"Up in my lonely room
When I'm dreaming of you
Oh what can I do, I still need you,
but I don't want you now."
Liv didn't sleep at all last night, nor had she participated in Jemmy's loud New Years party. All she wanted to do was fall asleep forever.
That kiss had been real, very real. She hated him for that, for making her entire body heat up. She felt like a teenager, wildly in love with someone completely wrong for her. But he wasn't wrong for her, they were perfect for each other. Liv had never been so sure of anything in her entire life. But why? Why was he marrying Sarah?
It made no sense. A deep aching pain shot through her chest every time she thought of her sister standing at the alter with him.
In the early hours of the morning, Jemmy moved in his sleep and cuddled closer to her, rubbing his nose against her shoulder. He mumbled something and fell back into a deep sleep. Liv swallowed a sob. The only person she would ever be sleeping next to for the rest of her life was going to be Jemmy, or her oversized dog, while Sarah was going to be next to the only person she ever loved, night after night.
They were probably going to have babies and live happily ever after. Another sob crawled up her throat and escaped from her lips. How was she supposed to get over this?
In the morning, she was still awake; her eyes were red from silently crying. When the alarm went off and Jemmy awoke, Liv turned onto her side and closed her eyes tightly, hoping everyone would just forget about her.
"Wake up darling," Jemmy stroked back her hair. "Your sister is getting married today; you have to look absolutely perfect."
She opened her tired eyes and looked up at Jemmy. He saw the sadness in her big brown eyes and frowned. "It's going to be okay." He said softly.
Nodding he smiled a little, "I promise."
She nodded and sat up. "Okay, let's get ready."
A little later Solo and Ben were standing next to each other in the Fraser's cramped bathroom. Ben was brushing his teeth while Solo stared at his reflection. When Ben noticed Solo's abnormally quiet state he looked up.
"What wrong wi yooou?" He asked with the toothbrush still in his mouth.
Solo snapped out of his haunting thoughts. "Hm? Nothing." He'd been secretly freaking out all night.
She actually thought he was his brother! How did this happen? How did she not know there were two of them? It explained so much, yet so little. Her behavior towards him was now explained, but how was it possible that they'd met this way. Out of all the girls in the entire world his brother happen to be marrying into her family?
"Fate." He decided.
"Hm?" Ben asked.
Solo, realizing he'd said it out loud, bit his tongue. "Never mind." They were going to talk, it had to be done. This was the woman of his dreams; he wasn't letting her slip away.
Ben blinked after him, his mouth still full of toothpaste. He simply rolled his eyes and muttered, "So gay," under his breath.
The bridal suite at the church was simply the most beautiful thing Jemmy had ever seen. The second Liv and himself walked in he let out the most horrific screech. Liv cringed and nearly jumped back.
Sarah, the bride herself, sat in front of a large wooden vanity, covered in flowers and makeup. She spun on the stool to face them her eyes wide and scared. Her makeup was flawless, Liv wasn't sure she'd ever seen her sister any prettier. Her gorgeous red hair was swept up and away from her face, leaving a few delicate curls to bounce around her cheeks.
"I'm terrified." She breathed, pressing her hand against her chest.
"Everything is going to be wonderful." Jemmy said in his sing song voice. "Oh this room is stunning, is this taffeta?" He said sweeping over to the curtains and rubbing his cheek against them.
"What if he doesn't show up?"
"Why wouldn't he show up?" Liv asked, going over to her sister. She had her dress draped over her arm. It was a creamy color that would wash her out most definitely. Jemmy had done her hair before they left, it was similar to her sisters, only her sister was shining while Liv simply looked put-together.
"He might have changed his mind, you know that's what Solo's finance did. Now look at him, he's all silent and serious. I don't want to be silent and serious."
Liv raised her eyebrow. "Solo?" Familiar…
"Oohhhh, look the Virgin Mary." Jemmy cried and peered at the small figurine of Jesus' mother. He turned her around so she was facing the wall. "How totally excited are you to fuck your husband's brains out?"
"Jemmy!" Sarah cried, turning bright red. "You can't say that in a church."
"Yeah I would be too." He sighed not hearing her.
When the double doors flew open, everyone turned to see Shannon bursting into the room with Sarah's giant white gown. "Time to put this baby on!" Her large smile faded when she saw Liv. "Oh…" She said then turned her bright smile back on. "How nice of you to show up." Her tone was light, but Liv heard the sneer underneath. Had she done something to offend her?
