A/N: So…read and review. Based on an "inside joke" between me and my friends.

………………………………………………………………………………………

"Hey Stephord!"

The young elf nodded to the chubby, speckle-faced he-elf walking past him. Christmas wouldn't be for several months yet, but something about the atmosphere just didn't feel right. It wasn't that there wasn't enough snow or enough holly or sled-racing. There was plenty of that. It was the North Pole. Big red (otherwise known as Santa Clause) was constantly at work in his office with the long list of children—good and bad. Mrs. Clause was always baking goodies—cookies, brownies and the like. And all the elves were always working on the toys—building them, painting them, trying them out for the few seconds before there was that spec of scratch err—'worn out' appearance.

Everyone was happy here and everything was always just right, just perfect.

But Stephord was not just right. He was not just perfect.

Because earlier in the week he had fallen through that tiny pit in the clouds that no one even knew existed. He had fallen to earth and been caught in the midst of a girl ranting her misery on herself by way of a smack—or, as luck would have it, Stephord the elf.

"Guys!" she cried to the two girls walking beside her. "It was so awful! Today has just been complete crap. I didn't finish my paper, and I went to bed too early!!!"

One of the girl's eyebrows furrowed. "Didn't you say went to bed at 12:30?"

She didn't respond to the question. "I have so much to do and what if I miss one of my classes?!"

The other girl nodded along, frowning at the whole situation. Neither girl knew how to assist; both had been in the same situation at one point or another.

"I missed my first club…and then my second one…Sara and Melvin were incredibly unhelpful but they did drive cool cars and asked me about my major, so that was cool."

"But…you didn't—"

"Finish my 20-page paper? No."

The girl who had spoken first sighed. "Couldn't you just—"

"Turn it in late?! No, Christina," she whimper-cried. "I might get a C then! Or even worse…a B." She shuddered at the thought.

Sigh. "Well, I think you should still—"

And then it happened.

The girl—apparently named Alexandra—lifted her hand up, which had been dramatically gesturing just before, and made to smack herself. Only she didn't. She smacked—

"Ow!"

The three girls turned to the object voicing noise, and gasped. It was small, couldn't be more than three feet tall and was donned in bright red and green wear. There was a fuzzy red hat, adorned with some white puffies at the top…lying off to the side. It had fallen off his head and was lying on the sidewalk.

Marie—the other girl—bit her bottom lip softly while examining the 'thing'. "What do you think it is?" she asked.

"A munchkin?" Christina offered.

Alexandra scoffed. "It, rather HE I'm sure, is a hobbit."

The two quirked their heads in her direction. However she seemed unphased, beginning to feel around the velvet outfit for some sort of identification.

Christina cleared her throat and she looked to her.

"What?"

"A hobbit?" she raised her eyebrows.

"Yeah, don't they all have curly hair?"

Alexandra sighed testily. "Not all of them. Sam certainly didn't have very curly hair."

Christina rolled her eyes, peering over the body and suddenly noticing the twitching of its feet. "Lex," she reached out to touch her arm, "I think it's alive." Her eyes widened and Alexandra turned to gaze at the fluffy—looking to be natural-grown—colored boots it wore. Marie sucked in a breath.

"You don't think we should take it to a hospital, do you?"

"Ha! Like they would take him! He's either from the depths of Moria—"

"—that's for dwarves. We haven't even considered that as a possibility yet."

"—or a hobbit hole," Christina finished.

"An elf!" Marie announced, the idea suddenly sparking her. Her lips curved into a wide smile. "He must be from the North Pole!"

Before the other two could respond, though their knee-jerk facial expressions spoke well enough for them, the 'creature' snapped his head up, and in Alexandra's sudden 'need' to see what was going on with 'him', she smacked him not once more but three more times, or…in sets of three at least.

SMACK!

SMACK!

SMACK!

Gasp.

SMACK!

SMACK!

SMACK!

Gasp.

"Lex!!" the two called out to their friend, their senses going on alarm instantly.

