Beginning of The End
I WAS RUNNING AND SCREAMING—EVEN PRAYING. I WAS DOING ANYTHING TO GET away from the shadows swiftly and effortlessly following me. I knocked down trash cans and I skidded around every corner trying to lose them. The laughter followed me. The taunts were getting more threatening as the three men closed the distance.
"Stop running! It's not our fault you smell so delicious. As a matter of fact," said the one in a trench coat. The others snickered; the running wasn't affecting their breathing at all. He continued, "The more you run the faster the blood pumps and the stronger the smell. You can't even hide."
His voice was unbroken and loud. It was difficult to believe this guy was running just as fast as I was. I was a great track athlete after all. I scrambled around a corner and slammed my face into my doom. It was a chain link fence. Shit.
Why was this happening to me? I don't understand it. This is what you see in the horror movies. "Stupid girl, why did you turn the corner, didn't you know there was a fence? There's always a stupid fence." My inner ranting was interrupted as my hunters stalked around the corner.
My mind started to race as the men started to saunter towards me; they were graceful like felines. Were they going to rape me? Why the hell would they? I'm wearing like five freaking layers of clothing! And I smell good? Are they cannibals!? The thoughts kept coming as they came closer. I was frozen.
"And here we are at the end of our little chase. Silly girl, didn't you know there was a fence? There is always a fence." mocked the trench coat man. If I didn't fear for my life at that moment I think I would have been embarrassed.
"What the hell do you want me for!" I demanded—Okay, I squeaked. He smiled even bigger, if that was possible, and stepped closer. We were five feet from each other, not close enough to kill me, but not enough space for me to get around him. Also those thugs were blocking any possible exit beyond that. I was stuck. So I glared at the leader.
"Well you see," He calmly explained, "We are vampires and we are hungry. Then there you were all alone, smelling as though you would make a tasty, half-pint snack between the three of us." He clearly thought this was hilarious. I would have laughed at the fact he said vampires if it wasn't for his inhuman eyes and predatory grin.
They looked at me as if expecting me to drop to my knees crying 'I have a family, I have a dog, and I have a life…' but I didn't. I was too frozen in fear. Finally the two subordinates closed the gap completely. I wished I would have said goodbye to my mother before I stormed off.
The leader looked at me intently, sizing me up; probably planning my slow torturous non-romantic death. Too bad these weren't Hollywood vampires, although they looked like it, especially the leader. He closed the distance and had his face mere centimeters from my head in less than a millisecond. This wasn't right, he was too fast. I sucked in my breath careful not to breathe. It would be my last anyway.
"Stay very still. If you are a good girl I won't tear you apart limb from limb slowly." He whispered. His breath was cold against my ear. It would have been a perfect lover's whisper if it wasn't for the sick message. It really didn't help that he was attractive. Wow complimenting your killer…how appropriate.
He kept doing the strangest things. He sniffed my neck and brought his fingers to trace the collarbone. It was impossible to stay still. I felt so violated and scared. This is wrong. This wasn't like the movies. I should be dead by now. DEAD.
My nails were digging into my skin so deep that blood pitter-pattered onto the asphalt. He stopped his caressing of my neck and stiffened. He faced me now, hunger wild and flaring in his eerie blue eyes, so stark against his shoulder length black hair. I don't understand why an older teenager would be doing this to me; playing vampires in the middle of New York at three in the morning.
Out of the corner of my eye I saw the other two guys leap for me and I felt the vampire holding me sink his fangs into my neck. There were searing pains from everywhere. It burned like fire.
I heard someone scream. Before I blanked out completely—I realized it was me.
Black…everything was black…and then suddenly the scene lit up in my mind.
I was running, screaming, even praying. I was doing just anything to get away from the three demon-like creatures following me. I turned the corner and hit a fence. It seemed to stretch above me; dream like. Was this a dream? It seemed very unlikely that these things would be following me. I still panicked though as one transformed into a tall seductive boy. He was maybe nineteen. I felt even more frightened. He reached out a hand to caress my cheek and leaned in to—
It burned. I was on fire. Every part of my body felt like it was sizzling in 1000 degree temperature. I felt as though my throat had ruptured and I couldn't scream anymore. It came out in weak gurgling gasps. Numbly I was clawing at my face. Anything to distract the burning sensation I felt, just anything. Amidst my current indescribable condition I heard voices.