"The dress is perfect." She was disgustingly pretty, Liv decided, not a flaw on her. Draping the dress over a lounge chair she brushed away a few wrinkles. "I'll help you get in it."
"Oh I'll do it." Liv smiled at her. "Thanks for bringing it."
Something hard passed over Shannon's face. "Don't worry about it, I can do it."
Liv resisted the urge to glare at her. She opened her mouth to retort but Sarah placed her well manicured hand on Shannon's shoulder. "How about you go check to make sure my finance hasn't run out on me."
Shannon's smile cracked, but she maintained she sweet allure. "Yeah, sure. I'll be back."
As Liv watched her leave she wondered just what Shannon was really doing at this wedding.
People were starting to gather in the church. Solo was running out of time to find her. Every time he made a break for it someone stopped him to help with some ridiculous task. His mother was already drunk, and it was his duty to make sure she didn't make a fool of herself.
She'd already blown her nose on the hem of some woman's dress, and now she was trying to steal flowers from the front entrance.
"Mom!" Solo cried and took the crumpled flowers from her hand and placed them back into the vase. "What are you doing?"
"Those would look wonderful by the front door at home, don't you think?"
"You can't steal flowers."
She waved her hand. "Oh no one will notice."
Just as he was pulling her away from the flowers he saw Liv's friend Jemmy walking by. "Hey!"
Jemmy stopped and squinted. "Which one are you?"
"Solo. Look, do you know where Liv is?"
"Upstairs with her sister. Why?"
"I need to talk to her."
Jemmy shifted and narrowed his eyes a little. "What about?"
Solo wasn't sure what was going on. "Can you put my mother in her seat? She's a little… unruly."
"Are you the gay one?" Meredith asked loudly.
Jemmy raised his eyebrow at her. "I am. Are you the drunk one?"
"You know Solo might be a little gay."
Jemmy rolled his eyes and took hold of her arm. "Oh, lucky me. Come on, Mrs. Adams, let's find your seat."
"You two would have such beautiful babies." She went on as they moved into the church. Solo watched them walk away, thankful he had a few moments to himself before the wedding started.
He bolted up the stairs and around the corner. This probably wasn't the best time for Liv to find out she wasn't actually in love with his brother, but with him instead, but it had to be better than watching her sister supposedly marry the man of her dreams.
The whole situation was insane. This needed to be resolved before something seriously messed up happened.
He was almost at the bridal suite. His heart was pounding, his hands were sweating. He was going to tell her and then she would fall into his arms and they'd live happily ever after.
He rounded a corner and there was Shannon. They both stopped shortly, startled. Then Shannon grinned. "Solo, there you are."
"And there you are."
"I've been looking for you."
"Because I want to talk to you." She took his hand and pulled him into the nearest room. It was the pastor's office, unfortunately he wasn't there.
"Shannon, I don't have time for this." He sighed.
She closed the door behind her and looked up at him. "I miss you."
He rolled his eyes. "This is ridiculous." When he went for the doorknob, Shannon placed her hand over it, stopping him. "Come on, I have to go."
"I know we can make it work this time. Give me a chance."
"Come on, we had so much fun."
Was she deaf? He didn't know how to make himself any clearer. "No I don't want-" She suddenly unzipped the back of her dress, letting it slide off her shoulders. "Oh my God, what are you doing?"
"I want you, Solo." The entire room seemed to shrink, he was too hot and too uncomfortable. Backing up he looked around for another door, there wasn't one. She moved closer. "Remember how it used to be?"
"You're insane." The desk was behind him, he was trapped.
"Touch me, Solo. We were good together when we were naked." She grabbed his hands and placed them on her chest. He froze. She growled seductively, it only made him want to throw up. He pulled his hands back but she threw herself on top of him, pressing her lips against him.
He was pushing against her just as there was a knock on the door. "Pastor?" The door opened slowly. Both Solo and Shannon froze. "Sorry to bother you, but Sarah was wondering-"
It was Liv.
She came into the room, wearing the same dress as Shannon. She stopped the second her eyes come on them, her entire face unreadable.
"Liv!" Solo cried.
"Oh my God…" She gasped.
