this was supposed to be a list of all the things I knew. but when my pen touched the paper
I broke in half.
and everything came flooding out of the holes you left. (with your perfectly lying teeth)
which is why (why!) I am here
choking on my heart muscles.
(I believe that people can see.)

swallowing things that were once considered poison.
(I won't tell)
has it been a year?
may I curl up?
I am-hopeless. (no, I am hopeful)
I am here and the pain is increasing.
(its getting harder to, breath)
(the heartbroken girl is starting to emerge)

the dam atop my spine is rupturing, sending acid down into my guts.
(what once was empty is not full)
I am fucked.

I could use a lot less (lies) all I want is more.

I hate being heartbroken in class.