I focused hard to get past the burning that racked my body and tried to reach for something. I couldn't open my eyes, it hurt too much. I smelled blood and dirt. Dirt? I was in an alley way wasn't I, when those men—I opened my eyes in the sudden explosion of memory from that night. The light seared through my eye sockets and I quickly clamped them shut. Then I tried so feebly to get up. I walked three steps until I collapsed into soft springy weeds.
I'm in someone's yard.
Something struck me and I blacked out for the second time.
I woke up on something hard and lumpy like an old mattress and screamed. I could scream again. It hurt much less but it startled me just the same. The burning was less intense now, and I could open my eyes. I saw blurry shapes through my tears. I blinked them away. I heard a buzzing noise that could only be from the immense headache I had. Now that the fire has mostly subsided I noticed the other pains and injuries...and there were none. I knew I was bitten at least several times but there were no markings on my arms, my legs, and my torso. Then I realized it…
I was NAKED.
I screamed again in pure horror and I guess I finally got on someone's nerves. I heard loud stomping footsteps coming down what I could assume to be stairs. I must've been in a basement.
"It's been two days, you can stop bloody screaming!" said a loud voice I knew only too well. I heard the door knob turning and I crossed my legs and folded my arms over my chest. This is so horrifying! I trembled and ignored the mild burning sensation that took over my body.
The black haired teen from my nightmares opened the door and looked at me angrily, then suddenly became amused at my terrified, naked state. I could do nothing but shudder and squeeze my legs and arms tighter.
"You know if I had any interest in that I would have had you under me by now." He stated, smirking a bit as if I wanted that.
"Then why am I naked?" I asked in almost a whisper, I screamed so much my voice was hoarse...
"Well my cohorts and I went a little overboard with the feeding; most of your clothes were ripped off in the process. Then we thought someone was coming—over sensitive ears are such a pain sometimes—so we ran off. Your screaming became quite unbearable and we didn't know who it was, then I realized we left you alive. So the venom must have spread. At that point we couldn't leave you behind. You would be a newborn." he paused for a second or two, sadness flashed across his electric blue eyes. Then they were hard again.
"Anyway, by the time I found you, you had dragged yourself a long way. I watched you come to and struggle to walk. I promptly bashed you on the head with my fist to knock you out. And now here you are. Good enough? Cover all your questions?"
I realized my jaw went slack from the fact that they went overboard with biting me. What was going on here! He merely looked at me waiting for a response. I just kept looking at him with an incredulous expression while analyzing further of what he said.
"A newborn?" I squeaked.
"Well yes. A newborn vampire, as you would understand it to be. You see, when we bite into our prey a chemical, or poison, is unleashed to ensure they can't escape, as if our superior strength, speed, and appeal did not guarantee that alone. This poison makes the victim go through a huge amount of pain so they can't fight us off and if left alone it can change them into vampires, like a disease. Usually the human does not survive, so we don't worry about it too much, but apparently, you lived through the process…Congrats." His sick humor seemed to be back. He sat on the edge of the mattress and I curled farther into a ball.
"Oh yea. Here you go." He got up and walked to a shelf, grabbed some clothes and tossed them to me. Without picking them up I saw a black t-shirt, boxers, and black gym shorts. I stared up at him incredulously again. He gestured for me to put them on and he kept looking at me expectantly. Wait a second. Did he expect me to put them on while he's looking?
"Turn around." I demanded, I was being brave and stupid but embarrassment was my most extreme emotion right now.
He sighed and turned around.
"I swear I do not have any interest in that." He explained as though disgusted.
"Then why do you mind so much being told to turn around?" Again, I was numb; I didn't care if he was angry.
"Because it means you think I was interested in seeing you naked." He answered through gritted teeth.
"It wasn't my fault you and your buddies had to attempt to kill—" I started to pull up the shorts, the last of the clothing, when he suddenly grabbed my throat and slammed me against the wall over the mattress. His face was centimeters away like the first night.
