I cried deliberately, allowing the tears to easily fall across cold cheeks and under the collar of my nightgown. The pink sky looming above, the snowfall of natures own tears mixing with my own before landing softly on the ground.
It was already dark out, the white snow clouds had turn paler in color turning the horizon into a shade of pink. A slight breeze on the air chilled my bones as I walked, the sound of my feet crunching through the already frozen snow echoing through the night.
I could see a figure approaching from the distance, and wiped the tears away from my eyes. A lump formed in my throat as I got closer, wondering if perhaps he was a dangerous sort of stranger or maybe just a resident from nearby. A faint feeling ran up my spine as my eyes met with his, jolted I stopped in my tracks and debated heading the other way.
Yet something called to me, in a calm, comforting kind of way.
I realized who he was immediately after he greeted me. That alluring voice, those piercing eyes, they couldn't belong to anyone else.
"You sound surprised," he responded quietly.
"I thought myself insane," I replied, "and now I know I am."
Aubrey shook his head, "You're not insane."
I couldn't help but sigh at the way his black hair contrasted with the falling snow, "You wouldn't think so."
"Don't be stubborn," Aubrey grinned, "my dear Master."
I hesitated, "don't do that!"
"Are you so afraid to smile?"
I shook my head, "No not afraid, never afraid, you don't know me!"
Aubrey snorted, "I beg to differ."
"What do you think you know, Aubrey?"
"I know that you need me more now than you ever have," he replied.
I shook my head vigorously.
"My dear girl," Aubrey said quietly, "I am the one person that you cannot hide that look of pain from, which is so very visible in your eyes right now, along with the reaction of your cheeks to your tears."
Covering my face I held back tears, "Please don't say such things."
Aubrey sighed, stepping forward he wrapped his arms around me and pulled me against his chest, "You needn't fear me, Master, you are always safe in my arms."
"Why are you here?"
Aubrey smiled, "To make you believe in yourself once again, believe as I always have."
I sat down in the snow, my face still covered by my hands, "It's just too hard."
"Life is hard my sweet one," Aubrey corrected, "but harder for you."
"What did I do to deserve this?"
"You were born," he replied sadly, "and you became."
The tears strolled down my cheeks again, "what does that mean?"
"It means that only people who are to do great things, will have to suffer through great pain,"
Aubrey stated, "only someone who has suffered your kind of pain, will be able to grow and recover into someone more incredible than anyone else."
"I wish that changed how I felt now..."
"It probably won't," Aubrey said hesitantly, "but that's why I'm here...to help you along on your path."
I stood again, my eyes tired, "I'm so stupid."
Aubrey's hand reach for my chin, "Don't say that."
"It's true," I said sadly, "all I have is what doesn't exist."
"Do you mean me, my darling?"
I nodded sadly, "yes"
"Let me tell you something," Aubrey said, stepping forward to press his face lightly against mine, "I do exist."
"How can you when I created you?"
Aubrey's lips touched faintly against mine, "Because...I'm you, the strength and beauty within yourself that all your pain has created."
I couldn't stop myself from sobbing, "..."
Aubrey pulled me closer, "You will never be alone, I will never leave you, nor will I betray you...my Master, if you need something to hold onto, please, hold onto me."
I shook with understanding, everything finally sinking in as I came to terms with everything.
It was all true.