NO BUSINESS LIKE SHOW BUSINESS

DISCLAIMER: The next real story never happened...

Oh what a glorious day for the great "presidente" of the Coconut's Republic, Hernan Chaves! No, it wasn't a day to free the political prisoners, or to declare war against the "Imperialistic Yankees", it was something even better: His first red carpet.

-Hey Chaves, over here! - Shouted all the paparazzo's, taking pictures of a historical moment; a world leader was in the same place of the movie industry elite: The Venasty Film Festival

But, how could this be possible? Well, we all have seen stranger things in this crazy world: A man on the Moon, the end of the Soviet Union, Adam Lambert been defeated in American Idol by, you know, that guy, so, why not a socialist president in a red carpet?

Actually, Hernan was invited by one of the best directors in Hollywood: Oliver Stoner, filmmaker of "FDR", "Natural Born Losers" and some crappy movie based in the Greek leader, "Pericles"; the reason? "El presidente" Chaves was his inspiration for his new documentary "Southern Paradise", where he tries to portray the life in the Coconut's Republic.

What a delightful event! All the beautiful people, the great movies, the stars and the glamour: Who said you can't mix celebrities with old Marxist ideologies?

And in the end of the premiere, Presidente Chaves was interviewed in his Hotel room by an American Journalist: Mister Talkalot

-So,what do you think about the movie?- Talkalot said

-It was wonderful, I tell you: Kick out of the cities to all the dissidents surely worked!-

-I'm sorry, what?-

-Oh, nothing, nothing…-

-Do you think is a real portrait of the living conditions in the Coconut's Republic?-

-Well, yes, but you know, there is a difference between "real" and "movie real".-

-What do you mean presidente?-

-Oh, you know: It's like "The Day After Tomorrow"…Yeah, is "real" in the sense than Global Warming is real, is just…"Improved", you know, to make it interesting…-

-Right…And now, I'm gonna be a little hard: What do you think about your critics?-

-Critics?-

-Yeah, the political critics, in your country, in America, well, in general, the people who keep saying you're nothing but a dictator.-

-Well, I'm just going to say this: I know where you live…-

The inverview lasted several minutes, until Talkalot finally made the question he always wanted to do:

-Alright…I know you're a busy man, so I'm gonna make my last question: What do you think of America?-´

-I think they're the same Imperialistic pigs, but at least you're improving: 50 years ago, somebody like me, crushing with the opposition, the civil liberties and expanding my influence in the region would hadn't been tolerated, but today…I'm drinking champagne! And I'm befriending with the big names of Hollywood! Did you know Steven Spielstein want to make another movie about me?-

-Ahem, no…-

-Well, it wouldn't take too long, so next time, maybe I'll see you in Hollywood!-

Then, the interviewed ended, and "el presidente" took his flight to his glorious country: Being a world leader and now a movie festival celebrity is never easy…