As he glared at me his eyes were raging in anger, his lips were curled into a menacing snarl.
"You are dead. You've been dead since two days ago Emily." He sneered, somehow lifeless breath chilled my face; as if it had never been breathed at all but only blown into my face by a fan.
I didn't feel dead. Quite the opposite, I could feel my heart…my heart?
For the first time since I woke up, I realized I have never felt my heart pounding or even beat once. I only imagined or assumed it was. I held my breath, taking advantage of his silence to test what he had said. I held it for longer than I should be able to, and my lungs were not screaming for air. I felt empty but not starving for oxygen. I supposed he saw my eyes bulge with realization because he suddenly let go of my throat and backed off a bit.
"I assure you, I didn't mean for this to happen. Dying as food is one thing, but becoming a vampire is just cruel. I apologize. I really truly do." He whispered, looking into my eyes deeply and sincerely for the first time. I didn't buy it.
"H-how did you know my name…?" I stammered, shocked to hear my name said in such a lovely voice from his earlier speech.
He tossed his head back in exasperation; his hair clinging wildly to his face as he brought his back to my level. Why am I noticing these things? Why am I admiring him?
"I tell you you're dead, then not dead but a vampire, and I apologize for not killing you completely, and you just want to know how I, a mythological creature, know your name. You are so absurd!" he yelled.
"Perhaps." It was all I could think of to say. In a deep sick way I was enjoying my bravery. It still all felt so numb and dreamlike.
"You had a wallet. It wasn't that hard. A four year old could figure that out." He explained finally.
"So this is real? I'm a vampire?" I asked…I felt the walls closing in on me.
He looked at me gravely.
"If being able to live forever, if being able to live involves the consumption of human blood is what a vampire is, then yes. You are a vampire."
I think I was about to faint again. I felt strong arms hold me as I felt myself droop into a dreamless…only sleep-like state.
I woke up, or what I assumed was waking up. It felt like I had never slept at all, time just jumped ahead. I just blanked out. It scared me, and so I wept.
I wept for my mother who no doubt was blaming herself for our argument, and what a stupid thing we argued about. How did arguing about whether or not I should date turned into me running away childishly then being killed by a pack of vampiric bastards?
God had a sick sense of humor; or maybe just bored. I don't know which.
I was lying on my back on the old mattress in the assumed basement. It could be a damned crypt for all I know. And what do I know? My name is Emily Kingston, I am 17 years old, and I'm a vampire as of two or three days ago. Wow, what an abundance of knowledge. There was a knock on the door. I managed a weak "Come in."
Then ironically I smiled, as if my permission really mattered; so nice of them to pretend. It clicked open slowly to reveal the gorgeous monster of my nightmares. Well, one of the gorgeous monsters, the trench coat man was the only one I've actually seen clearly or spoken to since…that night.
"Feeling better Princess?" he asked, sarcastically polite.
"I feel as fit as a corpse." I retorted, it was a lame pun, but it did its job. He twitched, and then regained his usual cocky attitude as if he owned me. And hell, he probably does.
"Anyway, I'm here to see if you're feeling at all famished. Hunger in a newborn is almost as dangerous as me." he laughed.
This guy is as multifaceted as a Rubik's Cube. He's sad, he's angry, he thinks he's the funniest damn guy on the planet, and cocky. I don't know which color shows or when he changes. He's just as damn complicated too. What a freaking woman. I added that observation to my imaginary data-bank. Also, speaking of my limited knowledge, I decided to ask what his name was as all devils needed a name.
"I have many, but you can call me master." He smiled a crooked smile. His fangs, barely noticeable to someone who wouldn't think to look for them, glinted.
"As if! I don't need this! I'm done with this fucked up game of yours! I'm leaving!" I was once again getting a high from my bravery.
I got up and ran for the door, completely forgetting he was far too strong and fast for me, even if we were "equals". He punched me right in the gut as I was getting past him, knocking the air out of my now vestigial lungs
"Nah ah, there's no getting away from me."
I told him he should go to hell.
"I'll take your mother with me."
I stopped struggling. I glared at him, but was sure my shock and terror showed through silently betraying me.
