Addiction: a state of physiological or psychological dependence on a potentially harmful drug. Well, maybe not a drug, but it was addictive all the same. Though it was one of the most legal highs I could get in my life and it didn't cost me a thing… and it couldn't kill me or really do any harm – or so I thought back then.
The whole day I'd been itching for it and, as I approached my house, I could feel my whole body shaking in anticipation. In fact, I shook so hard, it took me five minutes to get the key into the lock.
I ran up the stairs to my room, rummaging about in my underwear drawer for my best friend in the whole world.
When I finally found it, I flicked out the blade. Light filtered in through the window and reflected off the silver metal. I pulled up my sleeves and looked over my arm, taking in the pale skin, divided by many tiny white lines.
I ran the blade over my arm, just allowing the cool metal to ghost over my skin, sending shivers of pleasure down my spine.
I repeated the action, pressing harder this time. I smiled as precious rubies beaded together on the cut. Again and again I drew the blade over my skin. Deeper and deeper until blood dripped off the tips of my fingers.
I laughed and looked at my mirror. The person that stared back was not me. There was no way. No, the girl in the mirror was pale and tears streaked her cheeks. Dark circles lined her red rimmed eyes and when she smiled, it looked hollow.
I dropped my friend to the floor and lifted my hand to my cheeks and felt the dampness of them. When I scrubbed at my face to remove the tears, a streak of blood was left in its path.
My mind grew cloudy and darkness started to eat away at my vision. My high disappeared, only to be replaced by panic - I didn't like the dark.
I felt all my energy leaking out of my being. My knees buckled and I fell forward, but didn't hit the floor. Instead, strong arms encircled me from behind and I was turned so I lay cradled in the person's embrace.
"Don't be scared," a man said, his voice deep but gentle, "You're safe now." Somewhere deep in the back of my mind, I recognised the voice, but I had no time to think on it.
I closed my eyes and drifted into the sweet oblivion I had been praying for…