October 14th, 2009

Recall, In a Dream

.

He was there. He is there.

There. There.

In my backyard.

I know he was, but in a dream.

In a far away type of place, that I won't be able to reach, in a reality that goes through distance and time.

I remember him being there, in that dream.

I remember the reaction, the way I felt.

It was all so real. So stupid, but real.

I was so trapped, I didn't realize until after.

I let disappointment hit me like a brick.

Let reality hit me even harder.

.

But it was a dream.

And it wasn't real.

And it won't ever be,

no matter how nice, or convenient,

no matter how addicted you are,

to that false feeling of hope.

.

It was a dream, but I still think about it,

and I still have to remind myself,

that it was just a dream.

I won't ever have that again,

It won't ever actually happen.

You should know by now,

that life is a stagnant,

as your dreams are exciting.

.

In a way, they make up for that loss,

and in a way, they bring only more pain,

for the release is only temporary,

and you can't ever have it back again.

And I wanted it to be real,

I thought it could have been,

but when you wake up,

you know there's no way.

It will only happen,

in a dream.