"Oh come now. I suppose you're going to ask how I knew about your mother while you sob and slobber at my feet to please, please not hurt her. I heard you cry "mommy" as we killed you. Did some research; Miss Marie Jamie Kingston? Divorced now and only has one daughter."
He paused; my eyes confirmed all he just said.
He continued, "And now you're going to ask why. It is not uncommon for unplanned children of the night to run to their mommies and daddies, looking for acceptance despite being demons, then out of hunger they tear apart and ravage the very people they love and cared for most. It's a sad thing, you're lucky I'm nice enough to save you that guilt."
He smiled a cruel, sick smile. As if he thought he was a superhero because in all this cruelty, this madness, he feels he saved a life in the end. I broke eye contact for the second time since he entered the room, I stared at the floor. This couldn't be real, I thought. It couldn't be. But amidst my internal begging, for this to be just another nightmare, I knew it was true.
I was alone. There would no mom to save me, to tell me it was okay, to hold me and tell me she loved me. Instead there was this horrible sadistic teenager holding me hostage, threatening to kill her if I tried to escape.
"What am I supposed to do." I was drained; I couldn't add the magic tone in the end to make it an inquisitive statement.
"Stay with me, fear me, and obey me. I brought you into this world, it may have been on accident, but I did it." He replied solemnly, again he changed his colors.
"Why should I." I rasped, my throat tightening unbearably from the ache.
"You are tied to me by supernatural means. I bit you first, so I was the one you, in a sense, bonded with. You are tied to me until the head honcho, whoever it will be at that time, decides you are ready to be alone and breaks it. It may take many years, even centuries, but we will know when that time comes."
"What would happen if I escape."
"Before our 'bond' ends, if you should get too far from me and the ones in power find out, we will both be hunted and killed. If you have thoughts of suicide, and try to run anyway, before they get me I will kill everyone you knew when you were human, and I don't care if they have kids by that time. Then I will come after you. Understood?"
I didn't understand. I didn't understand any of this. Vampires were supposed to be free, not have some kind of government. Fuck, vampires aren't even supposed to exist!
"You know, this is quite embarrassing, but typically you're supposed to transform a member of the opposite gender for romantic purposes. I sure screwed that up didn't I?" He laughed an empty laugh. It wasn't funny.
I suddenly felt hurt because I wasn't wanted. I felt like one of those kids that would've been aborted if it wasn't for guilt or law. The only person who cared for me was my mother, who is now and forever, out of my life.
"Why do vampires have laws?" I managed to get a little life in my voice, how ironic.
"Vampires have been around for an awfully long time. Like any other society we have different religions, customs, and laws. To keep it simple, only vampires kill vampires, humans are just prey. Only vampires judge other vampires. We managed to keep it a secret because it is necessary to our survival. If people knew for sure we existed we'd be hunted and killed all over, we'd be studied as a whole other science, as our genetic make-up is so much more complicated and superior. Or even worse, they make everyone vampires. We are our own people living underground, or you could say, right under your noses."
I nodded. It was all I could do. No wonder they have an indefinite training period for newborns, there is so much to learn.
He was sitting next to me now, on the floor. I had my knees tucked under my chin in a fetal position. He sat cross-legged and slouched over to rest his head in his hands.
After a few moments of silence I noticed him reaching a hand towards my head, as if to stroke my hair comfortingly, he paused a few inches away, calculating. He withdrew, and I was glad, I wanted to keep him pinned as my jailor, my enemy, not a possible lover in the stupid vampire world.
"You hungry?" He inquired awkwardly breaking the already awkward silence.
I nodded. It was really sick wasn't it? It seemed like a normal question to a guest in one's house, a question that shouldn't be asked and answered as if I wasn't a hostage.
"Can I get a sandwich?" I asked. I was just being a little mocking now. I was bitter and who could blame me?
He laughed. He laughed so hard he was shaking.
"Oh Emily, you are such a silly little girl."
I just gave him my trademark 'What the hell do you mean?' blank look. He answered it with an angry expression and left. I'm telling you, that man is on his period or something.
