I wish I could put down this burden I carry around with me like some baby, heavy in my womb. I want to just forget you, pretend you do not exist, that you never did...that we never did. I want to believe I haven't even met my best friend yet, that they're still out there waiting to meet me. That fate has yet to make us run into each other. But, the truth is, I have met my best friend. She was you. We were normal teenage girls! We laughed, and we shared all our secrets, sang together, stayed up too late, shared a dorm at camp, and we wrote that book together. That's what we were, together. And we had so much fun together, we did. I won't ever deny that. I have so many memories, so many pictures of you, of us. I talked to you everyday for hours on the phone and I never got bored with you. I gave you advice when needed, consoled you when you were sad, calmed you down. And in fact, I loved you. It wasn't good enough for you, though. I was still the screw up, the failure. All the while, you loved yourself, your ambition, more than you ever cared about me. My advice wasn't worth crap, even though I had experience in some of the things you were going through. But I didn't know anything, did I? I was never, and never will be, as perfect as you. But, I know that I'm stronger for what happened between us, no matter how much it sucked, and still does. I'm just so tired of carrying this burden, so heavy in my arms. Five thousand miles have passed beneath the soles of my shoes and my arms, my heart aches so bad. So, I'm going to put this broken essence of us, our beautiful friendship, on the ground. And I'm going to keep walking into the sunset, one foot in front of the other. So, I'll see you later maybe. Goodbye.
Hoping you are well,