Who knew?
6/8/o6 thurs.
Trace had once said that Phoenix was the type of woman who needed a man she could submit to. She had scoffed at the absurd statement, a slight blushing staining her cheeks as she told her brother-in-law that she didn't know what he was talking about.
Phoenix was a strong person on the outside. She helped others and did everything she could do to ease any discomfort for a loved one, even sometimes for strangers. She didn't bother anyone to an extreme extent (at least not any more), and she was always putting everyone else before her. She was considerate of other peoples needs first and foremost, before she ever even thought about her own.
She was strong. On the outside. Inside, however, was a different story.
Within her was the soul of a scared little girl. A little girl that wanted to be just as strong as her sister, just as strong as her mother, just as strong as her father. But constant rejection from men who were more interested in her well developed twin kept her from being like Miaka. The inability to be so feminine and yet so strong kept her from being like Amaya. And the early disappearance and sudden death of her hero kept her from being like Shiro. She was who she was, and that happened to be a slip of a girl looking for any kind of acceptance where ever she could find it.
She was inferior to everyone she knew in every way, and that's why she kept pushing herself to be stronger. It worked, at least to the extent that she was no longer weak in front of people. In her head though, doubts ran rampant. All her failures and negative thoughts that made her up were released whenever she was angered. She would yell, hit, curse and pop a vein or two. Then her ghosts would come right back to her after it was all said and done.
Outside, she was fiery and self-assured. Inside, she was crying and lonely.
Trace had said she needed a man she could submit to. After years of building up her outer layer, there was no way that she would be able to succumb to anyone.
But then a wanderer entered her family's tavern one day, and immediately her heart had called out to him. She grew so attached to him so quickly, it was almost funny – in a mocking sort of way. This sudden attraction had made her feel worse. Was she honestly so weak that she would give in to anyone who showed her kindness? This specific thought occurred to her almost daily, even after they had become closer than the usual tenant and landlady should.
With every subtle caress of his hand against her skin, he would bring out a bit of her weakness. With every brush of his lips across her mouth, she would open up a little more. With every loving gaze from passionate red eyes, that scared little girl would come out and say hello. There were even points in their life that he had made her so weak, that if it weren't for his arms wrapped protectively around her waist, she felt that she would break apart and fall into a pile of broken pieces that were once herself.
The same arms that held her up – held her together, further weakened her more.
Their relationship had easily developed into the point where with a simple smile or a purr against her neck, her inner self would stop the tears and embrace the man that she in truth, had submitted to.
But then her thoughts shifted into a more positive set.
She couldn't see that with anyone else, how submission could feel so good. How giving in could ease one's worries. How having someone to lean on made the rest at night a little more fulfilling.
Phoenix didn't know how just one man could turn her entire existence inside out.
But he did.
Somehow, this kind-hearted, mild mannered, sweet talking gentleman of a vagabond changed everything for the better. In the depths of his eyes, she would see her soul smiling back at her. In the fierce security of his arms, she could feel her inner self relax within the warm embrace. When his tail would come up to wrap around her thigh or waist, she giggled along with her spiritual image. And when they would kiss, her soul mingled with his and they each shared the burden of their lives within a single lip lock.
It was unbelievable that single man could do this to her. That a man could draw out her weakness so easily.
But this was the same man who made her accept her weakness and even come to understand that everyone has such a part of them inside, somewhere deep within.
Even him. Even this almighty great man that she was to spend the rest of her life with.
The man who went by the name of Arca Ranger.
Owari!