I occupied the time of his absence by trying to sleep. I couldn't, I was wide awake. I closed my eyes but my mind was still buzzing. I was wide awake no matter what relaxation exercises I did. I remember hearing that vampires didn't sleep in some fictions. I could pretend to sleep by daydreaming however. I suppose vampires would take up sleeping hours by meditation, it is the only thing that could come close.
The door slammed open and the angry nineteen year-old stood there clutching a sandwich in his hand. He threw it to me. I opened it and took a bite without hesitation. I instantly gagged, it tasted horrible! It was like eating dirt! I threw it into the trash bin a few feet away and whirled around.
"What did you do!?" I yelled. I was hungry and he tortures me by getting me old crappy food.
"I nicely bought you a sandwich." He said calmly, I could see an amused smirk tugging at his lips.
"Why does it taste so bad!?" I pleaded. This couldn't be happening; food was my only comfort when I was upset.
"Your new and improved body only needs blood. It is all your body will ever need and crave. Your craving of the sandwich was habit, and so that is why the taste was not what you expected. It wasn't what you truly wanted."
"And where would I get that…" I did not like where this was going. Hell, I didn't like where this was going since I came here.
"Don't worry, I know your first kill is very hard, so I will do you a favor and bring you blood in a cup or something. You won't absolutely need blood for a little while longer at most. We need to introduce you slowly to your new diet so that you don't get blood crazy."
He turned around and started for the door again.
"Wait." I said, a little too desperately.
He stopped but did not turn.
"What is your name?" I asked again.
"Master." He replied, black humor evident.
"Seriously." I snapped.
I watched Gerard disappear behind the door. I was just standing around knowing that if I had a working heart it would be pounding and I would be blushing. I don't really know why. I think it's because he is hopelessly good-looking and hearing his name struck a chord in my…broken heart. I shook my head vigorously. I hate him. I hate him. He ruined my life. He ENDED my life. I want to kill him. Yea, I want to kill him!
I was trying to remember how silky and seductive his voice was, remembering the things he said, trying to find a method he used to make me feel this way. It must be a vampire thing, and that's all, a weapon. I couldn't possibly like this guy. I remembered him mentioning a bond—and I bolted out the door.
I ran up the furiously squeaking stairs, so it was a basement after all. And I dashed through the living room at the fastest speed I could manage. I should have tripped as there were multiple broken crates everywhere. Much to my surprise I leaped over and dodged all the obstacles without really thinking. It was second nature as if I was a graceful predator. I just stepped outside and after I realized it was daylight I stopped for a moment, expecting any tell tale signs of turning into a pile of ash. I didn't feel any different and laughed at my assumption. Yet who could blame me? If vampires are real then why shouldn't their weaknesses be?
was running down the street again and soon I subconsciously started
to sniff for his scent. I stopped as soon as I caught myself, feeling
embarrassed and confused at my new instinctive behavior. I
stood at the corner of two unknown streets. I didn't bother to look
at the signs; I have more important things to do than try to remember
how to get back to my personal hell. Cautiously I sniffed and
concentrated on him in my mind. Suddenly there was a faint scent; it
was a mix of blood and some musky smell. Trusting my new instincts I
followed it. I had no other leads to his whereabouts; he was too damn
fast for me to catch up at this point.
It started to smell stronger and stronger I was looking at the ground as I ran. I was making sure I didn't trip over any rocks and—BAM!
I ran into someone tall and in a black trench coat. I fell hard on my buttocks and in these loose gym shorts it hurt like hell. I looked up to see Gerard glaring down at me. I smirked slightly; I hoped he didn't see it. I couldn't help it. I won this game. However my fun ended as quickly as it came.
He saw it.
He reached down, grabbed my elbow, and yanked me up. I almost flew. He started to walk again to his unknown destination pulling me along. My brown messy hair was almost completely covering my eyes as I didn't have enough time to pull my hair back after being dragged up. I heard him mumble miscellaneous obscenities as I felt his grip on my arm go tighter. How can this hurt? How can blood still be flowing to make my nerves work if my heart is dead?
"Stop it. It hurts." I notified him.
He stopped and I almost walked right into him.
