I'm not quite sure how to breathe without you here beside me. I wasn't quite sure if I was ready to say goodbye to you and what we were. I begged you stay here, to be with me, just for now until time can decide when I am ready and when I won't need you anymore. I need you more than anything; I don't want to lie about it. My heart is aching for you. You were my salt to my pepper; we were Bonnie and Clyde. I thought we would be inseparable. I thought you would love me until the end. I had no idea you would leave me in the cold and the dark like this, hurting inside and yearning for you.
At night, lying in bed, my hand searches for yours, hoping that it might find it, and waiting for my fingers to interlace with your long fingers that were waiting for mine. But yet, you are not there. It's dark and I can't find you. I feel lost and alone. I miss you so much. Please help me. I miss you. I need you. I'm looking for you hoping you are looking for me. I feel alone, cold, and miserable. I miss your kisses, your touch, and the sound of your voice. I ask God to bring you back to me. But I fear that I have upset Him somehow as he doesn't answer my pleas or prayers. I feel like I am doomed to feel like this forever, aching for something that is not there, crying over a broken heart that will never be mended.
My eyes are red and the tears that I have shed over losing you stain my face. I am not sure if I can feel anymore. I am not sure if I care anymore. The sun doesn't help; it only makes it hurt more. The night seems to ease the pain, but yet, the night reminds me of you, so it hurts too. Every thing that I see now makes my chest tight and my eyes sting again. You left me with pain. So I ask this of you; please lie to me. Say you love me; say you are looking for me; say that you're sorry; say you're coming back. Feels like I am slipping away in this dark room, fading away into nothing. Disconnected to the world that has seemed to have forgotten about me, seemed to stop caring. I can't seem to get you out of my head; I cannot stop saying your name or dreaming of you as I sleep. Please, tell me I don't need you anymore.
How is this supposed to be? How am I supposed to feel? You're face is etched into my head, forever there. I hear you when you're not there; see you when it's just a shadow of nothing. Where will everything go from here? How can I survive? I need you. I need you with me, by my side, forever more. I am scared to be on my own without you there. You were my salt, and everything is bland without you here next to me; no colors to my sunsets, no smells to my rain, no warmth to my sun. Everything is not the same, not okay. You at least lied about that. Why can't you lie to me more? I need you. I feel empty and dead. There is no reason to keep going if you are not here. My body is just a shell of what I used to be, but there is nothing inside, my soul is gone, my heart is shattered. There is nothing left of me, nothing left of what I was. I need you to put me back, to make me whole. I love you. You loved me, once. Please, love me again. I know you can. Please. Love me. Come back to me. Please.