Hello. My name is Jehonne Doe. I used to be called Jane or Janie. God, that name brings back memories. See, I have not been called Jane in exactly six months today. Exactly six months ago my girlfriend, Casey Winters, killed herself.
Several times I have thought about following her, but I have not. I am not really sure why, I guess it is just that I do not think Casey would have wanted that.
For the week after Casey died I kept my silence, did not say one single word. Just like Casey. She did not need words, why should I?
In her suicide note she asked me to go visit her mother. She hated her mother. She asked me to tell her some things. So I did. It is what Casey wanted. I would do whatever Casey wants.
Lilian Winters did not seem surprised to see me when I went to her house. Casey's sister, Lachilan, let me in. She looked sad, she was the only one who did.
Lachilan showed us into one of their many living rooms where Lilian Winters was waiting. Lachilan looked almost like a servant, more than a part of the family.
"What can I do for you Miss Doe?" asked Lilian Winters, polite for the first time that I had ever seen.
"Casey wanted me to tell you some things" I began.
"My daughter's name is Cassidy" Lilian Winters interrupted. I ignored her.
"She wanted me to tell you that she knew about Cassie. She wanted you to know that you could have saved her. She wanted you to know that this could be your fault."
"Her name is Cassandra, not Cassie"
"Casey told me to call her Cassie." I turned to Lachilan, "She wanted you to know that you could have saved her."
"That's enough of this nonsense. Out of my house" ordered Lilian Winters. I turned and walked out. There was no need to stay any longer.
I had just shut the door when Lachilan came running out of the house.
I stopped, but did not turn.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have told her I couldn't help. I should have made Danny go away. I should have..." she trailed off.
"Yes, you should have" I told her turning around.
She looked down.
"Just...let me know when the funeral is. Despite the fact that she probably hated me, she was still my sister"
I nodded and walked back to the car.
The funeral was small. Casey did not really have many friends, she did not trust enough for that. It was just me, my mother, Lachilan, and a few random kids from school.
She was buried next to Cassie like she wanted to be. I left Cassie some dandelions that day, like Casey wanted me to. I have not been back since. Well, until today that is.
She died exactly six months ago. I remember that day as if it was yesterday. And the night before. The best night of my life followed by the worst morning ever.
It is Tuesday. I went by her grave after school, Casey would not have wanted me to miss school. She hated that.
I know she said not to bring her anything, but I could not help myself. I brought Cassie some dandelions. I brought Casey a little toy swing. She loved swings. That is how I met her, on the swing.
I did not say anything while I was there, I have said very little in the last six months.
Both me and Lachilan have found a comfort in silence. I rarely speak now, I have little to say to anyone. I try not to go out of my way not to talk, Casey would not have wanted that. I do not think she enjoyed silence. She just knew nothing else.
I sat there at her grave, Indian style because that is how how Casey always sat, for a few hours. At some point that I am not clear of Lachilan sat next to me. She brought some flowers for both of them. We said nothing and left together as it began to get dark.
Sometimes I wish that Casey was still alive, not because I want her to be subjected to the torture that was her life, but because I wish that that was not how it had to be.
I see the bruises on Lachilan now. Every time I see those I know Casey was right. She could never truly leave that behind no matter how hard she tried. She did the right thing for herself. I know that, no matter how much I miss you.
People keep telling me I have to forget, but I do not want to. Casey would say that was pointless. She never wanted to be forgotten. Someone has to remember her. I will always remember her. It is what she needed.
There has been a lot of talk about the Winter house in the last month. Lachilan ran away, she lives with a friend now. Casey's death hit her harder than anyone expected it to. Lilian Winters is sick, she is dying. It was in the paper because she is rich. She is not expected to live longer than a year. She is going to die all alone. I am glad of that. I think Casey may have liked that.
I am going to the swings tonight, to the park where I met Casey. I go there all the time. I do not go to the park behind the school anymore. There is no need to.
RIP Casey. I still love you, and I will until the second I die. I hope you know that wherever you are.
AN: Alright, I didn't edit this as much as I did everything else because I got lazy, but here it is. I may go back and change it at some point, but for now this is the end.