He turned around slowly. My God, he was so much more amazing in the sunlight. I had to work very hard to not smile giddily.
His eyes were very hard. I guess I really was expected to stay in the basement.
"It hurts?" He asked with his skepticism evident. He never let go of my arm, he only squeezed tighter, and I let out a pained gasp. I nodded weakly. It hurt so much.
"Yes…the mind is strange. I remember now." He looked wistful at the moment, as if he was remembering a time from long ago.
He looked at me, almost tenderly, as If he cared about my confusion.
"Your mind remembers the right times to feel pain so you think you feel it in these—types of situations."
He nudged his head towards his hang gripping my arm to show me what situation he was referring to. I gave him the 'What the hell do you mean?' look. He sighed as if it were obvious.
"Let say, for example, a human loses his arm. There is a thing called a ghost pain or ghost itch, which means even with the limb no longer present, his brain makes him think the arm still itches. The poor fellow goes to scratch his arm, only to realize the arm isn't there again. This goes on until the shock is gone and the brain finally picks up that the arm isn't there." He gave me a hopeful look that I might get it now.
I said, "Huh?"
He dropped his head and growled. When he growled chills went up my spine. It was so scary…and dangerously alluring. I bit my lip so it hurt. I have to stop thinking these things!
"Um, okay," He covered his mouth with his hand in thought for a moment, "Have you ever felt as if your phone was vibrating from a text message, only to find you didn't have your phone in your pocket?"
"Yea..." I was not getting it.
He looked at me with an exasperated expression.
"Oh!" It finally hit me. I wasn't really feeling pain, I only thought I should, just like I keep breathing, and fainting, and think my heart is pounding when in reality they weren't working at all.
"So if you would kindly remind yourself of this, I think you shouldn't have to faint anymore or whine to me about pain." He sounded very impatient. He started to walk again, still clutching my arm. It still hurt but I wanted it to. It was the only way I could feel somewhat alive.
I noticed the few people around, walking with or past us; these faces seemed so unfamiliar even though I lived in New York for two years. I know it is a big city, but surely I would recognize someone from on the subway, something.
"They look unfamiliar to you." Gerard stated. It wasn't a question.
I wondered how the hell he seems to read my mind.
"You have the eyes of an immortal. A vision you can only imagine as a human. Details are so much more prominent. Just wait until you see how well you can see in the dark. Everything will look different and soon your brain will adjust, it will recognize the new shapes to also be the old shapes you knew. It will about take a month or so. Don't worry."
"How come my ears seem normal? Wouldn't I be screaming in pain from hearing loud voices all the time?"
"You were screaming so much while transforming that your ears have already adjusted. And you didn't notice the new sight ability in the basement because you became used to it in your times of real pain subconsciously. You must have not noticed before while tracking me because your mind was too occupied." I stared at the back of his head; his hair was so glossy and flawless. It shone bluish at some parts. I could almost see every individual strand, as if someone put a heavy Sharp filter on it. Everything seemed like that.
How is it that Gerard seemed to know everything I wanted to ask? Were there others he mentored?
looked at the ground as I asked the question that made me nervous,
"Am I the first?"
He slowed down his speed; we must have walked about six blocks now. He seemed to hesitate.
"Yes, you are the first."
I smiled as I thought of my childish reply that he is probably going to mock me for.
"I think you're doing a great job then."
"Oh really, for a vampire teaching the newborn he never really wanted? I'm glad you think so."
I still smiled wryly. I think he can't surprise me anymore. I totally predicted that sort of reply.
One second I was walking and the next I'm pinned up against an alleyway wall just around the corner of a store. My wrists were over my head and I felt a knee was pressed below my pelvis to keep me from thrashing my body around. If I still needed to breathe I would have passed out from the surprise attack.
"Wow, you didn't faint." I heard Gerard say half-heartedly.
I had my eyes closed. I didn't want to see how close his face was.
"I wish I could see the blush you would have had if you were alive. It would be quite entertaining." He was making fun of me. He knew about my confused crush on him. That bastard!
I refused to speak. I would not let him have this much control over me. He wants a reaction? Well Gerard, you are not going to get one. Suck on that you stupid vampire.