Quickly, she backed out of the room and closed the door. Solo shoved Shannon roughly off her who was just staring in shock at the door. "There's really something going between you too, isn't there?"
He ignored her and raced out of the room. Liv was gone.
Liv was hyperventilating in a confessional booth. This was turning out to be the worst day ever.
Wiping her hand over her face she decided that she was going to tell Sarah. She was her sister, how could she let Sarah get married to a cheating womanizer. First her, then Shannon! Liv briefly wondered if he'd tried to get under Dina and Astrid's skirts.
She collected herself, breathing deeply. She was going to tell her sister. Yes, she would be devastated but the man of her… their dreams turned out to be not who they expected.
Just as she was about to leave the booth she watched Shannon pass in front of her and walk down the aisle to take her spot at the front of the church with Dina and Astrid. Liv glared at her. How could she do this to her sister? What a bitch.
Then Ben appeared, walking down the aisle; he looked cool and composed with a small smile on his face. He stood at the alter nervously clasping his hands. Liv's own hands curled into fists. She hated him. The happy feelings deep in her stomach she would feel whenever she thought of him were gone.
Leaving the booth she was about to march right up there and give him a piece of her mind, only Sarah stopped her.
"Liv!" She hissed from behind the partly closed door. Reluctantly she went to her sister.
Sarah was a vision in white. Liv felt her stomach clench. "Sarah… I have to tell you something."
Before she could utter another word Sarah crushed her into a hug. "I just want to tell you that I love you." With her arms dangling lifelessly against her side Liv held back a sob. "You've been pretty crazy this week, but thank you for being here. I'm so scared but so happy and I wouldn't want anyone else standing next to me up there than my sister."
The words were getting lost in her throat. "I…"
"No," Sarah cut in. "Don't say anything. If you do I'll start crying and ruin my makeup."
Liv's lips trembled. How could she let her sister do this?
Their father arrived a few minutes later and kissed them both on the forehead and said something about how beautiful they looked. Liv wasn't paying attention, her thoughts were all jumbled and her stomach was in knots.
She walked down the aisle to take her place next to the bride's mates. Jemmy stood next to Ben, who was looking around nervously. She briefly wondered where his brother was, or if he even had a brother for that fact, since she had yet to meet him.
When she got to the front Jemmy mouthed something to her. She shook her head, not understanding. He moved his mouth slowly, hoping she'd understand what he was asking.
She couldn't make out the rest so she shook her head. When she turned she caught a glimpse of Shannon who was glaring at her. Liv glared back then looked straight ahead.
This wedding was officially happening.
Solo had searched the entire church for her, and now he was late. He'd even gone to the parking lot to see if her car was still there then remembered she'd come with Jemmy.
Now, he was standing in front of the church being denied entrance.
"But I'm in the wedding! I'm the best man!"
"If you're in the wedding what are you doing out here?" The short pudgy man with the nametag that read Earl was staring up at him while he chopped down on a soggy old toothpick.
"I came out here to look for someone!" Solo was losing his mind. He just wanted to grab hold of the man and shake him until he understood the magnitude of the situation.
"Sorry man, I can't let anyone in once the wedding has started. It'll ruin the atmosphere."
"I have to be in there, I'm the best man."
"We'll you're not doing a very good job, huh?"
He groaned loudly and raked a hand through his messy hair. "I don't have time for any of this!" Annoyed he stalked off to look for another door. They were all locked.
When he heard the music start up he became desperate. And against his better judgment he grabbed a suitable sized rock and pressed his hand against the glass window he was about to smash. "God, forgive me." He muttered and threw the rock.
She could hear her heart pounding madly in her chest. Something bad was going to happen.
"We thank you all for coming on this joyous day." Said the pastor to everyone who sat quietly. Sarah had come down the aisle looking like a dream. Tears sprang to her eyes, which she quickly wiped away. She wasn't happy like her crying mother, she was dying inside.
"Before we begin I must ask if there is anyone who does not approve of this marriage. If so speak now or forever hold their peace." Liv's throat tightened, she felt the words scrambling up her throat, but she held them back. She couldn't do this, not in front of all these people, not in front of her sister.
Sarah signed silently to herself, and smiled up at Ben. Liv felt a cold sweat roll down her back.