"Gah! I'm sorry!" Alexandra backed away, afraid to touch the 'thing'. They had been kneeling before the 'creature', but all sprung to their feet at the unexpected movement.

It started coughing up sprinkles.

Marie and Alexandra huddled to each other. "What is it doing?" Christina asked, horrified and yet concerned simultaneously.

Silence.

The creature stood to his feet, and grabbed his hat, placing it on his blonde-covered head—with streaks of red. "Where's Santa Clause?"

Marie nodded. "It's a he," she stated.

"And definitely an elf, from the North Pole," Christina concluded. Alexandra muttered something about hobbit possibilities.

"What's your name?" Marie stepped towards it a little, suddenly feeling very cold and rubbing her arms to create some heat.

"Stephord."

All their eyes widened, like it had been the most horrific thing they'd ever heard in their lives. Ironically, no one else was now on the street. Snow had also begun to float down and the three looked around curiously, wondering if it was they who caused the sparkly ropes suddenly coming down from the sky. Maybe even other elves coming down on them?

Probably to search for Stephord.

It occurred to them then that they didn't believe in Santa Clause. That he was a myth—a legend, and this was probably some distorted version of a prank.

"Clyde!!" Christina shouted into the mist. If anyone caused something like this, it would have been him. Nothing.

Their drifting eyes met back with Stephord's curious gaze. It was clear he wanted to leave, especially with all the little brunette elves that were marching towards him from across the street. Yet still it was as if he was searching for the three girl's permission. They had found him, that was all, but strangely enough he wanted their permission.

Marie nodded, snapping a quick photo with her camera AND phone…at the same time.

Christina shook her head incredulously, repeating—inwardly—the non-existence of Santa Clause, but waved him off nonetheless.

Alexandra, officially enraptured by his red-blonde hair and suddenly noticeable deep green eyes, beamed and then frowned at the light imprint of her hand so very visible across his left cheek.

Sigh.

But he bounded away with the she-elves, and the next thing they knew…they were in a warm, cozy room in front of a humungous fireplace.

"I smacked. An elf." Alexandra gaped at herself, shaking her head. Christina and Marie leaned over and hugged her.

Maybe later they would just try and convince her it had all been a dream.

Scoff.

A dream.

Unlikely.

The smacks across his face were starting to burn. The girls who had come after him apparently were only doing Babgalia, the head she-elf, a favor…since her brother, Bobgeel, was particularly upset he wasn't building the toys for the upcoming Christmas season. Not to mention how long it had taken Stephord to convince him not to put Alexandra, Christina & Marie on the naughty list.

If he didn't know any better, he'd think Bobgeel induced more painful burning on his cheek just for that.

"Stephord!" Cralinet, the chubby he-elf from before, came waddling over and informed him of his presence needed in Big Red's courtroom.

Sigh.

Nothing he hadn't expected.

Either Rudolph's red nose needed new batteries or Mrs. Clause ran out of either frosting or sugary sweetness.

"I'm coming," Stephord mumbled, coming to Cralinet and turning for the giant graham cracker and cinnamon stick castle in the distance.

"No, it's not what you think!" he insisted, turning him in the opposite direction. "You have visitors." He nodded, enthusiastically. Stephord's eyebrows furrowed.

"Visitors?"

"Mmhmm, from earth." He turned to him, trying to hold back his excitement.

"Earth? How would they get up here then? Santa doesn't go down for another two months, their-time."

Cralinet shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe one of the ropes the girls used to bring you back didn't get rolled back up. And you know, only those she-humans could see you…and the rope."

"Huh," he contemplated the idea, when suddenly something hit them. "Wait, so is it those girls that came to visit me then?!"

Cralinet shrugged again. "I don't know, but one of them has been trying to convince the others that you're actually a hobbit, for an hour now."

His eyes widened.

Gulp.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………

A/N: Okay, I don't really know what this is. XD I'm contemplating making a continuance of this fic with the elf and these girls…or just making a bunch of little one-shots combined of my inside jokes with my friends…in stories. Heh. If you actually read this though…please review!