A/N: I wrote this today. It mostly deals with what I've been feeling since I got home from school. I might post some stuff I wrote when I was there, depends if I find anything worthwhile. I haven't been writing nearly as decently as I used to. Anyway, enough rambling, R&R me, I'll R&R you :].
There's an ache in my heart,
where my friends used to be,
where my smile used to be,
where my opinions used to be.
I've had them taken away from me before,
when that dark place inside threw them out the door.
This is different, this is new,
this is the friendship bracelet of different directions unraveling for good.
Each knot we tied with careful hands,
kissed each other's wrists for luck,
luck we were convinced we wouldn't have without each other.
The threads are loose, individual strings coming unattached,
one more tug would send them flying through the air.
Or would it send them to the cold, hard, ground?
I'm not sure which, so I hold on tight,
try to keep it together for one more night.
These past few years, I've lost and gained more than I ever thought possible.
I'm not prepared to lose again,
I'm not prepared for another goodbye,
and yet I'm in stages of grief.
I would call it denial,
but even denial requires a level of acceptance.
I can't accept this, I can't let you go.
I've let too many people walk away,
shoved far too many people away,
and the few that I didn't, I need around.
I can't stop thinking about that cold, hard ground.
The bracelet's colors flash in my mind, red and purple and green and white,
I twirl the strands around rough hands,
continue to question where Time went.