"Now, the groom and bride have prepared vows to one another." The pastor gestured for Sarah to begin. She turned bright red and opened her mouth. A small squeak came out before she cleared her throat. "Ben…"
Everyone's heads turned towards Liv. She blanked. Had she said that? Out loud? Her stomach rolled painfully as she looked around the church. Her mother's eyes were wide and frozen. Sarah's were the same. Ben had a puzzled look on his face, which she avoided.
"Pardon me?" The pastor asked in a shaky voice.
Liv was in shock. Her mouth opened and closed like a fish. "I…" The small bouquet in her hand fell to the ground. "I… can't do this…"
This time Sarah was the confused one.
"You can't do what?" Asked the pastor.
Liv stepped down from the podium, her legs like jelly. "This isn't right."
"What are you doing?" Sarah hissed.
Liv walked backwards, away from the bride and groom, her back to the audience. "I love him." Her arm rose to point at Ben. The look on his face was somewhere between disbelief and confusion. "And he loved me!"
Whispers broke out among the people. Sarah dropped her own bouquet. "What?"
Jemmy, who was standing next to Sarah hurried down and grabbed Liv's arm. "Come on sweetheart, let's get you some air."
She ripped her arm away from him. "No! I don't need air! I need to understand what's going on. He's supposed to love me!"
Sarah's head snapped towards Ben. "What is she talking about?"
"I have no idea!" Ben cried.
Shannon looked like she was about to faint.
"Oh please, how can you say that! I just saw you with her." Liv pointed directly at Shannon. Now she fainted, with a loud smack against the wooden floor. The entire room burst into gasps."Did I mean nothing to you!" Tears formed in her eyes, she tried to wipe them away but they flowed back, blurring her vision. "All those hours we spent together, talking, they meant nothing to you?"
"Ben…" Sarah's voice was low.
"I have no idea what's she's talking about." He was concerned now, his hands were up, eyes wide.
"How could you do this to me? To Sarah? I gave you all of me!"
Sarah pressed her hand against her chest. "Oh God, this isn't happening."
"Liv!" Jemmy grabbed her again. "Stop it!"
"Get off me! He has to admit it! Admit what you did!"
Ben was turning a sickly shade of gray. "I don't…"
At that moment Solo came in from the back. He was breathing hard, his hair a mess with bits of glass in it. The whole room was murmuring in shock. Solo was confused and thought he was too late until he saw Liv standing at the front, with Jemmy trying to pull her away.
"You and my sister!" Sarah screamed.
"What?" Ben turned to her. "No, I never…"
"You fucking jerk!" She threw herself at him, her petite hands smacking him over and over again. Ben stumbled backwards trying to get a hold of her; he fell back, taking Sarah with him. She fell on top of him in a heap of fluffy white material. The entire room erupted into cries and shouts. Belinda Fraser looked like she was going to pass out.
And Liv, she was still screaming. "I loved you! How could you!"
Solo could only hear his heart beating walked slowly down the aisle towards Liv. There was so much commotion no one heard when he uttered Liv's name. She was standing alone now, in the middle of everything screaming up at Ben. Jemmy had given up and instead stood to the side with his hands in his hair.
"Liv…" Solo touched her shoulder. She knocked it off immediately. "Liv…"
"Don't touch me!" She spun around, her eyes rimmed red and clouded with tears. The shock hit her immediately. She looked more terrified than he'd ever seen her. Her mouth opened, the bottom jaw trembling.
Finally the room grew silent.
"Liv…" He breathed and touched her shoulder again.
A scream flew from her lips, making everyone jump, then her eyes rolled back into her head and she collapsed, hitting the floor with a loud thud.
For a few of the longest seconds Solo had ever experienced no one spoke, then from behind him, his mother's cheerful voice rang through the church.
"Solo has this effect on women."
I'm not even going to bother apologizing for the lateness of this chapter. This summer has been too insane. I finally just got a new computer because my old one died a horrible death. I'm officially back. OFFICIALLY I say! I'm updating twitter, blogging, all that jazz.
I'll be honest with you I haven't started a new chapter of Midnight Melody yet. But hopefully I will soon.
There is one chapter left. It's not going to be super long or anything so I'm going to try and get that out within a couple days.
Honestly if you're reading this, thanks for sticking around.
Check out the Broken Telephone playlist. I'm putting a new song on.
Oh and thanks to everyone who voted for Alice! Love you all!