I heard her mutter as she started collecting the books.

"My fault," I replied, bending back down to help her. She looked up as I went on my knee. I recognized the familiar hair parted to the right, the light eyebrows, the dark and pretty eyes, and clear complexion. I realized who I bumped into as I handed over the books. "Oh, didn't know I bumped into you, Samantha!"

"Stick to sarcasm," she smirked. She shifted the books in her arms, and I started walking with her.

"Where you heading to?" I asked. We were walking out of our school. The rusty steel gate creaked in the light gusts. I shivered slightly; the gusts felt unwelcoming.

"Home. You're welcome to walk me there; my parents aren't home right now anyway," she smiled. We were neighbors and knew each other since childhood. Since we were both busy high school students, the walks home together were usually the only time we could talk. I gave a small sigh, wishing for the old days when we used to be as close as an unbreakable knot.

She noticed my sigh, cocked an eyebrow, and asked lightly, "Missing your girlfriend already? That was fast."

My eyelids fell in a soft, exasperated expression. "I'm not THAT needy of her. I can live for an hour without her by my side, thanks."

She laughed. The sound chimed in my ears; I've always loved her laugh. Thoughts about her began to creep into my head…I shook it off. A feeling of lightheadedness surrounded me. What am I thinking?

Soon, we arrived at her home and went up to her room. The curtains were open when we entered, revealing a rather picturesque view of some trees arching slightly over the street, cars parked sporadically on both lanes. She and I both dropped her books on her desk, Sam massaging her arms slightly from the weight.

We simply chatted for a while. I didn't keep track of the time. My eyes suddenly began to rove over her, analyzing her body and features. I shook my head again and turned my head to look around the room. She was talking; her voice rang in my head, but thoughts swam in my head. What's wrong with me? I'd never do that to Sam. I've known her all my life. I don't have feelings for her…I…

"Are you okay?" My body jerked to her calling me. Her face held a light and worried expression; her eyes focused me, and her lips curled into a small frown.

"I…" I began. Then it happened. I launched myself against her, pinning her to the frame of her bed. She grunted from the push, and looked me directly in the eyes. She asked me, without talking, what I was doing. I knew what I was doing. But I couldn't stop. I put my lips to hers fiercely, my hands holding onto her face. Sam's hands flew up in resistance, but my unrelenting passion overpowered her. When I did regain some slight control of myself, I parted my lips from hers and looked at Sam. Her eyes were closed, and she was breathing slowly and heavily. "Go on," I thought I heard her whisper. My eyes opened wide fearfully. What did she say…? My mind thought blankly.

But not my body. I lifted her from the bed and slammed her onto a wall. My lips crashed into hers again. My hands roamed her sides and back, feeling her body through her shirt. My body grinded against hers. This isn't right! My mind screamed. I can't do this! Not to Sam! And not to her! Stop! My mind mentally broke down.

***

I awoke with a scream and bolted upright. Breaths of air flew in and out of me. I choked and ran my hands through my sweat-ridden face. Tossing aside the covers, I made my way swaying to the bathroom. A few splashes of water calmed me down, and my heart rate slowly returned to normal. I leaned against the wall opposite the mirror and slid down, still trying to catch my breath. My mind ran through the nightmare I had.

"Why…" I groaned. I've never fallen in love for Samantha before. I could never love her. We were strictly friends. There was no way for us to see each other past that.

Are you sure? A voice whispered in my mind. I shuddered. The voice resembled Sam's.

"I know. I'm not in love with Sam. I'm in love with…" And I closed my eyes painfully. The idea of being disloyal to my lover was too much to bear.

I don't know. Think about your nightmare… Images began to flash through my mind. My lips on Sam's. My hands exploring her body. My body pinning her to the wall. I began to burn on the inside. My morals began to crumble around me. The feeling of love felt sick and twisted inside me. The voice continued to whisper to me, torturing me, retelling the events of the dream and emphasizing the joy and pleasure I felt. I was writhing internally, unable to escape the guilt, fear, and pain that stabbed me. Soon, I was gasping…my mind became my own again…the voice left me. I lay on the floor of the bathroom. I did not get up until dawn broke.

***

"Hi," my girlfriend cheerfully greeted me that morning. She started radiating with happiness upon seeing me. I turned to face her and gave a bleak smile. Her smile faltered when she saw my expression. "Are you okay?"

I hesitated, then motioned to a nearby bench silently. She sat down opposite me, and began to analyze my face with scrutiny. I'd guess that she sensed something was wrong. Unfortunately for her, she was horribly right.

"I'm really sorry about this." I chose my words carefully. My voice spoke in a disguised tone of sincerity. In truth, I felt impatient. The voice…I called it my conscience…scolded me for even bothering with her.

She looked shocked. Fear crept up her face. I grasped her outstretched right hand in mine, her other hand on her face; she shuddered unconsciously from the feeling of my cold skin. The warmth of her hand shocked me a little, as though I was relishing the feeling that I would not get in a long time. "I'm breaking up with you. This isn't working out anymore."

Her expression did not change. She had expected it. She could only utter, "Why?"

I sighed and let go of her hand. I buried my face in my hands. "I don't have feelings for you anymore. You don't attract me." I began to lose control. I was impatient to see Sam. Now was the time she usually arrived. "I despise you now. Leave me alone." I stood up and started walking away. A small grin appeared on my twisted visage; I was finally free from her!

I felt a pair of hands grab one of mine, holding me back. I heard her voice again. "Wait!"

Anger erupted through me. I spun around and viciously backhanded her face, sending her crashing to the ground. She gasped from the pain and looked at me, tears in my eyes.

"I DON'T LOVE YOU ANYMORE!" I roared, before leaving her again. Her sobs echoed in my ears; I ignored them. I never looked back. I was walking away from love forever, abandoning it from my life. Lust had possessed me. I lost.

Soon, I saw Samantha. She smiled and waved at me when she noticed. I ran over and greeted her with false enthusiasm. The bell rang then, and I motioned to walk her to class.

Before she went into her first period, I asked her, "Before you leave…" I smiled on the outside, grinning lustfully on the inside. "…Can I walk you home today?"