The Disturbed Calm

The battlefield has finally gone silent.
The ground is littered with corpses.
The final battle was extremely violent...
Both sides fought against their remorses.

She stares out the window into the day
Her eyes gaze out into the distant space
Nobody knows her soul has gone far astray
None will know her emotions' been displaced.

She closes her eyes and puts up her shield
The mask by which behind she loves to hide
Fighting hard against tears, she won't yield
Refusing what comes when something's died.

In the depths of her mind, the words will replay
Over and over like a demonic tape distorted
Burying her in feelings from which she can't run away
Reminding her that her love was forever thwarted.

In the corners of her cloudy green eyes
The shimmering of warm, crystalline agony forms
Her breath escapes as two quivering sighs
And she's enveloped in another heavy rainstorm.

Oh, quickly she floods the space around her
With a river of a pure but murky blue
There's no one now left to her reassure
She pathetically murmurs, "And I loved you..."

She made a vow to speak of her pain no more
Taping her mouth shut with promising words
Refusing to speak to the one she still adores
Screaming out into echoes unheard.

She swore to herself she'd be okay!
She swore that she would stand up and live again!
Swore to them both that she would never stay
Stood up for herself and only then...

Did she realize that she's weaker than she thought—
That she cannot do this on her own—
Unprepared for the solidarity that her promises brought
Unaware how fast the misery had grown.

And yet she refuses to give in to the urge
To run back into his protective arms...
Feeling another icy, fiery, heartbroken surge
Another minute does its stinging harm.

She stays isolated in her internal, eternal jail
Refusing to acknowledge that there's life after death
She clutches her heart and feels another swell
Of sorrow coming forth in another shaky breath.

Maybe she's the only one who's been affected
And maybe she's the only one who cared...
Or maybe she ultimately hurt and disrespected
The only one that would be there...

The battlefield will forever be barren and silent,
The corpses all taken away to be embalmed.
And all that's left on this terrain once violent
Is a lasting, disturbing calm.