"What's this? Poor Emily thinks she doesn't have to talk to me. Listen to me little girl, I am in control. You are mine now and you will speak to me." I sensed the slight annoyance in his voice. I am winning again. I pressed my lips together tightly to get my point across. I felt him adjust the holding of my wrists to where only one hand was holding them both, he was unbelievably strong, and it was as if my hands were in cement.
Oh God…what is he going to do with his free hand?
He grabbed my chin and made me look up so I would have seen his eyes if had my own open. At that thought, I was curious to see his expression and without the conscious command my eyes opened. His eyes were…red, not figuratively, but literally blood red. He moved his head slowly and went to whisper into my ear, I felt his cheek brush against mine.
"I don't have to like you to touch you. And I don't mean the nice way you think of when you look at me like I'm some god. I would be violent. So don't tempt me by playing hard to get. Stay with me, fear me, and obey me and I will be civil." I heard the smirk in his silky smooth voice with once again the sick message.
"I thought if you wanted me in that way I'd be under you by now." I needed to test him as he was testing me.
He pressed against me harder. I would definitely be suffocating and gasping for air. It was everything I could do to remember I didn't need to breathe so I wouldn't panic.
"I don't want you. I don't have to like you to touch you. It could be solely on a whim."
"You're not making sense." Why would you touch someone without liking them?
"You have false ideas of love and lust. When you are as old as me the girl just has to be decent looking when you're in the mood."
"You're dead, how would you feel it?"
"I still remember what pleasure feels like."
"And the mood?"
"Feels as any human male would feel."
"Don't you remember what love feels like?" I'm going to do my best to not picture the image he just referenced to. Doesn't he need blood flow for that?
"I can't hold on to emotional feelings, I can only hold on to physical feelings for memory." It sounded like he was scrambling excuses together.
"Who are you? Do you even know yourself?"
"What do you mean?"
"You can seem to be nice and comforting, you can be cocky, and you can be evil and crude. You switch so suddenly."
"Sorry." He let go of me and I almost fell over, he was supporting my weight this whole time. He acted as though he really did regret what happened.
I looked at him incredulously. What the hell? Another mood switch? Is he schizophrenic?
"What do you mean sorry?!" I asked in a shrill voice. How dare him! Insulting me! He looked at me with soft eyes.
"I'm sorry…when you are as old as me you develop interesting sides to yourself. There are many lifetimes where I am the nice boy in the corner and there were times I was like the infamous Jack the Ripper. Most historical powerful figures are vampires. Some of us were kings and dukes; we were so rich from lifetimes of collecting valuables. Once things began to be documented we had to hide…they would figure out how our faces never changed, we faked our deaths after a few years of ruling or existing as an identity so no one would find out. Especially after the witch hunts…yes…the hunts were always fun."
I was sitting on the ground leaning against the dirty brick wall staring at him. That was what was going on; he's senile in his own way. Even when he's talking he seems to go off on tangents. What have I gotten myself into?
"I'm not senile; I can hear what you're thinking. I will be back to normal soon, it—it's just this whole thing has brought a shock to me as well. I ruined your life and I do feel guilty for it. If I could change things I would believe me." He was kneeling in front of me now. His eyes showed a deep emotion. I couldn't appreciate the apology because my mind was reeling at the fact that he could hear what I was thinking.
"You are just so frustrating!" He grabbed my shoulders, his face showed desperation for me to understand whatever it is he was going through now. Mood swings…
"You are so arrogant! You think you can just disobey me like that? What if they got you?!" He was digging his nails into my shoulders, I reminded myself the pain wasn't real; I needed to focus on what Gerard was saying.
"W-who-" I started to ask, but he was already on it.
"The Seraphim." Gerard rasped and so it made quite a dramatic effect.
He was about to answer but he stood up so fast it made his coat fly into my face. Annoyed I got up quickly as well.
"What is your problem now?" I demanded, but then…someone covered my mouth, reached around my torso and started to pull me deeper into the shadows of the alleyway. I kicked and thrashed and tried to scream but only a loud strangled noise escaped my throat. I was panicking—panicking—
I—I can't breathe…